Hit The Reset Button After A Narcissistic Relationship

After a relationship with a narcissist (or when you’re in the midst of a breakup with one), your head is tirelessly spinning, and your emotions are on a crazy roller coaster ride. It’s exhausting.

You get stuck in ruminating, and you feel the push-pull nightmare of the trauma bond. When will it end?

Hitting the “Reset Button” helps. This requires a dramatic shift in your environment and how you interact with it.

Go away somewhere, even if it’s to a friends house; hopefully in a location that offers different views or climate. (I enjoyed being at a friend’s house where there was a lovely scene in the yard: A wrought iron filigree bench among the trees and the grass.)

It was peaceful, and looked different than the same four walls and environment that I’d been looking at. And there’s something about different scenery, even if it’s something simple.

It gives you something new to focus on, and helps to take your mind off of the same old problems. It’s also a great time to turn off the phone and let go of the need to be connected to the internet and social media.

Also, setting boundaries and going “no contact” with a narcissist is a priority, because it’s part of breaking the trauma bond. It cuts the cord with them, and starts the healing process. (Although tools that help you go to a deep level of transformation will get you there faster.)

If you’re able to treat yourself and go to a place where you can be pampered, that’s even better. (Unfortunately we can come out of these relationships with our self worth at rock bottom, and either lacking funds or believing we don’t deserve to invest in our own pampering.)

Well, it’s time to change that point of view, because you deserve every ounce of being taken care of?—?particularly after the nightmare you went through. And if you somehow feel like it was your own fault, it’s time to let go of that belief too.

Loving yourself and building your self worth requires doing something different. You can’t improve on it if you’re still treating yourself the same way; especially with as little respect as the narcissist showed you.

If you keep doing things the same way, you’ll keep getting the same results.

It’s time to let go of being stuck in the same physical, mental and emotional environment. And when you press that reset button, a more calm feeling will come over you.

You won’t be caught up in the same repeating loop of information that’s coming into your senses. They’ll be a shift that will allow you to change focus.

A reset is what’s particularly needed in the case of breaking up with a narcissist and breaking the bond with them, because it’s not the usual end to a relationship. This one requires more radical changes on your part.

Staying in the same spot and doing the same things will keep you spinning in a circle. Now is the time to pull yourself out of your usual environment and behavior.

Also, how can you change your daily routine in a healthy way? How can you treat yourself to something unusual or find a new hobby to shift your focus?

Breaking the old routine with something new that you can do, will help to shift your usual thought pattern. You get into habits, and it can take a few weeks to break those habits and go in a different direction.

So here’s some points to experiencing a narcissistic relationship reset:

• Go to a different environment. (This can be in the country or out in nature somewhere that’s relaxing.) Not for just an hour, but preferably for a week or more.
• Turn off the phone and avoid using it as much as possible (especially when it comes to anything that’s involved with the narcissist). Get way from the internet and social media.
• Talk to an old friend or other people about different things to help create new thought patterns. Shift your focus.
• Do something different. Change things up in your daily routine, and find something to do that’s new, interesting or different in a fun way.

Push that reset button in your life. Get on a plane and go. Take a different road in your environment and thought patterns, and find a new perspective.

When you do, you may be surprised at how your point of view changes. You’ll begin to see things differently. You’ll understand things better.

You’ll see things in a new light, and get a new perspective on your experiences. And in the process, a light bulb can go off, as you realize how stuck you’ve been in the relationship.

But instead of beating yourself up, feel grateful for any realizations you have. Know that you did your best, and tomorrow is a new day. Your life is waiting for you, and it’ll be better than ever.

And remember, getting additional support gives you yet another perspective that you can’t get on your own. This is a time for changing perspective and growth at the speed of light. You’ve got this.

PS: Ready to get unstuck and on track after a relationship with a narcissist? Schedule your complimentary Time to Thrive call, and we’ll take a look at your goals, challenges and options to becoming empowered and free. Also, sign up for the next Live, interactive event here.

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