How to Adjust the Narrative You are telling to Yourself as a Non Native Speaker

#PublicSpeaking #CommunicationConfidence #MindsetShift #NonNativeSpeakers #Leadership

Imagining that you are going to give a presentation to a room full of potential clients or you are going to lead an international meeting, what are telling to Yourself about your non native language, French or English? You start creating all kind of scenarios: ”I am not enough good!”, ”If I say something wrong!”, ”If I can not express myself the way I want!”, ”If I make any mistake and they start laughing on me!”, ”If I get stuck!”, ”If they do not understand me?”. Your Inner voice is taking hold, undermining your confidence and minimising your chances of making that good impression and run out like a Star.

And it is not about your French or English, or about You, it is about your best-friend, Your Inner Voice, that always finds way to creep in, instill fear in You and self-sabotaging your true potential together with your Self-Esteem. And sometimes, It is telling to you to better stay away and do not show up or speak up because You are not enough good.

But You are not the only one. Every human being posses one of these inner voices to self question, doubt, and challenge your dreams, aspiration, qualities and sense of self. It’s a survival mechanism our ancestors needed to keep them safe from wild animals or big natural disasters, but in modern-day society this voice has evolved into this untamed inner beast that can often encourage us to shy away from greatness.

May be You are wondering how you can step away from from these inner voices and negative patterns and give them another twist. A more brain-friendly twist.

Set Yourself and your Inner Voice Apart

Mo Gawdat, a remarkable thinker and former Chief Business Officer at Google’s, in his book, Solve for Happy: Engineer Your Path to Joy, he proposes an algorithm based on an understanding of how the brain takes in and processes joy and sadness. Part of this algorithm acknowledging your inner critic and understanding that you are not your negative thoughts. Then the path to success and joy is open.

How can You achieve it? With an open-mind, of course and a bit of humour! First step is to give a name to your Inner Voice - it is your friend and as any friend, it has a name - and start speaking to it or ague. But let it know that You are in charge, of Yourself, of your non native language.

We give it a name because it is commonly believed that our thoughts in our brains are Me talking to Me. As Neuroscience shows and as Gawdat further explains in his book, our brain has a biological function of looking at the world around us, making sense of it, and turning it into thoughts,”, so we shouldn’t then incorporate those thoughts and equate them with our whole being.

Once You actually realise that your Brain is a third party, having a name, you start building a friendship and making a deal with it. Afterwords, everything is allowed, even positive thoughts, everything is changing and You are taking over. Brains are constantly looking for what's negative, what’s wrong with life, but those thoughts are presented to You and You are in charge. As a next step, You can take those thoughts and try to find the useful side, the positive aspects, or something more joyful in the picture Your brain is painting.

Clear the Space for a New Kind of Narrative

Once you have started to clear the space and draw a clear line between Yourself and your negative self-talk, you’ll be creating space for a new kind of narrative with yourself. It’s a really good time to start becoming more intentional with the way you speak to Yourself and fill up your system with positive thoughts that will prime you to face the world, as a proficient or independent non native speaker channel positive energy, simply feel joyful and take bold steps towards your leadership, business or career goals.

Practice Journaling and Mediation

One of the most efficient technics are journaling and meditation. You can start your morning by putting down in your agenda or journal some positive affirmations: Every positive step I take in my English, in French increases my chances in my life, business, career, leadership. I embody great speaking potential for succes., and, in the evening, write down 2 or 3 things that you are grateful for because of your non native language.

Despite all these, sometimes things will get wrong and Your Inner Panic Voice will creep in again. And running away for ever is not a solution. Or being paralysed, keep staying in your corner and listening to your inner voice. Rather try to acknowledge it and spend some time listening to your Friend. Similar to meditation: you sit, in silence, and you observe your thoughts. As most of the time we do not listen to our Brains, it is like a white noise and this good friend tries to alert you from time to time.

Build like a ritual when meeting this friend and give it a name. Set in your agenda a time to meet this friend, like ”Meeting my friend X.” Focusing on the present moment and on mindfulness helps you to redirect your focus from what is happening in your brain around your communication and your potential in French or English.

Mindfulness is a very personal pursuit. And if you are not into meditation, You can focus on breathing or taking a walk in a park, in a forest to talk with Your friend. I am not into meditation, but I am very much into walking, so I do this talk with a cappuccino in my hand.

Get Curious

Curiosity increases the level of dopamine in our brain. When we explore and satisfy our curiosity, our brain floods the body with dopamine, which makes us feel happier.

And now, that we’ve established that our brain is a third party and we’re not our thoughts, start observing the way your brain functions like a curious external observer. Are there certain situations, environments or people ( people you meet for the first time, superiors, native speakers, etc) that trigger your mind to act out and your inner critic to become extra loud with the negative talk?

Maybe past experiences when you felt that your French or English let you down are emerging! Or maybe, as a child, you were told not to speak. Or during a meeting! Or that you are not good at languages! Note down those mental triggers and work towards on cutting them down from your communication in French or English. Your life and your performance will definitely improve.

By becoming the Sherlock Homes of your own mind, you gain control over it and set rules and boundaries and take steps forward in avoiding letting your negative narrative to write the script of your communication as a non native speaker.

Ready to conquer your Inner Critic and elevate your communication proficiency and confidence? Let's work together to reshape your mindset and unlock your true potential as a proficient non-native speaker. Reach out for a complimentary session and take the first step towards effective communication and professional success. Let's rewrite your narrative and amplify your voice!