“Hey Siri, Can You Teach Me How to Be Human Again?” - The Disappearance of Authenticity in E-Commerce

If you're looking for a traditional boring newsletter, this will not be for you.

Once upon a time, in a land far away, people used to sell things online by being human. They would talk to each other, share genuine stories, maybe even crack a joke or three (without consulting their AI first). But today, it seems like the e-commerce world has taken a nosedive into the uncanny valley, where robots and algorithms rule the day, and authenticity? Well, it’s as extinct as Blockbuster or MySpace.

For those that don't know me, my name is Bryan MacDonald and I am the Director of eCommerce of Oma's Pride , a fourth generation family owned and operated raw pet food company. I am also a co-host of the ASOM Pod Podcast, which I highly recommend giving a listen to. Most importantly, I am the dad of three amazing kids, Ava (4), Jameson aka Jamo (2), and Mia (little tiny baby). My amazing wife puts up with me on a daily basis and deserves a special shout out even though she won't make it this far into the newsletter.

My goal every week is to share the code I cracked. After joining LinkedIn earlier this year, I noticed that only 1% of people were truly being authentic. Too many people were consumed with metrics. Too many people were consumed with faking it. Too many people just weren't themselves. Then, they would complain that their brand, agency, or software company wasn't growing. Hmmm.. I wonder why that is? (Insert thinking emoji here) Pour a glass of your favorite beverage and let's dive in.

The Rise of the Machines (and Influencers, and Paid Media, and AI, and… You Get the Point)

We’re living in a world where your toaster is smarter than your average human. (No offense, toasters, you’re doing great! Except for the toaster that my wife sold on Facebook Marketplace in 2021 during the pandemic, that thing was awful) But in our quest to optimize, automate, and dominate every corner of the internet, we’ve forgotten the golden rule of selling: Be a human being. You know, the species that used to shake hands, look each other in the eye, and crack jokes.

Instead, we’ve handed over the keys to the kingdom to AI, paid media, influencers, and affiliates. Now, I’m not saying these tools aren’t useful. Obviously they are crucial to operating successful business in 2024. But when your brand’s identity is reduced to a hashtag and a catchy slogan that was generated by something that doesn’t even have thumbs, we might have a problem.

“Siri, How Do I Show Empathy?”

Gone are the days when selling meant connecting with another human on a personal level. Now it’s all about ROI, CPC, ROAS, other acronyms that, let’s be honest, make us sound more like accountants than people. I absolutely despise LinkedIn and X "influencers" who throw out these acronyms and tie metrics to them just to make themselves feel and sound important and successful. We’re so busy optimizing our paid media strategies and getting influencers to pretend they love our products (seriously, Karen, we know you don’t drink that garbage) that we’ve forgotten the magic of simply being a real person.

Remember when customer service meant talking to an actual human being, not an AI that calls you by the wrong name? Or when storytelling didn’t involve a content calendar, a team of copywriters, and a video production budget that could fund a small country’s GDP? Ah, the good old days.

Humans vs. Algorithms: The Ultimate Showdown

Here’s a little secret: people still want to buy from people. Crazy, right? In a world where you can order anything from socks to a Siberian tiger with just a few clicks, the brands that stand out are the ones that remember how to be human.

So how do you do it? How do you break free and remind people that behind the screen, there’s a real person who actually cares?

1. Tell a Story: Not the kind your AI wrote. A real story. About real people. (Example: For those who know and follow me, you know how much I publicly despise my neighbor. The stories I tell about her are real. I really do hate her)
2. Be Funny: Because nothing says “I’m human” like a well-timed joke. Just make sure it’s not the kind of joke that gets you canceled. Although, don't be afraid to get cancelled. It's a fine line and tightrope that I try to walk on a daily basis (insert laughing emoji here).
3. Get Personal: Show your customers that you’re not just a faceless entity powered by algorithms and an unhealthy obsession with analytics. Respond to their comments, answer their questions, and maybe even share a selfie that doesn’t look like it was taken in a corporate boardroom. A million dollar tip I can give you here is for all owners and operators to carve out 5 hours per month (roughly 1 hour per week) to call their customers and clients directly. I don't care how big your brand is. I don't care what side of town you grew up on. I don't care how many millions you have in your off-shore bank account. Call your damn customers and talk to them. I'll share more stories regarding this simple tip in later newsletters.
4. Stop Overthinking It: Seriously, stop. We’re all guilty of trying to make everything perfect. But sometimes, the best way to connect with people is to just be real. Be you, not someone who you think that you should be. Be genuine. It's simple.

Conclusion: How to Sell Anything by Being Human

Here’s the thing: authenticity isn’t dead. It’s just been shoved aside by the digital tidal wave of AI, paid media, influencers, and every other shiny tool in the e-commerce toolbox. But if you can find a way to bring a little humanity back into your brand, whether you’re selling socks, software, or courses, you will accomplish unimaginable things.

So go ahead, embrace your inner human. Tell your story, tell a joke, and most importantly, remember that at the end of the day, people don’t just want products or services, they want a connection. And that, my friends, is something no AI, influencer, or affiliate can ever replace.

That's all I have for now folks. My four year old just tried to drink glue and pretend it was milk.