Hoad’s Thoughts on a Thursday Series Episode 4: The Golden Campaign, The Workshop That Never Was. Part 2/2...
Hello Linkedin!
Well, I'm getting these articles out now at such a nice pace, I don't think I'll keep drawing attention to it. I hope to do seven in total, that would be around 18,000 words, the same length as a standard University Dissertation. I'm making it my own personal challenge and my way of celebrating the hopeful end of lockdown! Look's like they are coming out weekly now too. And, I've just crossed the halfway point with this one so there's no stopping me now!
It's pretty much been my therapy during these crazy days. I seem to have a new idea for an article every hour and I'm glad I can share some of them with you.
Oh, by the way, look at this video here:
I had to record it off my phone because I couldn't find it on Youtube. It's from the HBO show "Succession" that started in 2018. Everyone I know is talking about it right now. Scary right? New York business dudes smudging their workplaces? Clearly they read my first article and stole my idea!
The Quest Continues...
Anyway, I'll get right to the second part of The Golden Campaign, as not to take time away rambling on. I can do that at the bottom of the article, along with some rantings. And for those just joining, this is a part two of two. The first one is here and I recommend you read it first so you understand the context of this article.
So, here are the two other Clans, both without videos, unfortunately.
Thieves
"Some pay a lot of gold for their marketing campaigns. But not the Thieves. The world owes them a living! Whether it's high jacking PR events or posting meme-worthy material about their own businesses, in the hopes it will go viral, the Thieves have no shame when it comes to fighting dirty. Like the brutish Warriors, some even make trick products to troll the masses. They are some of the smartest marketers in the world and everything seems like a game to them."
Special Area:
Meme marketing
Behind the scenes:
The overlaying theme of the Theif is to not spend a dime on marketing by winning some press via memes and PR stunts. The strongest case for this is with Tesla's Cybertruck, shared below as an example. I'd want to see a lot of ideas about how these products could be marketed with a zero dollar budget using some smart, out-of-the-box lateral thinking. Even going as far as to use nefarious tactics like "clickbait".
This could very well be the hardest Clan to play. I had fears that not many people would understand how to use meme marketing as it is quite niche. Hopefully, my examples and following discussion would make it clearer.
Examples shown on PowerPoint for discussion in the morning:
Dizzee Rascal steals David Blaine's limelight
UK Rapper crashes Blaine's big finale in London and even gets a music video out of it too!
Tesla gets 250,000 preorders for a truck using no marketing budget, just memes.
For some reason, Gucci thought it be a good idea to make blackface jumpers just to get some free press (though they denied it.)
Enchanter
"Using their platforms of influence, Enchanters are masters of mind control. They are the self-proclaimed tase makers and have a knack for making peoples minds up for them. "Monkey see, monkey do." is their motto. The Kings and Queens of aspirational lifestyles viewed through a screen and they know how to leverage their army of followers. Social Media is their world and they certainly know how to use it.
Special Area:
Influencer marketing
Rant Time
As per the first article, I really wouldn't want to get into the topic of influencer marketing anymore. I think it really has had its time, honestly I do. Despite the daily newsletters from influencer agencies telling me it hasn't. After such things as the Black Lifes Matter protests and following race riots and Covid-19, the idea of someone only using themselves and their carefully arranged lifestyle as a platform isn't something interesting to many everyday people now. And even if I'm wrong and it isn't over, it's not something I'd personally stand by and wouldn't want to endorse it further. If 2020 has taught us anything, its the End of the Egotist.
This photo came across my Instagram explore page a while ago and sums up my disdain for Influencers. At first, there seems to be nothing wrong with it, just one of a million "lifestyle" photos on social media.
But look to the eyes. Nothing in there. It just isn't convincing me that this person isn't just taking a photo as some obligation to her Instagram. When you get older like me, you start to notice tiny details like this. You can tell when someone is really smiling from their eyes. This just screams insincerity.
A Photo like this reinforces my feelings that this is all fake marketing and not nearly as impactful as it once was. And this is why there is no further development or links for the "Enchanter". It just feels so out of touch in a now more grown-up world.
Ok, back to the topic in hand...
The Queen and the Three Magic Items
The (very rough) idea for the game element in the workshop was to have some far away Queen contact the four Clans on their ship, floating out in space, and offer them a chance to be saved. The Clans start the game on a spaceship due to their homeworld being destroyed, as per the short intro video from the last article (why or how this predicament came about would be left unknown.)
But this Queen would save only one Clan. To decide switch. they would have to market three magic products to prove their style of marketing is the best (Outrage, Empathic, Meme or Influencer). Then the Queen would beam them off the ship and to her homeworld to work for her full time on a project called "The Golden Campaign". This would be the end of the game.
I thought of this quest as being similar to the TV show The Apprentice (more the UK one with Alan Sugar, less than the over the top US one with you-know-who). Like the show, before the winner makes it to the top and wins the deal, they must prove their worth in a number of small tasks.
I was even thinking of adding a final twist at the end and then have the winning team fight one another to get a final, single winner. Very Double Dragon. Not sure if I would have had this in the final version but it would have been fun!
The Three Magic Items
At this point, let's do a quick recap. We have our Clans now (Warrior, Priest, Theif and Enchanter) and each one represents an area of marketing (Outrage, Empathic, Meme or Influencer) and the game is to use your area of marketing to market three products or "Magic Items" using the time after lunch and a flip chart to sketch out your ideas. Before the last break, I'd send photos back of the team's ideas to idealo and my Team Lead, Andrea, would judge them best she could. During the afternoon, I would introduce each item one by one, stopping the teams after thirty minutes to show us what they had come up with, have a little talk about it, introduce the next Magic Item and keep everyone's spirits going. Good, fast-paced energy is crucial to the success of a workshop like this.
Each product would be introduced via a quick, funny video in the same vein as the ones before and I'd hand out an info sheet with some parts of the descriptions below (I never completely finished the texts) about the products unique features. This extra information would hopefully inspire some ideas and angles for each team's exclusive form of advertising.
And here we have the three:
Soda Pop
This is a very sugary, bright green soda, made with a bio, sustainable sweetener (minitour blood) and a brand new biodegradable bottle using low tech orc technology. With it being aimed at orcs, it might have alcohol added to it. I would leave that up to the teams if it fits with their message.
The product has zero health benefits and could be harmful if too many are drunk within an hour, but it gives the drinker amazing strength and they can move twice as fast for a few minutes. Useful in battle!
The company making this product, Ork-o-Pops is a good, profitable family-owned orcish company that has been making soft drinks for years. Many people know and like them, and they have a pretty clean record with the press.
Expenisve Elf Glasses
This one would be deliberately very polarizing as the company making these would have a super aggressive, confrontational angle.
The designer "Aerin MaleTears" (pictured) calls herself the High-Elf Queen Feminist. When she isn't making the worlds most expensive glasses, she is on Twitter tweeting "Kill all Men" or making response videos to her sworn enemy, Sargon of Akkad.
Of course, the glasses are so beautiful, one could cry at the almost magical work(wo)manship but the price is out of this world. Also, this bitchy elf has a lot of negative press connected to her (even just calling yourself a High-Elf is seen as problematic to some) and she loves to make trouble! Though she does donate a lot of money each year to woman based charities.
Dragon Fire Laptop
At first look, this laptop is unbelievably high tech. The best of the best! Solid gold, with just about every single advancement in the world of laptops imaginable.
It's almost too good to be true and it should easily be able to sell itself. It's an astonishingly fair price for a top of the range laptop. Even the fact it's real gold doesn't change the price too much.
So what's the catch? Well, the dragons that run the factories have enslaved most of the gnomes in the caves that surround the company, up in the Mountain of Fire. They now force them to manufacture these computers all day and night, otherwise, they will end up on the dragon's dinner plate. This is why the price is so low as the gnomes are made to work for free.
Spicy Hot Takes
To quote a line from Game of Thrones, "A Dothraki wedding without at least three deaths is considered a dull affair."
And whilst I wouldn't want anyone to die at my workshop, well not again (joke!), I would consider it a little dull unless someone challenged some of the products and ideas, even within their own team. The workshop's main aim is to be fun and a little different but also thought-provoking. Maybe this is down to my mischievous nature, but I like to see some heated discussions.
We live in a world where we consume so many "evil" products without even thinking (The dragon's laptop was clearly a piss-take of Apple and the sweatshops they still use.) When thinking about these products, I'd want the teams to even start to question marketing in general. How much is their conscience worth? Maybe this would be getting too deep for a workshop designed to be enjoyed, but I felt strongly that morals and personal beliefs should be challenged from time to time.
Alignments
A huge mechanic to the game of Dungeons and Dragons, the main inspiration for this workshop, is Alignments. Whether or not you want to play as good or bad, essentially. Since this workshop was going to be somewhat of a roleplaying game, the teams were free to be as crazy as they wanted with the ideas in a judgment-free zone. In reflection, this could have been a disaster.
I never met the twelve people that signed up, so I didn't know their backgrounds but one Social Justice Warrior type and I knew they would be some fire. I have my own beliefs (Centre Left) but I'd keep the day political neutral and open for all ideas. This was a day for learning after all and if you wanted to play a bad guy, then you were free to do it.
But with the world-changing so drastically, even in the last few weeks alone, I'm not sure if the tone of this would work. Even the soda, which was the most innocent product, could have had racial issues with the orcs it was aimed at. You also have to be careful in this new, more adult world. In a way, I would love to see what would have happened if the whole workshop turned into a huge civil debate.
Summary
So, that's that! It's off my hard drive and out into the world! What did you all make if it? Would it have worked? I guess we will never know. The workshop itself has now become a legend. A part of a time that has vanished into history.
I think I've said everything I could on this topic and now it's time to start to think about the next one. Feels great to get it off my chest.
Stay safe, Linkedin wonderers!
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John xxx