Hi, I’m Jason…and I’m a dope-addict.

My addiction started around 2008 while becoming MySpace famous in a rock band I started with a childhood friend.

Like any addiction, it started off slow–like ‘I knew I had this under control’.

I was able to hide my urges from my family pretty well, too…for a time.

But like any unhealthy addiction, the control I thought I had was merely a delusion.

I was taking hits immediately after waking up, during business hours, and even right before bed, with my wife in the other room.

The high was unlike any other I’ve experienced (and believe me, I’m experienced…see picture above).

It created a feeling of power, pride, belonging, and significance.

After nearly losing my wife and children to my addiction, things began to change for me…

For a time.

Then, like the heroin addict’s insatiable desire to feel the pinch of the needle, and the forbidden fluid rushing through their veins, the urges would beckon me to partake yet again, and again…

…and again.

Although I’ll admit that I still haven’t kicked my habit completely, I’m happy to say that I’ve established some healthy boundaries that have made things better for me and my family.

You could say I’m a high-functioning dope-addict.

The sobering truth is…

I’ll always be just one click, tap, or swipe away from a full-blown relapse.

“Dope” is short for dopamine.

Dopamine is the brain’s neurotransmitter that helps control the reward and pleasure centers.

Every time I get a like, a tweet, a “poke” (okay not a poke!), my dopamine receptors light up.

It feels good.

So, naturally my brain wants more.

And like Pavlov’s dog, when the bell rings, I feed the slobbering, leg-loving mutt.

The ubiquitous color-filled circle containing the beautiful white digits is my bell, and my brain is the dog.

Although I do appreciate the good social media can do (e.g. connecting and keeping in touch with distant friends and family members, connecting with listeners, and promoting what’s going on with User Defenders podcast), it’s been fascinating lately to observe various founders and significant players in addictive tech (including a Facebook co-founder) coming forth declaring how they regret bringing this stuff into the world.

Many studies are coming forth as well about how some of the digital products we are addicted to have not helped humanity one bit, in fact they’re hurting us and our brains significantly.

In my latest episode of User Defenders podcast, web design pillar Jeremy Keith and I discuss something completely outside his usual lane.

We talk about the importance of building software that’s both ethical and that doesn’t prey on the psychological vulnerabilities of humans.

At one point, he mentions the VW software developer who was prosecuted and convicted (and is now serving five years in prison) for writing code that falsified emissions test data.

In the interview, Jeremy makes this really provocative statement that really sums up my feelings on the issues of addictive and unethical tech:

“A Hippocratic oath in software design is not a bad idea since the things we create have such a large impact on the people using them. The code we write can be used against us in a court of law.”

Are you a dope-addict, like me?

Have some crazy things happened in your life as a result of your addiction?

There just so happens to be a magic pill that I’m just letting melt in my mouth, not in my hands, even though it’s quite simple to swallow.

It’s recognizing there’s a serious problem (if indeed there is), putting up healthy boundaries (protecting a garden from critters), and practicing the seemingly lost art of self-control.

To wrap this up, perhaps we all ought to bookmark what has been hailed as the “very last page of the internet”, and visit when we feel like we’re trudging down that binary butte.

I strongly believe that we, our families, and humanity will be better for it.

This article was first published on the User Defenders podcast Bi-Weekly Bugle.