He's in Chronic Pain

“He’s in chronic pain, it hurts when he moves, he aches for days after matches and he’s lost so much power over the last year it’s unreal, he even moves like an old man.

On top of that he’s lazy and he doesn’t seem to be able to focus, but he could be great. 

We’ve tried everything, can you help?” 

His coach asked me, disbelief in his eye. 

“ Yep”. I say. 

“If he’s not pain free, on top of his game and chasing the next session within the next 10 weeks, I’ll give you your money back.” 

My first thought was that this description didn’t fit any professional athlete I know but I’ve heard worse. 

The first thing I isolated in his assessment was an inhibited diaphragm. 

Fixing that gave him his range back and his ability to produce force. 

Next was his inner ear. 

His balance was all over the place meaning overworked muscles galore. 

Three weeks of drills made a significant difference and performances started to improve. 

Here was the kicker though.

He had made significant improvements but he was reaching muscle fatigue doing things that sedentary people wouldn’t. 

He still sounded like a slow and dopie teenager and his muscles hurt when I pressed them. 

I was still seeing what was causing him to call himself lazy. 

I knew I was missing something. 

Lazy doesn’t really exist, it’s just the brain sensing threat (real or perceived) and motivating us to do nothing. 

We’d had 3 physical sessions. 

I decided this next session would be detective work. I figured that we got on well enough for me to get some honest answers now. 

We chatted for maybe 10 minutes when I discovered all I needed to know. 

I wasn’t completely sure but 97% certain I had found the silver bullet. 4 weeks in and I had kept my promise. 

It went like this. 

“So how much water do you drink?” I asked.

“Water? None, actually, does Soda count?”

He asked. 

“It’s all diet” he added believing he was allowing it to pass the test. 

“hhhhhmmmm... 

is it, 

by any chance, 

Monster?” 

I inquired. 

“Yes, how did you know?” 

“Boom! 

That’s it I said,

Laziness,

Inability to focus,

Chronic pain,

Weakness,

Chronic fatigue

Your Adrenal glands are fried my young friend” 

I called his coach who promptly offered him 1000dkk to not drink another can for the whole summer.

“Beers is ok right?” He asked. 

“Yep”. I said. 

That was three weeks ago

In that time he has done 21 workouts, 

laziness gone, chronic fatigue gone. 

Had his best 2 coaching sessions of his career.

Produced his highest ever tournament finish

and his body no longer hurts. 

Am I proud of my work, yes of course but this post is a public service announcement. 

Excess caffeine consumption and excess soda consumption will fuck you up!