The Hidden Tax on Authenticity: Why We Cover at Work

Unpacking the Pressure to Conform and the Importance of Belonging

Let's talk about a real, but often unspoken, phenomenon at work: covering. You know the feeling – dimming your light a bit, maybe toning down an aspect of your identity, just to fit in and avoid people’s negative assumptions and unconscious (and let’s face it, sometimes conscious) biases.?

A staggering 60% of employees across various identities in the US report feeling pressure to cover.?

This isn't just about LGBTQ+ individuals (although that is what initially drew me to this powerful research, as it gave me a name for something I’ve directly experienced). We all engage in it - even seemingly "dominant" identities like straight white men mask aspects of themselves, like their age or mental health struggles.?

I believe we do this because we assume - rightly or wrongly - that if known broadly, our identities will hurt us negatively. I’ve learned sometimes we’re right about that, but often we aren’t. More on that in a moment …?

This concept of covering isn't new, and it's something I explore frequently in my keynotes and teachings. The work of Professor Kenji Yoshino , Chief Justice Earl Warren Professor of Constitutional Law at NYU, truly resonates with me, as I think it’s such a resonant way to talk about belonging, what gets in the way, and what we can practically do about it. It identifies when we do it and why our need to belong is such a powerful factor in our choice to cover. What we all really want of course is all kinds of safety, particularly psychological safety in the workplace, so that we can bring our fuller selves, and contribute from a whole place of authenticity.?

Yoshino, who has personal experience with covering, sheds much light on the emotional and professional toll covering takes, and proves through his data how devastating this can be to individuals, and therefore to organizational productivity.? Imagine the untapped potential we miss out on when people feel they have to hide a part of themselves.

Have you ever felt the need to cover something at work?? Think about it – your mental health, age, marital status, housing situation, or educational background. Even seemingly insignificant aspects of covering can have a devastating impact on a team and an individual, because it taxes the individual with extra anxiety, worry, and choices - and deprives others and organizations with critical learning they must undergo, in order to progress and evolve towards healthier cultures.?

I like to use polling during my keynotes to further empower organizations and leaders on this journey by uncovering what is being left unsaid and what employees may be covering at work. Here are a few things that employees have openly shared in this exercise about a dimension they cover, why, and the impact on them:?

Socioeconomic Background:?

"I chose socioeconomic background. I’ve gotten better at managing that I don’t come from the background that my colleagues do, and telling my story. I’ve learned that my story is not for me but for others," says one employee. Another highlights what the struggle feels like: “It’s like not feeling like others can understand or appreciate that everyone doesn't start on equal footing, and dismissing the extra work it has taken to get to current status." A third shared “"I grew up in a part of town that was poorly thought of and often made fun of. I would find myself making fun of it first."

Mental Health:??

"Masking severe depression and ADHD while still being a good employee and advocate has been TOUGH," shares another. ?Another person's experience reflects the struggle for recognition: "I’ve suffered with mental health for over 15 years, and when I first started experiencing anxiety, it was not recognized as an actual thing."

Age and Generational Dynamics:

"I both must act as if I am older in some rooms and younger in others to properly align and connect with those I am speaking with."

Family Structure and Responsibilities:

"Being a parent of young children and also caring for elderly parents is a constant worry while also being concerned about not being 100% at work."

Cultural and Racial Identity:

"In the financial field, you typically don’t see any people of color in executive positions."

Sexual Orientation:

"I’ve been told I’m fairly straight passing, so I typically don’t speak about my sexual orientation at work. Also, I almost feel like I shouldn’t have to come out."

Neurodiversity:

"My ADHD is with me every day. I know when I’m activated and the impact on my team, compared to the impact when I’m de-activated.”?

Native Language and Nationality:?

"My accent sometimes makes people think I'm not as smart or polished."

Intersectionality:

"I chose abilities, but almost chose socioeconomic status. Intersectionality is important to me because I am young, come from a low-income background, and I am also bipolar, auto-immune compromised, and queer."

Physical Changes and Health:

"My mental health has been in flux for years, and it changes with trying different medications. Now I'm in menopause and cry at everything, which I hate when talking to my (male) boss."

These are just a few of many examples of covering.

Understanding covering goes beyond just legal compliance. It's about fostering a workplace culture where everyone feels they truly belong. This means creating an environment where people feel safe and empowered to bring their whole selves to work, not just a version they think others will accept.?

I am often asked how we collectively can lessen covering demands and behavior in our organizations. My biggest advice is that we all need to participate in the work of “uncovering”. We cannot ask many - especially those traditionally underrepresented and under-supported -? to take the “leap” to courageously disclose, and then not ensure a strong “net” is in place to catch them. This net includes managers and leaders who are trained and ready, and an organizational culture that’s aware and actively committed to health for all.? Otherwise, we cannot ensure the psychological safety that needs to be in place to hold the whole of the humans in our organizations, and we are leaving them to struggle through all the unchecked biases of those around them, on their own. In this case, they pay the price.?

So where do we start if we want to ensure we have cultures of safe disclosure, that are doing the work top to bottom??

It starts with ourselves, and especially anyone in a leadership position. We cannot ask anyone to uncover without being willing to do it ourselves. Leaders set the tone, and each choice they make to personally prioritize authenticity, particularly uncomfortable choices about their own struggles and journeys, is noted, and when effective, often imitated at scale by many. When repeated throughout an organization, especially at the top, cultural norms will begin to shift.?

Those who manage people need to understand their own biases, any microaggressions they’re unaware of, and language or conversation starters to begin to open up a flow of feedback and information on what is impacting the experience of belonging for those around them. They have the day-to-day ability to shift the experience of those they interact with, and need to be skilled up in their own self-awareness, listening skills, and measured on their inclusive leadership competencies. They also need continuing education on what organizational supports to steer resources to those who need them most.?

We also can encourage honest dialogue and provide language and frameworks to make it safer for everyone to raise the causes of covering. Feedback mechanisms like Employee Resource Groups (ERGs) and DEI Committees re-assure employees of many traditionally marginalized identities that their experience is real, that it matters, and that the organization needs and wants to hear and understand the feedback … and most importantly, believes it’s important to the culture, and therefore to business performance. Once feedback is gathered, it’s paramount that it’s acknowledged and associated action is taken.?

I've dedicated a few episodes of The Will To Change podcast to exploring the concept of covering in more detail, which I invite you to tune into as it’s important we all understand:?

1. The difference between covering and "passing"
2. The impact of covering on employee well-being and productivity
3. How covering extends beyond specific identity groups
4. The legal landscape surrounding covering
5. Remedies to decrease covering, and increase organizational safety?

We all have a role to play in creating workplaces that celebrate authenticity. I would love for you to take some time to share your thoughts, and let's work together to dismantle the pressure to cover. Ultimately, it's about creating a space where everyone feels comfortable bringing their whole selves to work – and that's a win for everyone.

Looking to help guide your team through this important conversation? Connect with us to learn about co-creating a learning experience for your organization.

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