Honoring My Mother on Mother's Day

Mother's Day is a time to honor and celebrate the women who have shaped us into the people we are today. For me, that woman was my mother - a smart, educated, and strong advocate for women's rights during Bhutto's era in Pakistan. But more than that, my mother possessed an unparalleled level of maturity, knowledge, presence of mind, and wisdom that I have never encountered in anyone else.

Mother, if only I could express.

The depth of my gratitude and love.

You have shaped the person I am.

Guiding me with grace from above.

As a child, my mother would share with me the stories of her family and her political efforts for the women of Haripur Hazara, in northern Pakistan. She would offer her insights on life, religion, politics, and the works of Iqbal's poetry, and we would talk for hours. Whenever I felt down or needed a boost of inspiration, she would read to me and my brother from the Bang-e-Dara. Hearing these powerful verses about perseverance and resilience helped shape my worldview and it was through these conversations that she instilled in me the values and life lessons that have shaped me into the person I am today.

But when I was 19, tragedy struck, and my mother passed away from a brain hemorrhage. Despite the loss, I am eternally grateful for the time I had with her and the lessons she taught me.

Your love has been unwavering.

A beacon through life's highs and lows.

With your wisdom and guidance

You've helped me grow and glow.

Here are some of the invaluable lessons my mother taught me that continue to guide me today:

1. Family First - My mother instilled in me the belief that family comes first. She showed me how to care for my family, how to make a house into a home, and how to be loving, kind, and strong. She taught me that it is essential to give your family your full attention and to let them know how much you miss them when they are away. We always had dinner together, shared our daily experiences, discussed school activities, and planned our vacations.
2. Always Look Forward - My mother taught me to look forward and not dwell on the past. She shared her past experiences and the lessons she learned from them, cherished the beautiful moments but never let her past define her. She always had her eyes fixed on the future.
3. Face the Storms of Life with Smiles - My mother taught me to keep smiling even during the life's storms. She believed that happiness could be found in difficult times, and she always wanted to be remembered with a smile after her death, not with tears.
4. Have High Self-Esteem - My mother was my biggest cheerleader. She supported my dreams and ambitions, listened to my complaints, and worries, and taught me to believe in myself. Her motivational conversations and hugs are still with me today.
5. Never Give Up on Your Dreams - My grandfather instilled in his daughters the values of strength, confidence, and independence. He taught them to choose their battles and fight them on their own. My mother lived an independent life until she married and had to move to a new city, give up her political activities and job. Despite these challenges, she devoted herself to caring for my father's family and raising my brother and me. She often spoke about her aspirations, and she supported my father's business decisions while never giving up on her own dreams of making a difference in people's lives.

Years later, she founded a school for underprivileged children, providing them with free uniforms, textbooks, and tuition. Her message to me was clear: never give up, persevere towards your dreams, put your trust in Allah, and stand up for yourself while being mindful of others' feelings.

1. Always Help Others - My mother was a giving person who helped those in need. She taught me that life is not just about receiving but also about giving. She volunteered her time, money, and goods to help others, and her selflessness has inspired me to follow in.
2. Live and let live - In Pakistani society, personal boundaries are often not respected, especially when it comes to family matters. However, my mother instilled in us the importance of staying out of other people's lives and not letting others interfere in ours. I can vividly recall a time when I was gossiping about a girl in my college over the phone with a friend, and my mother overheard me. She expressed her disappointment and reminded me that Allah does not approve of such behavior. My mother always emphasized that whatever we do to others, it will eventually come back to us. Therefore, it is crucial to be humble, avoid talking about others, and focus on our own issues.

I owe my strength and confidence.

To the lessons you've taught me so well.

You are my greatest inspiration.

My dearest mother, I will forever tell.