The Hidden Source of Stress

Once you accept, truly accept, that stuff will happen to you and that there is nothing you can do about it, stress miraculously leaves your life.

-?????? Srikumar Rao

We live in a world where we’re taught from an early age that stress is a normal part of everyday life. We watch our parents as small children and we silently absorb their examples, learning to incorporate anger, fear, stress and anxiety into our behaviour on a daily basis. We’re surrounded by people who exhibit signs of stress all the time and we naturally assume that this is how we’re all expected to feel.

But is this the only way for us to celebrate the gift of our lives? Stressed, anxious, fearful and out of touch with our potential? Is it time for us to seek a better alternative that helps us to wake up feeling more centred, balanced, focused and, perhaps, happy?

Remember that stress doesn’t come from what’s going on in your life. It comes from your thoughts about what’s going on in your life.

–????? Andrew J. Bernstein

We could start the discussion by considering the cultural framework that shapes our expectations. There’s a tidal wave of information on social media that talks about how to manage our lives in order to reduce the stress. And that’s a very revealing interpretation of what’s at the root of our anxiety and discomfort. We’re led to believe that our stress is a product of our environment. We’re asked to believe that if we change our circumstances, somehow, we’ll free ourselves from the burdens of everyday life. But, whilst it makes perfect sense to seek improvements in our lives, it doesn’t mean that we’ll feel happier or less stressed.

And why is this? Because stress is largely a habit.

Our initial reaction to this statement is to question its meaning. We shake our heads in disbelief and ask ourselves if it can really be true. We look at the complexity of our lives and the challenges that show up uninvited every day and we’re sure we know where the pressures are coming from.

It seems perfectly rational to conclude that, if we could change our circumstances, we could free ourselves from the heavy weight that presses down on our shoulders. We could find the elusive space to breathe more freely and enjoy a moment of respite from all the problems.

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.

–????? William James

And then we pause for a moment to consider the possibility that our stress is really just an expression of how we’ve been conditioned to react. It’s a revolutionary way to understand the underlying cause of our behaviour. We were taught to behave like this and we’re surrounded by a sea of stressed individuals who serve as a constant reminder of what ‘normality’ looks like.

In fairness, this isn’t an inevitable condition. There are many examples of individuals who understand the connection between the way we’ve been taught to react and the possibility of taking control of these responses. The difference is extraordinary. Rather than struggling to make the world conform to their vision of an easier life, they’ve taken control of their internal landscape and discovered that stress is nothing more than the way our thoughts and feelings respond to whatever’s happening.

We can learn to pause, to breathe, to relax and consider the best way to react. Or perhaps choose not to react at all.

Everything you need you already have; you are complete right now. You are a whole total person, not an apprentice person on the way to someplace else. Your completeness must be understood by you and experienced in your thoughts as your own personal reality.

–????? Wayne Dyer

This is the foundation of greater awareness. It’s an invitation to become conscious of our inner world rather than being constantly distracted by the shifting patterns of the world that surrounds us.

As you learn to direct your thoughts and feelings in more positive and healthy directions, you notice that you feel less anger, fear, jealousy, pain and resentment. These are the poisons we consume every day when we tune our energy towards stress and anxiety. When we reserve the right for ourselves to make better choices and react in ways that empower us, we free ourselves from the old, conditioned behaviours that are so detrimental to our wellbeing.

This is not a new idea. Whilst we’ve made extraordinary progress in the field of science and technology, there are countless examples of ancient philosophies that sought to understand and explain the nature and potential of human consciousness. The idea that we can exercise far greater control over our thoughts and feelings to enhance our physical and mental health is a good example of how these ancient traditions and their methods have proved to be persistently effective for thousands of years. What might strike you as surprising is the simplicity of the methods. It really couldn’t be easier. Pause. Relax. Breathe and consider how you would prefer to feel. That’s it. Practise the technique and your mind will do the rest.

Now, that’s a fabulous new habit that could make a world of difference to how you experience every moment of your life.

Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.

–????? Chinese proverb

Make a simple decision right now to free yourself from the limiting and harmful habit of stress and unleash your full potential for greater health, happiness and fulfilment.

If you enjoy these blogs, you can imagine how much fun it is to have Greg in the room as an inspirational and highly perceptive speaker. If you’d like to invite Greg to talk to your company or organisation or event, either in person or via a live link on the Internet, feel free to get in touch.

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