The Hitchhikers Guide to Parenting, Partnering, Studying, Working and...Pandemying.

I made that up. "Pandemying" is not a proper word, but I think you will know what I mean. Living under the pandemic deserves its own word describing all-encompassing state of endurance, dont you think? Anyways, this is not what I wanted to write to you about today. I wanted to focus on something else.

Two years ago, I decided to pursue an LLM degree. So before you continue reading this article, I want to set the expectations right. This article is not about me celebrating that achievement, this article is about everything unseen and unspoken that happened behind the scenes of shining graduation ceremony. When I think about my LLM journey, I do not picture McEwan Hall or arresting appearance of The Old College of the University of Edinburgh; I see my son sleeping on my lap drunk with paracetamol as he is suffering from fever, I am touching his forehead with one hand, while I am typing my exam essay with the other. If you are thinking about pursuing master's degree while working full time and having a family, please continue reading. I hope what I am about to share helps you plan and prepare for what's ahead. Don't get me wrong, it is certainly enriching experience and I would do it again, however it requires careful planning and even more thoughtful execution. If you are not about to make similar decision, please stop reading here. I am sure there are far better uses of your time.

Choosing a program

Tip 1: Do your due diligence on post-graduate programs and understand what your objectives are in pursuing post-grad degree.

I have already shared that I had decided to pursue a master's degree in law. The reason why I stressed that is twofold: first of all because I weighed specialized master's degree against MBA or even executive MBA. To understand my thinking you should also know that my bachelor degree is engineering, and that I was already exposed to work in privacy and data protection. Therefore, it made more sense?to upgrade my engineering knowledge with specialized masters such as LLM, even more so as I was already working in the relevant field. MBA provides more generalist skill set necessary for business management, and I wanted to have a focus on subject matter expertise as a differentiating factor or shall I also say, competitive edge. This does not mean I excluded MBA from my future plans, on the contrary. It means that I have decided to prioritize. Therefore, depending on your bachelor's degree and your present subject matter expertise, you may want to do similar assessment. For example, it is possible that if you already have bachelor's degree in law you do not see an added value in pursuing an LLM and you go for MBA instead.?

Once field of study was clear, I had two other criteria I used to select a University and a program. First one I really had no choice or control over (at least not short term), as I have an engineering degree I had to find a law school which supports applicants with non-legal background for their post-grad studies. This already narrowed down the options significantly, as for example, KU Leuven, which would have been my first choice - at the time did not accept post-grad applicants without legal qualifications. Besides having excellent reputation for quality of legal study programs and being only one hour commute away , there was one other compelling reason?for me to choose KU Leuven - education days. I will explain why this is important in a different section below. I think I can finally stop lamenting for not being able to study at KU Leuven now :) Another objective that I had was to be able to continue working full time. The University of Edinburgh came as a leading candidate in the EU satisfying both requirements (fair, now I probably have to explore equivalence process).?

Full disclosure, online masters studies require a degree of self-discipline and sometimes masochism justified by insatiable hunger for knowledge. The University of Edinburgh has strong, research led LLM programs which are, as I wrote about before, led by academic staff who are not only globally recognized experts in their own fields, but equally empathic mentors. I chose 20-month LLM In Information technology law and felt honored that I got accepted to the program in autumn 2019. Little did I know COVID had different plans. Besides LLM in Information technology law you should also explore LLM in Innovation, technology and the law which is another excellent opportunity to learn about law and technology. Overall these types of programs are great fit for people who are interested in understanding the role technology plays in human society, and how it is vs how it should be regulated. Bridging that gap between law and tech is only sustainable if it is a two way bridge. And we need more people to walk it, so it becomes a habit and does not remain an exception. More and more universities are developing and offering multidisciplinary programs centered around social sciences of different digital phenomenons.?

Securing a buy-in from your stakeholders and some reactive maths

Tip 2: Name your stakeholders and get their buy-in; how can they support you?

This was not so straightforward and I will confess I did not think about this thoroughly before I got accepted. Some things you just figure out along the way and accept the risk to pay the price for potential lack of skill to execute on it. There were three forms of LLM in Information technology law with distinct duration: 12-month, 20-month and 36-month programs. Believe it or not, my brain instinctively used method of elimination: 12-month too aggressive, 36-month not serious enough. So I landed with 20-month program. I wish I could say that I did proactive analysis of what this meant for my daily agenda. I did not. 20-month program basically means 2 courses per semester, three semesters in total + the dissertation. On a weekly level each course demands between 20-25 hours in average, times two courses - brings us to around 50 hours per week. Or in different words, 100% increase of your work schedule. Scarry! Bur manageable. Trust me, just use Hermione's time turner and cut back on Netflix. I might have lied to my partner when I was presenting the estimated impact this will have on our life. Practically speaking, I studied 2 hours each morning, 3-4 hours each evening on a working day, plus around 16 hours in the weekends. For this reason, I am not entirely sure if COVID was a blessing or a curse. Still think I would deal easier with conscious cut-back on social life instead of not been given a choice to begin with.?

On the work front, I encountered nothing but support. It felt a bit awkward studying law while I was still in my engineering role (doubting looks in team meetings :), when instead of "0" or "1" you answer "maybe"), but persistence and perseverance pays off. It is good idea to put these things in writing with your manager, and check if your company is offering support for tuition fees. Setting the expectations right and communicating clearly with your team is a must, especially when it comes to limited availability during exam periods. Just after my second semester started, I was able to move into privacy position permanently (after two years of re-skilling, stretch assignment, internal rotations or secondments). There will be moments of doubt when you will be thinking your efforts to re-skill yourself are not getting and will not be recognized, but please keep going. Stay focused on your dreams, and work hard on your goals. More listening, reading and observing, less talking. This is true especially if you are interested in privacy and data protection, but do not have a legal background. The society needs people with diverse backgrounds to understand impact technology has on human rights. And don't be afraid of case summaries and briefs. They are perfectly reasonable. Just like mathematical proofs (I leave incompleteness theorems out of this).?

Education leave and PTO days

Tip 3: Determine the role of indirect stakeholders, i.e. government sponsored benefits?

Tip 4: Build a fitness plan. Calm your mind.

Flanders and other Belgian regions offer possibility of educational leave to employees (both full time and part time ) who want to pursue further training or education to improve their skills, also known as Vlaams opleidingsverlof. For example, I followed Dutch courses in the evenings two times a week for three hours some years back, and was granted around 10 education days in total per course, to ensure I have dedicated time apart from work to finish the course successfully. For a master's degree you would be allowed much more, however one important limitation is that the training must take place in Belgium as it is a government sponsored initiative. I found out about this only after I sent my email to HR, informing them that I got accepted to a post-graduate program and that I would like to start a procedure for getting access to education days. Their answer was rather unexpected, almost like Matrix Resurrections announcement.?

Practically speaking, I realized that I will be using my PTO days to cover exam terms for two full years. With a contemporary unwritten threat to existence of work/life balance and normalization of long working hours, not being able to disconnect for longer period of time was a serious threat to mental health. "Holiday blues" just developed another dimension, as coming back tired from a PTO became something I had to announce more than once to my work stakeholders - I turned "Enjoy your PTO" to "Goodluck with your exams". On the other hand, it prompted me to introduce regular, daily fitness regime. I fell in love with Pamela Reif, who is a famous fitness video blogger with variety of exercise routines lasting only 15 minutes - from boxing cardios, over Christmas dancing with 80s beat to HIIT Ab workouts. She also has incredibly motivating Spotify playlist, though I admit her being Ed Sheeran fan played a decisive role in making me an addict of her channel. Who else secured "equals" tour tickets?

?Oh, BTW - I read Harry Potter for the first time during my last semester - it was a great way to calm my mind after extensive reading day. I have this thing when my mind is accelerated that I can't sleep. The more I got mentally engaged, the more I craved chocolate, fantasy and magic. Obliviate is pretty scary spell, don't you think? Maybe that's because I always found consolation in the fact that knowledge is something no one can take away from you, a personal fear created by war years in the Balkans.

To conclude, ensure you check what kind of "educational leave" if any, your government provides.

Changing parameters: New career opportunity and the pandemic, in reverse order

Tip 5: Have strategies ready to deal with unforeseen.

If all of this sounds like achievable in Sense8 cluster only, when pandemic hit I felt like I was trying to take on a Pr0tal Chamber as a total Portal n00b. Lockdown of March 2020 was the first time in a decade that I met desperation face to face. With kinder gardens closed and two parents working from home full time, I was afraid my 18 month old would start hating me. Juggling between WebEx meetings, cooking, diaper changing, playing duplo, studying, worrying about wellbeing of my family and friends scattered around the world - felt overwhelming and I was on a medical leave by mid-April. This was the second time during my tenure at Cisco that I felt mentally unfit to perform my duties, though this time around causes were not purely work related. I remember fondly vCoffee morning meetings my former manager started on a regular cadence. Those meetings were my escape from reality into getting to know my team mates through music, art, travel and dreams. Mayte, if you are reading this, may the force always be with you! I confess that one thing that bothered me the most during that period was the fact that our house would have been a challenge for a pro like Marie Kondo. There is a difference between brainstorming and housestorming, the former I am perfectly fine with.

Two medical leave weeks coincided with my first exam term. I remember vividly staring at an empty Word document wondering if it was easier to climb Mount Everest than to write two essays of 4000 words each of legal analysis I knew little about. First one was on the topic of Cyberkiosks introduced by Scotland Police, the second one was Kiobel v. Royal Dutch Petroleum case. The latter seemed especially intimidating due to its link to corporate accountability in context of human rights abuses. Whenever the obstacle would look insurmountable, I would always make progress by applying "divide and conquer" approach. Keeping my body fueled with daily runs and good food coupled with constant mental stimulation was not so difficult. I know finding motivation to keep moving may sound difficult, but inaction is going to take you where you do not want to go. It was then that I realized that Parenting, Partnering, Studying, Working and...Pandemying is not possible all at once. It is just one activity "too much".

On the plus side, I did not have to worry about missing all the birthdays, baptisms, weddings, baby showers, anniversary's, house warming parties, barbeques, promotions, graduations, blockchain token launches :) Our lives became fully digital.?

Another thing I did not anticipate was a career change in the course of my studies. That was a parameter that led to the perfect storm and severe impact on my relationship with the person closest to me. Stepping into EMEAR Privacy Officer role for a company such as Cisco was admittedly in my plans, possibly couple of years down the line. Thanks to my team, I experienced firsthand and for another first in my career, what it means to be given an opportunity based on potential and not on performance :) Hurrray for Cisco's CPO team for breaking the glass ceilings. BTW when I decided to solicit for the role, my intention was to benchmark myself against the skillset available in the market. Seems that I was also suffering from already famous "Men apply for a job when they meet only 60% of the qualifications, but women apply only if they meet 100% of them." I was also convinced I would be wasting my interviewers time and energy, so I thanked them for agreeing to do this for me (HBR article still true almost a decade after it was published). I remember Harvey Jang, Cisco's CPO and my current boss, calling me to tell me the team has decided to give me the role, my first thought was: "Frack, what am I going to do with my LLM?! I still have one semester to go. What if I decline. Panic!" My partner was less uncertain, though I reminded him of that moment every time we were not on speaking terms in 2021.

Anyways, lesson of this chapter is that you should be prepared for unexpected events which will destroy fragile balance - I love Serbian term for this "ocekujte neocekivano". Take that English efficiency :)

Understanding the "why"

Tip 6: Write down why you are doing this, so you can refer back to it in the dark times.

Tip 7: Share the knowledge.

In the end, you may be wondering why I did it. The answer is rather simple, I never felt more alive in my life. Before LLM, and I am not ashamed of confessing this, I was living in a filter bubble of my own creation. LLM showed me just how many things I do not know, and it got me to question what is my purpose and what I want my legacy to be. Its painful but rewarding to be outside of one's comfort zone. Getting exposed to the thoughts and works of John Ruggie and Julia Cohen literally changed my life. I just got so much food for my mind and soul, that all the tears and sweat were worth it. “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” - said Mendela. Would I do it again and make the same decisions as I made them if I knew what lies ahead - probably not. Assuming you cannot control "Pandemying" - what would you drop from "Partnering, Parenting, Studying and Working" list? My choice is clear. As I plan and prepare for my PhD (some 5 years down the line) - I want to do it full time. Still haven't really figured what that will look like. In the meantime, if you want to discuss privacy challenges in Connected mind applications or you are interested in data localization trends and their impact on human rights, or you just want to talk about how to solve Pr0tal chamber, please do reach out! I also want to hear other experiences and master adventures.

TL;DR

There is only one name on my master's degree, however it took an army of people offering their selfless support to make this possible every day for the past two years. Thank you, I unbreakably vow to make it worth your while.