Hidden Tattoos

“Oh she’s got some hidden tattoos for sure”

I recently spent an entire day at a tattoo studio - baby in tow. If you’ve never hung out in a tattoo shop with a baby, highly recommend. You meet a lot of interesting people, hear some pretty wild stories.?

Bonus is everyone wants to know what a baby is doing there. It’s a real conversation starter. Most people assumed my husband was getting a tattoo related for the baby. A sweet footprint maybe? Wrong. Three kids in, he was getting our dog’s paw print. But that’s a story for another day.?

Tattoos have been part of the “what’s OK for work today” convo for a while. Swinging from “totally inappropriate” to “show ‘em off!” No matter where you fall on that spectrum, they’re a point of conversation.?

I was once making idle conversation with a seat-mate on a plane when tattoos came up. 3 hours later, I knew her entire life story, from her grandparents to the kids she didn’t yet have - all based on one tattoo she had rolled-up her sleeve to show me.?

I like a good hidden tattoo like that.?

You don’t know the person has it, you’d never find out about it unless you ask, but once you start asking, you pull on a thread that reveals something about that person.?

We’ve been running a lot of off-sites lately. From Senior Exec groups to ERG Leaders and new managers, there are a few things that stay consistent, no matter the group. More than anything, people are thrilled to be together. They want to spend the time learning about each other. Yes, digging into meaty strategic planning and learning, but more than anything, connecting to the human side of their peers.?

A few things we think about when we’re planning an off-site/onsite:

• Things take longer in person! (go cross off 50% of your agenda right now)?
• Take advantage of being together in a physical space (get people moving)
• Don’t be afraid to repeat. People will: do it differently the 2nd time, have different takeaways, reinforce skills?
• People remember one thing when they leave: stories?
• Get vulnerable, get real. Do it early and often?
• The more unexpected, the better?

Those last 2 are what have me thinking about hidden tattoos.?

We’ve all got them. Whether it’s actual ink or not. I guarantee that the people you work with, talk with every day, collaborate with, and feel you already know, have lots of hidden tattoos. Some more obvious than the others.?

True story, we once hosted a session at a small org. There were 2 guys who had been working together for 5 years. They sat in cubicles next to each other. Until that day, they never knew they had kids the same age with the same name. That Kunik Conversation was about active listening, and still that info came out. How could that be, you might think? Because we’re not talking with each other enough. We’re talking a lot, sure. But we’re not actually getting to know each other as humans, on the most basic levels.?

As far as personal info goes, kid name and age is pretty surface level. Imagine what else there is to connect over if you dig a little deeper? Those are the hidden tattoos. Those deeply personal, sometimes revealing, always special details about a person.?

Why does this matter??

If you want to unlock performance + profit. If you want to drive retention. If you want to build a successful company, you need one thing.

People.?

People who care about each other perform better. Companies who care about their people perform better. The path to caring is built on relationships + trust. And you get both of those by sharing.?

People won’t just open up and share though. They will follow by example. We start every offsite with an exercise grounded in vulnerability, built on the idea of revealing who we are so we can learn who you are. Without fail, in every single room we’ve done it in, the energy palpably changes afterwards. We have a few different exercises we use depending on the audience, but the result is the same. If the person leading the exercise doesn’t start by rolling up their sleeves, showing off their hidden tattoos, and sharing something deep and personal about who they are, no one else will (literally or metaphorically, take your pick!).?

I imagine most of you are trying to figure out how to drive performance while also strengthening morale right now. Whether you’ve just been through lay-offs, are trying to manage through cutbacks, or are making a plan to reach annual goals, now is the time to double down on team building and connection. It starts with getting really personal.?

What hidden tattoos do you have? What about your team?

Invites:

• ERG Roundtable : Engaging Executive Sponsors?
• Employee Experience Roundtable : Where we work now?
• Kunik People Leader Summits:
• Miami?
• Boston?
• Dallas

What we’re reading:

• America’s ESG hiring boom is cooling?
• GenZ’s lay-off hack: government jobs
• Agility to elevate your facilitation skills?
• Business leaders want HR to innovate?
• Is “Kind Productivity” what we’ve been missing?
• Let’s redefine our gendered idea of “Ambition”
• 70% of leaders have no idea how to lead a hybrid team?
• Companies need a better read on what their people actually do