In Honor of Our Graduates: 5 Lessons for Life

One of my favorite spring sights in New York is seeing a wave of graduates and family members joyfully burst out of a church or theater as the ceremony ends to start celebrating.

Their beaming smiles as they look forward to the future always inspire me. And when I reflect on my own journey, there are five things I wish I’d realized from the start:

Lesson #1: I learned the most important things in life before I even went to high school -- from my parents, Otis and Rosie Brown.

I come from modest but loving beginnings. I was born in Rochester, N.Y. My father was a warehouse worker and my mother was an educator. When I was very young, my parents, two brothers and I moved to Texas with everything we owned in our car -- which means there was not much.

But I learned from a young age the importance of education and also of doing whatever we set out to do with excellence. My father from a young age taught me to reach for the moon because even if you miss, you’ll be among the stars.

My mother was a teacher, and she expected our schoolwork to be done well. But she also taught us kindness in our faith – that if we saw someone at school who had no lunch, to share ours.

Lesson #2: It pays to stay intellectually curious and embrace opportunities. You have to always ask the next question, and the next question. And then the one after that.

You don’t know what you don’t know, so you always have to remain humble, open and curious to take advantage of disruptive opportunities that open your eyes to possibilities.

Staying open to those possibilities may even change or accelerate your entire trajectory, as it did in my life. I believe in the power of information. The couple who told me about an internship program called INROADS provided the information I needed to unlock my understanding of and access to Corporate America. It led me to Fannie Mae, where I discovered my passion for financial inclusion and financial health, and eventually to a career at JPMorgan Chase and now TIAA.

It’s important to recognize that within your career, when you take your shot, there will be highs, and there will be lows. Even then, ask the question: “What’s the lesson here?” Ask it even when it’s painful.

Be thankful for those learnings, those tough times that can set you up for something great.

Lesson #3: Mentorship is all around us. Seek it out and be open and willing to receive it.

Sometimes we define mentorship too narrowly, waiting to have an executive make time for us. Please know that your title is rented and your character is owned. So make sure you show up and show your character. Rely on the character in other people that connects to what you need to develop or see as a reminder. And seek out that character, even if it’s through reading about people you admire in biographies.

When I started out at Fannie Mae, the secretaries were some of my best mentors. Embrace that guidance and become who you are meant to be.

Lesson #4: I am enough – you are enough. So believe in yourself and what you bring. So often, we get stuck in these mental gymnastics, wondering if we can measure up, if we’re ready to take a risk.

Embrace unapologetically your authenticity. Know that your voice is necessary and required. Believe in your story. Own your story. And when you own your story, your boldest, super-dope self shines through. We absolutely must bring our personal perspective based on our diverse experiences to the table. That’s when the magic happens.

Find your purpose. Be unapologetic about it. Make a positive impact. And in the words of the late civil rights icon John Lewis, stay in good trouble.

Lesson #5: When you start a new professional journey, always pay yourself first. Take full advantage of your benefits. Ensure your strong financial future.

My father always says, “People see your glory, but they don’t know your story.” I know firsthand the impact when a family is doing the best it can -- but the best is not sufficient. I understood the power of savings early on, and the power of compounding – and how not saving enough can impact your family’s life.

Just after college I was helping my father read his retirement statements. Imagine how it felt for the daughter to have to tell her father, her hero who did so much, that he didn’t have enough to be able to retire. He hadn’t contributed to his 401(k) because he didn’t think that benefit was for him. He took my advice and, somehow, he caught up.

So for me, it’s personal. But we all have to start talking about saving because our country is facing a real crisis: 40 percent of all U.S. households are expected to run out of money in retirement. Women still have 30 percent less income in retirement than men. And 83 percent of older Americans who are Black do not have enough savings to retire.

We have to close this gap: How do we take care of our mothers and fathers when our sons and daughters can’t yet take care of themselves? It is our collective responsibility to break the cycle. We must right this economic injustice. If we don’t, it means yet another generation of children will have to carry that burden. We can, and we will, do better.

So for those of you who are graduating this season, hear me when I say: I believe we can be the change. We can do it through the power of one, together as allies, lifting each other up as we climb. And if you walk into a room and ever feel like you do not belong, take that breath and know that you stand on the shoulders of giants. The price has already been paid.

?Never ever dim your light. Every step forward, every achievement, is for them, it’s for you -- and it is for future generations of Americans.

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