Hop on the Trend Train? Only if You Know the Destination

Have you heard about the trend, "Demure" and "Mindful"

We’ve all seen the latest trend sweeping across social media: “demure” and “mindful” fall—taking over from the bolder, carefree “brat summer.” But this trend isn’t just about swapping crop tops for cardigans. It carries a deeper message that many women, particularly transwomen, confront daily: Am I feminine enough?

From the boardroom to the sidewalk, we constantly navigate how we’re perceived—adjusting our appearance and demeanor to feel safe, accepted, and respected. Unfortunately, women still face scrutiny, especially when it comes to what we wear. Not so fun fact, that women are more likely to be wearing sweatpants when assaulted. Adding salt to the common question to survivors of SA: "What was she wearing?" This trend highlights just one of the many uncomfortable truths we must confront.

The Cultural Context

On the outside, this trend is very "cutesy", but when you dig deeper, you'll find the core. Many times femme presenting people are being "mindful" & "demure" to mitigate how others perceive us in public. I will not begin to explain a transwoman experience, as that is not my story to share. However, I can share the statistics.

30% of trans people report being physically attacked or assaulted because of their gender identity (Williams Institute, 2021).

As the trend of "mindful femininity" gained traction online, brands eagerly jumped into the conversation. However, they missed the mark by treating it as a matter of aesthetics, focusing on whether our looks or outfits are deemed attractive. The real issue goes far deeper—it's about the policing of our appearance in certain spaces to avoid harassment and address the legitimate safety concerns that women, especially trans women, face when we aren't seen as "mindful" or "demure" enough in how we present ourselves.

Brands have failed to grasp the core of why this trend started. Why? Because they failed to recognize the cultural weight behind the trend—particularly its importance to women and transwomen.

Companies Assess: Is this your train?

Before your company dives into the latest trending topic, it’s essential to ask: Does this trend truly align with who we are? Jumping on a movement without understanding or supporting the communities it represents can lead to a quick backlash, damaging your credibility. So, how can brands engage with trends authentically, instead of cannibalizing them for clout?

Here’s the roadmap:

• Understand the cultural context: Trends don’t emerge from thin air. They’re shaped by real experiences, struggles, and societal shifts. Do your research before you dive in.
• Align with your brand’s core values: Not every trend will (or should) align with your company’s mission. If this trend doesn’t resonate with your brand identity, it’s okay to sit it out.
• Show real support, not just aesthetics: It’s easy to post about being “mindful” or “demure,” but what are you doing to support the women and transwomen these ideas resonate with? Your actions should back up your messaging.
• Collaborate with authenticity: Instead of jumping on a trend, work with the creators and communities driving it. This builds trust, shows genuine support, and allows your brand to contribute meaningfully.

So, before you throw your hat in the ring, take a step back and ask: Is this trend the right fit for us? Because when you’re mindful about your brand’s involvement, you can turn a fleeting trend into a lasting connection.

What are your thoughts? Have you seen brands knock it out of the park, or completely miss the point? Let’s chat!

Personal Note from the Author: Respect isn’t something you need to "earn" or conditional based on what you wear. If you’re in a space where you aren’t respected as a person, no amount of compromise will change that. Instead of trying to please an unworthy audience, find a place where you can be your authentic self. If someone—or an organization—is treating you this way, don’t hesitate to take your beautiful talent somewhere they’ll be truly valued.

I’m including Jool’s image here so the next time you’re on TikTok, you can engage, like, and comment. I’ve been a fan of her content long before she went viral with this video, and I’m beyond thrilled and proud that this trend has helped her fund the gender-affirming surgery she, and every trans person, deserves. It brings tears to my eyes thinking about how this trend has transformed her life. I wanted to ensure she gets the proper credit in this article. Tik Tok @joolieannie