The Hidden Power of 'Why' in Negotiation

Have you ever wondered why some negotiators seem to have a magical ability to handle complex situations? I'll share a little secret with you.

• We didn't memorise a playbook of tactics.
• We understand the 'why' of negotiation techniques.

Let's unpack this approach here and now.

Successful negotiators tap into psychological insights.

1. Emotional Intelligence: We read and manage emotions - both our own and others'. This isn't manipulation. It's just knowing what drives decisions.
2. Cognitive Biases: We know how biases like anchoring or framing influence choices. By understanding these, we can make proposals more persuasive.
3. Trust: The foundation of any good negotiation. So we understand how to build it, and why!

Let's go beyond surface-level tactics here.

Knowing 'why' allows for more flexibility and creativity. Such as:

• Adaptability: Tailor our approach to each situation and person.
• Creativity: Create new strategies based on core principles, not strict scripts.
• Responsiveness: Better handle unexpected shifts in negotiations.

We also want to play the long game, because building relationships is a fundamental

Focusing on 'why' makes us value long-term relationships over short-term gains. This leads to better, more sustainable outcomes for both sides.

The real magic in a negotiation is creating value.

Knowing 'why' helps you to:

• Identify shared interests more effectively
• Explore win-win solutions
• Brainstorm to uncover hidden needs and preferences.

But be aware of some common traps:

1. Overanalyzing: Don't get stuck in analysis paralysis.

2. Misinterpreting Motivations: Avoid projecting your own biases.

3. Neglecting Practical Aspects: Don't forget about tangible outcomes and logistical concerns.

4. Emotional Overinvestment: Maintain objectivity while being empathetic.

Avoid dominating the discussion. Aim for balanced conversations.

• Practice active listening (aim for that 70/30 listening-to-talking ratio)
• Use open-ended and clarifying questions
• Allow pauses in the conversation
• Frame your position. Align it with their goals.

Remember, motivations and negotiation styles can vary by culture. What works in Singapore might not work in Scotland. Please always be careful about the cultural nuances.

You can continually improve if you want to.

Focusing on 'why' makes every negotiation a chance to learn. Reflect on each experience. Seek diverse views. Always improve your grasp of human behaviour and decision-making.

Next time you're preparing for a negotiation:

1. Investigate the other party's possible motives and limits.

2. Reflect on your own biases and emotional triggers.

3. Prepare questions that dig into the 'why' behind stated positions.

4. Think about how you can create value for all parties involved.

Remember, great negotiation isn't about winning at all costs. It's about deep understanding, creating value, and building relationships.

I'd love to hear how this approach works for you. Drop me a line and share your experiences!

Until next time, keep asking 'WHY'!

Your apex negotiator

Scott