#Housewives Matter

I've written before about women of privilege, for example women in technology and their trials and tribulations, the lack of salary equity and how they burn out faster due to insensitive work cultures where work-life balance is not honored. 

I've written about Millennial women in Asia, whom I care deeply about in their journey in becoming leaders of the new world and where they are pressured to get married young, or risk being labeled by their society and even their government. 

But these are women full of opportunity, hope, education and the foundations of freedom, people on their way to self-actualized lifestyles and navigating the negotiation of privilege, compared to some women. 

There's another group of women I care about. They makeup what some are calling a silent epidemic in modern India. They may be forced into marriages and find in-laws who may even bully them. Yes, this is an Indian story. 

They may not have many options, or much opportunity or feel like they are valued as people but rather as women. They may spend their days serving others with little leisure or opportunity to develop themselves as a unique person. 

Why do Housewives in India have such a High Suicide Rate

What I am talking about, is the fact that 17% of suicides in India are housewives, compared to for instance, only 3% are farmers. Farmers committing suicide, that's vaguely familiar from the world media reports. But why, is nobody talking about the housewives?  Typically male suicides far outweigh women taking their own lives. 

How can we claim to care about the state of women, women's rights, women's empowerment and not notice this. How can we remain silent over issues where there is clearly a problem. 

#Housewives matter too. India's population is set to overtake China's by around 2022, just six years from now. 51.4% of female suicides in India, are actually house-wives. Why are their lives being made so difficult, that they would consider this their option of choice?

So long as arranged marriages exist, what happens to the quality of the life of the woman? When caste, religion, economy, profession and value of a woman has a certain "marriageability" value, can we be surprised some housewives are miserable or feel they have no way forward? Is it ethical to continue these practices if we deeply care about the potential of every girl, young woman and their future in India, no matter how poor, no matter how rural the village in which they live may be?

So while we debate women of privilege (on LinkedIn typically), my heart sometimes wanders to the women we often don't think about. Women who can't afford to be ambitious, who don't know what it's like to be literate, who don't yet and may never know what the internet is. While I live in a country where aboriginal suicide rate is very high, somehow my heart keeps going back to women in India who don't even have a voice. 

If more than 20,000 housewives took their lives in India in 2014, compared to only 5,650 farmers, who should get the press, what is the real story? The #Housewives matter, 250% more suicides than the farmers. But the media portrays the farmers as the great victims. 20,000 housewives killing themselves each year since 1997, that's 500,000 women. That a half a million. This doesn't count untold stories of suffering and miserable lives without any standard of quality of living we'd accept or want for our daughters, in fact, we'd be horrified if our grandmothers experienced this. 

Housewives #matter, they take their lives 11 per 100,000 people, in India. This is about triple that of Canadian women. 

• Little attention do this issue, showing poor housewives and their lives are valued less. 
• Higher rates in states such as Maharashtra, Pondicherry, Tamil Nadu, Madhya Pradesh, Kerala, Karnataka, Andhra Pradesh and Goa, why?
• Why is the high suicide rate among this group mean about these societies?
• What can we do to change this?

Marriage is supposed to protect individuals from hardship?

At least according to research in western societies. If married people are less likely to kill themselves, why is it so much higher among this group? Why is India an outlier, an anomaly in this? And what does it mean to women? The common woman, the women who was not not lucky to be born into a developed country or be born into a rich family. 

A study published in the medical journal The Lancet in 2012 showed that suicide rate in Indian women aged 15 years or older is more than two and a half times greater than it is in women of the same age in high-income countries, and nearly as high as in China.

Risks of Suicide

1. Higher in the first decade of marriage (aged 30-45)
2. Higher in women who are literate
3. Higher in smaller families 
4. Higher in women who have more exposure to media 
5. Lower in women who are from more traditional states
6. Lower in families that are more extended (e.g. in the more traditional states)

Some believe that the changing role of the family in India is creating situations that can work against younger women who must still adapt to out-dated models of how their lives are not in their own control. 

• Conflict with the spouse, that have no recourse
• Conflicts with the parents (e.g. higher educated daughter in law with the mother of the husband)

In one study by Joanne Moller, higher educated women were more likely to persuade their husbands to forge their own nuclear families when such conflict does occur but what happens to the less educated women?

One third of Urban suicides in India are housewives. #housewives matter

Gender Discrimination 

What if women don't have equal rights and are trapped into a difficult system of caste and arranged marriage or do not have supportive spouses that conflicts with their own dreams and aspirations?

What if these women become depressed over the lack of freedom of their situations? Now say, there aren't adequate counselors or even medical facilities to treat their depression? Now factor in social stigmas against "mental illness". What do we expect to happen to these housewives?

• Why would the media ignore the issue?
• Lack of public engagement with the "invisible gender" and "desperate housewives" story, true or false?

Related Causes of Housewife Suicide In India 

• India's patriarchal system 
• Family background (psychiatric, genetic and immediate environmental triggers) 
• Marital dissatisfaction 
• Torture for dowry 
• Domestic violence 
• Economic difficulties (increase risk) 
• Stigma around women discussing depression and mental health issues
• Lack of support when experiencing suicidal ideation

How does Housewife suicide in India make you react?