The Hidden Treasure Behind the Long and Winding Road

I love cars.

I have since I was seven years old and a white BMW M1 passed my family's Subaru GL wagon on Route 35 like we were stuck in the mud.

It was unlike anything I had ever witnessed before. In that one moment, I was hooked. My blood was swapped for petrol.?

Two of my current goals:

• Rebuild a 67-69 Camaro from the ground up
• Learn how to race

I think this speaks to my love of cars perfectly.?

Before being arrested by the FBI, going to prison, and losing absolutely everything, I owned a BMW M Roadster.?

It was a convertible - Imola red with a red and black leather interior, a naturally aspirated six-cylinder engine pumping out 240 horsepower to the fat rear wheels.

It was the grown-up version of my favorite childhood toy, my go-kart.

When I took the M out, I would savor every moment, from walking up to it to feeling the door handle to allowing the seats to cradle me as I slid into them. I breathed in the leather and ran my hands gently over the steering wheel.?

I would reverently insert the key into the ignition and delight as the engine came to life. Listening to the orchestra that was the exhaust before slipping it into gear and heading out to wherever I was going.

It was a process, and I loved it.?

Regardless of where I was going, I took the long way. I chose the long and winding backroad over the straight line every time.?

Sure it would take me longer, but it wasn't about getting to where I was going. It was about enjoying the journey of getting there.?

Feeling the wind in my hair, listening to the engine come to life as I kissed the redline on my way through my favorite gear shift sequence - 2nd to 3rd to 4th.

The car was a rocketship, and it handled like a charm - but it still required attention, it required awareness - it required I be present in every single moment.?

Ripping through an S-turn at 70 plus miles per hour on a tight Connecticut backroad is not the time to be daydreaming about the past or the future.?

It was a time to be focused on what I was doing at the exact moment, with my eyes looking just far enough ahead to see where I was going and what to prepare for next.

It was the pursuit of mastery, and it was incredible. It taught me the value of the long way.?

There are an overwhelming amount of courses focused on the three vocations I immerse myself in:

Coaching

Speaking

Writing

All of them promise the fastest possible way to a six-figure coaching business; your first paid speaking gig, a finished book (sometimes in as little as 30 days).

I have no issue with these courses, but they're not for me.?

I worked in the corporate world before going to prison. Everything was a constant chase. Everything was about getting to the outcome as fast as physically possible.?

Outcome after outcome after outcome.?

My entire life (except for driving the M) was about achieving the outcome and climbing professional mountain after mountain, all the while living with a success-sized hole in my chest.?

By constantly focusing on the outcome, I missed all that was around me.

But I did more than that; I created an inner belief system that my worth, who I am, is intrinsically tied to the outcome.

I measured myself by how much I completed in a day, by how many things I checked off of my list, how many deals I closed, and how much money I made.??

I measured myself by how I spent all that money I made.?

Since reinventing my life after prison, I've grown to understand something crucial to how I live my life.?

I'm not the outcome; I never was and never will be. I am the effort I put forth.?

I think of my red BMW. I think of the joy of the journey; I think of the committed, focused, and deliberate effort of pushing that car and myself to the max - not to get to the destination faster - but to become the best driver I could be.??

My coaching business took years to establish; much of the work was done before knowing I would be a coach. It was the inner journey of self-exploration; I knew I had to go in before I could out.?

I had to do this to understand myself so that, however, I ended up utilizing my experience; it would be of service to others. I couldn't and wouldn't half-ass it.?

My TEDx took over five years, from setting the goal to delivering the talk. It was also about five years before my first paid speaking engagement.?

My book was the longest journey of all, six-plus years from 1st word written to publishing.?

The process of writing the book was one of the most painful and cathartic journeys of my life, and it was a crucial component to developing my coaching business.?

Writing is sacred to me; it's my other passion outside of cars.?

Sure, there was a faster path to all of them. My social media feeds were bombarded with all the different classes and courses that would get me there the fastest.?

But I don't want the fastest route, not anymore.?

I desire the route that will teach me the most - both about myself and about whatever it is I'm investing my most precious resources (time, energy, and attention) in.

That success-sized hole I felt when I was in the corporate world?

That resulted from chasing outcomes and doing work that wasn't aligned with who I was and who I wanted to be. It resulted in thinking I could fill that hole by seeking pleasure and meaning in materialism and power.?

It didn't work and never will.?

I no longer own the M; I had to sell it while I was in prison.?

But I still take the long and windy road because of one simple fact:

The process is the reward.?

Maybe I don't make as much as when I worked in corporate, but the pursuit of mastery has filled that success-sized hole.

And there is no amount of money on earth that could ever do that.?

This, to me, is the treasure behind the long and winding road.?

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I specialize in working with high-achievers who've reached the top of their professional mountain only to find a success-sized hole in their lives.?

I help them break free of their golden handcuffs, stop living on autopilot, and hit the reset button so they can fill the success-sized hole without giving up everything they've fought so hard to build.

Join me for a Free 45-minute Reinvention Clarity Call to see if we're a match.?