In his memoir, ‘Before I Forget,’ theatre person and cultural activist MK Raina talks about the tragedy that has befallen his home state of Kashmir

Heart-breaking and devastating

By Shevlin Sebastian?

Theatre actor/director and cultural activist MK Raina grew up in the mohalla of Sheetal Nath Sathu in Srinagar. It had a mixed population of Kashmiri Pandits and Muslims. But right from his childhood, Raina experienced disruptions. On August 8, 1953, the Centre dismissed Prime Minister Sheikh Abdullah’s government. The schools were closed.?

‘Stone pelting and people agitating and fighting with the security forces were part and parcel of my growing up,’ wrote Raina in his memoir, ‘Before I Forget.’ ‘The power of the olive-green uniform and what it means becomes very clear from a very early age for every Kashmiri child.’?

But there were enjoyable moments, too. Raina attended a concert by legendary playback singer Mohammed Rafi at Bakshi Stadium. Rafi only used a harmonium and a local musician played the tabla. ‘People were enraptured when he opened the concert with his super-hit song, “Yahoo” from the film Junglee,’ wrote Raina.?

The most disturbing chapter is called, ‘Kashmir Implodes’. Raina recalls the time he spent in the government hospital in 1990 where his mother was in a coma. It was a time when the militancy had intensified. There were gunfights between the Army and the militants. Raina saw injured militants being brought in. And day and night curfews. Islamic slogans blared through speakers of mosques throughout the night. In an extraordinary section, he described how, despite the curfew, his family could conduct a cremation for their mother.?

The members of the Pandit community, including Raina’s father, fled to Jammu. ‘The centuries-old links of interdependence that existed among neighbours were washed away,’ wrote Raina. ‘No one talked to each other. Nobody looked at each other. The majority, in their helplessness, kept quiet and let all this happen to the minorities. And the minorities left…for where they did not know.’

In the end, the Pandits became refugees in their own country.?

As a young man Raina secured admission to the National School of Drama (NSD) in Delhi. Later, he settled in the capital and became a well-known cultural activist.?

But Kashmir always remained at the forefront of his consciousness. And the tragedies continued to unfold in the 1990s. ‘I would often hear of some folk theatre performer, or the other being killed,’ wrote Raina. ‘It would send shivers down my spine. No one in the media reported on the attacks on the basic cultural fabric of the Valley, and how for years, the cultural space had been taken over by religious diktats and militant organisations.’??

Even ordinary life had become difficult. ‘Because of the regular closing down of institutions, universities, colleges and schools, hopelessness had crept into the psyche of the people, who were exhausted by the constant presence of violence and death, and the oppressive gaze of the security personnel,’ wrote Raina. ‘For years, the younger generation had not experienced what one could call a “normal” day. People preferred to remain indoors for weeks. All this created many psychological illnesses. The task of helping them seemed enormous and impossible, but one had to start somewhere.’???

Raina got a chance to do something worthwhile, when, at the invitation of TV producer and presenter, Siddharth Kak, a fellow Kashmiri, he focused on the artistes of Kashmir through a popular Doordarshan programme called ‘Surabhi’. Later, he did a more elaborate series for the Press Trust of India. In 2000, Raina also conducted a theatre workshop on behalf of the NSD in Srinagar. To the two NSD colleagues who accompanied him, he recited a verse by the German playwright, Bertolt Brecht:?

In the dark times

Will there also be singing??

Yes, there will also be singing.?

About the dark times.

This was the first of many workshops.?

Raina also wrote about the tragic killing of cultural activist Safdar Hashmi in 1989, the riots following the assassination of Prime Minister Indira Gandhi on October 31, 1984, and children whose fathers had been killed in the insurgency.?

This is a most remarkable book. What holds the reader’s attention is the lucid voice of Raina speaking the truth. You get a picture of Kashmir that is tragic, unforgettable and alarming, too.

(Published in The Sunday Magazine, The New Indian Express, South India and Delhi)

Book Details

Title: Before I Forget

Author: MK Raina

Publisher: Penguin India

Pages: 409

Price: Rs 999