The House of Quarrelsome Parents: How Belarus Mirrors Our Darkest Myths

For more than three decades, Belarus has been held in the iron grip of Alex, a figure whose name reveberates through history like a half-forgotten tune – sometimes as a father, sometimes as a tyrant. His story, and the story of Belarus, are inseparable. They unfold together like an ancient myth replayed on the modern stage, a reflection of wounds deeper than politics and questions more profound than elections.

This is not an article about political strategies or opposition tactics. It is a story about us: about the myths we live by, the archetypes that guide us, and the way our personal and collective psyches are interwoven. Alex is not just a man; he is a archetype, the materialization of unresolved traumas, and the embodiment of our deepest collective fears and desires.

The Father We Fear Yet Follow

Alex, who has ruled for 34 years, emerged from a childhood marked by stigma and struggle. Born an illegitimate child, branded with the cruel word?▋▋▋▋▋▋▋▋, he grew up in a world that denied him belonging. His fatherless upbringing in rural Belarus mirrored the nation’s own fractured identity — a land often shaped by outsiders, lacking the continuity of an inherited name, language, and culture.

When Alex ascended to power in 1994, the country, like him, was searching for stability and recognition. Belarus was reeling from the collapse of the Soviet Union, with families fragmented, savings evaporated, and futures uncertain. In this chaos, Alex presented himself as a?Ba?ka?(Father), promising to protect, provide, and lead. And yet, his reign has been defined by the same duality that defined his own life: both nurturing and punishing, protective and tyranical.

It is no coincidence that Alex’s rule mirrors the structure of a dysfunctional family. His state operates like a household dominated by an overbearing father – demanding loyalty, controlling resources and punishing dissent. This dynamic is not confined to politics. It replicates itself in workplaces, communities, and even families across Belarus. Those who oppose Alex’s authoritarianism often find themselves unconsciously replicating his methods in their own spheres of influence

Archetypes and the Oedipal Dilemma

To understand this pattern, we must turn to psychology – specifically to Carl Jung’s archetypes and Sigmund Freud’s Oedipus complex. These are not abstract theories but lenses through which we can better understand our world. The Oedipus complex, at its core, is about the childs desire to confront and replace the father, to assert independence, and to carve out their own identity.

But what happens when the father is not just a person but an archetype? In Alex, we see the tyranical Father writ large — a figure who both nurtures and devours, who promises safety while demanding submission. To confront Alex directly is not merely to challenge a political leader, it is to confront the archetype of the Father itself

For many, this is an impossible task. It is easier to remain in the house of quarrelsome parents, locked in a false duality. In Belarus, this duality has taken the form of Alex versus Sviatlana – the strongman versus the caring mother. This dynamic mirrors the question every child is asked: “Whom do you love more, your father or your mother?” It is a false choice, one that keeps the nation in a perpetual state of psychological infancy, unable to move beyond the limitations of parental authority.

This psychological stasis mirrors an ancient Belarusian legend – that of the fern-flower. This mythical bloom, which appears only at midnight on Kupala Night, promises unlimited wisdom and the ability to understand the language of all living things. Yet finding it requires venturing alone into the darkest part of the forest, facing one's deepest fears, and resisting the seductive voices that would lead you astray. Many seek the flower, but most turn back, frigtened by the darkness or deceived by false lights. Like the citizens of Belarus, they choose the familiar discomfort of their current reality over the terrifying promise of transformation.

The Lost Identity and the Hidden Gods

Belarus, as a nation, carries its own unresolved trauma. Even its name – ?Belarus? – was not chosen by its people but given by outsiders. The true name, the one its inhabitants once called themselves, has been lost to history. This absence is not just a historical curiosity; it is a profound symbol of disconnection. Without a name, how can a people truly know themselves?

The suppression of the Byelarusian language and culture, the alignment with external powers, and the erasure of historical memory are all symptoms of this deeper wound. Just as Alex’s fatherlessness shaped his psyche, Belarus’ lack of an inherited identity has left it vulnerable to domination and control.

Yet the story does not end here. Beneath the surface of forgotten names and oppressed languages lies a deeper layer of identity: the true, lost, and forgotten deities of this land – ancient spirits of the forests, rivers, and skies. These are the same spirits that guard the fern-flower, testing those who dare to seek it. They are not mere relics of pagan folklore but symbols of an authentic, unbroken connection to the land itself. The rivers that carried the ashes of countless wars, the forests that sheltered both partisans and fugitives, and the skies that bore witness to tragedy and renewal alike –these are the eternal witnesses to our story.

To reconnect with these spirits is to remember what has been forgotten: that the identity of Belarus is not something imposed from above but something that rises from the soil, the water, and the wind. The deities of this land are not gods of power and control but guides toward authenticity, resilience, and renewal.

Breaking Free: The Fool's Journey

So, what is the way forward? To confront Alex head-on, to engage in endless battles of rhetoric and resistance, is to remain trapped in the same cycle. The true path lies not in external confrontation but in internal transformation.

Jung tells us that the archetype of the Fool — the one who dares to leave the safety of home – embarks on the journey of individuation. Like the seeker of the fern-flower, the Fool must venture into the forest at midnight, alone and uncertain. The magical flower blooms for just a moment, offering enlightenment to those brave enough to grasp it. But the journey itself – the willingness to face the darkness, to trust one's inner compass despite the disorienting voices of doubt and fear — is where the true transformation begins. This is the journey that Belarus, and every individual within it, must undertake

This journey begins with each of us. It requires us to look inward, to confront our own unresolved conflicts, and to recognize the ways in which we perpetuate the very dynamics we oppose. It is a call to step out of the shadow of the Father, to leave the house of quarrelsome parents , and to venture into the unknown.

New Myth for Belarus

Belarus’ story is not yet written. The cycle of trauma and tyranny can be broken, but it requires a shift in perspective – a recognition that the battle is not between Alex and Sviatlana, or East and West, but within ourselves.

When we understand that Alex is not just a man but a mirror, we begin to see the path forward. The fern-flower legend teaches us that true power – the kind that transforms rather than dominates – can only be found by those willing to venture into the darkness of their own psyche. By healing our own wounds, we contribute to the healing of the collective. By rejecting false dualities, we create space for true dialogue and growth.

This is the challenge and the opportunity before us: to move beyond the myths of the past and to create a new story, one that honors the true deities of this beautiful land and finally gives voice to its people.

The journey will not be easy, but it is the only way forward. It is time to leave the house. It is time to find the lost Word. It is time to grow up

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