Horrible Bosses

Imagine that your father regularly beat your mother to a bloody pulp.

And he molested you.

Your mother watched him do it and said nothing out of fear that he’d beat her again. She was willing to watch you suffer so that she didn’t have to.

You tried to tell the neighbors, but no one would believe you. Your family put on such a perfect image in public that no one could fathom the atrocities that went on in private.

Your parents had 100% control of your life, which left you powerless.

But no matter how horrible your childhood was, you could leave it behind when you became a self-supportive adult. The minute you left home, you had 100% control over your life and your parents were powerless over you.

No matter how horrible it was, your past doesn’t determine your future unless you let it.

Now imagine that you work for someone who’s a horrible boss and a terrible person.

He’s sleeping with four of his employees (all of whom are married), and you’re sure he does drugs at work because of the white powder you’ve seen in a glass vial in his desk. And while you’re not positive, you have a strong suspicion he’s guilty of malfeasance of company funds.

What would you do?

A woman from Knoxville who attended my seminar last week described this scenario and asked what to do.

While the obvious answer is to leave, she wasn’t ready to take that step – even though there are plenty of good jobs out there.

As easy as it is to judge her for staying in that situation, it’s a common quirk of human nature. No matter how bad a situation may be, staying’s easier than leaving. The old saying that therapists use is “I know I live in Hell. But at least I know the streets by name”.

Now imagine that you’re a supervisor who works for a boss that isn’t sleeping around, embezzling, or doing drugs. But he’s a doormat who let’s his employees get away with too much, doesn’t back you up when you try to hold people accountable, and micromanages. He’s a nice guy, but a terrible manager.

What would you do in that scenario?

Unfortunately, you might need to leave that job as well. While this situation isn’t as bad as the one in Knoxville, the aftermath could last just as long.

This is because the bad management habits of your boss will eventually rub off on you. Even after he leaves or you leave, those habits can follow you forever.

If you work for a boss who’s a bad manager and has poor leadership skills, you’ll never grow as a manager and develop your own leadership skills.

In Servant Leadership,

Glenn Shepard

P.S. For proof that a horrific childhood doesn’t prevent a great adulthood, look at Elizabeth Smart. Abducted from home at 14, she was held prisoner and repeatedly raped for nine months. But today, she’s a brave, strong, and inspirational commentator on ABC News. How befitting her last name is.

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