Herstory: She’s More than a Mother-Recognizing a Black Woman’s Strengths

“That man over there says that women need to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have the best place everywhere. no one ever does any of these things for me, and ain't I a woman??I have borne thirteen children, and seen most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried out with my mother's grief, none but Jesus heard me! And ain't I a woman?” (Sojourner Truth 1851; Women’s Rights Convention; Old Stone Church; Akron, Ohio)

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“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” (Proverbs 31:10)

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“Ain’t I a Woman?” It was during her 1851 Women’s Rights Convention speech that Sojourner Truth (Isabelle Baunfree) asked this question about herself as a Black woman. She questioned her lack of civil rights as a Black woman, compared to those of White women. Although she had delivered babies like White women, she was treated differently, and Black women were respected differently, if at all. Her cries were for all women to be treated the same and afforded the same privileges and opportunities. Sadly, in 2024, one hundred and seventy three years later, far too many Black women continue to ask the same question, ‘Am I not a woman? ‘I have given birth to children, and even if I haven’t given natural birth, I have served as the mother of other’s children. Why am I still being seen and treated differently than a White woman?’

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Although Black women fought for women’s rights through the women suffrage movement, White women, who should have been considering themselves sisters in the movement with Black women, denied Black women the right to participate in the women’s suffrage movement with them. The National American Woman Suffrage Association prevented Black women from attending their conventions, although they were fighting for the same causes. Too often, Black women were forced to march separately from White women during the women suffrage parades. Weren’t Black women also women? Justice delayed is justice denied. Although Black women had been fighting for women’s rights since 1800, it wasn’t until the passage of the 1965 Voting Rights Act that African-Americans, including Black women, were granted the full right to vote. White women gained their right to vote August 26, 1920.

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Malcolm X once stated during his 1964, speech to women, “The most disrespected person in America is the Black woman. The most unprotected person in America is the Black woman. The most neglected person in America is the Black woman.” It’s amazing that the same words spoken by Malcolm X about Black women in America during his 1964 speech to women, still hold true in 2024. Too often, people see what they consider the Black woman’s glory, but they are a far cry away from knowing or understanding her story.

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Unfortunately, some people spend a lifetime blocking pathways, detouring roadways, deterring dreams, closing doors, locking gates, and excluding people, while erecting walls and barriers that could and would allow some boy, some girl, some man, or some woman to recognize their God-given rights to achieving success in life. These negative actions of blocking, detouring, deterring, closing, locking, excluding, and other forms of discrimination are often based on color, race, religion, gender, geographical location, as well as social and economic status.

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Somehow, out of all of the actions put in place to hinder, hamper, delay, and deny clear passage for others to recognize their success, many manage to rise up; not for the good of or benefit of self, but for the good of and the benefit of all. When it is all said and done, Black, Brown, and Indigenous men and women fit the mold of rising up and standing up, beyond the breaks, barely escaping, but surviving against all odds. However, as we celebrate Mother’s Day, there is one group that has defied and continues to defy all odds. This group consists of the Black women who are too often relegated to the back of the room and the bottom of the totem pole, as they are often rebuked and scorned, just because they are Black, beautiful, bold, and often misunderstood!

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Black women are often overlooked, stereotyped, and judged by historical myths and precepts that have been perpetuated throughout time. Their hips were considered too broad, their lips were considered too thick and too large, their noses were considered too wide, their voices were considered too resounding, and on many occasions, they have been and still are considered ‘ugly.’ Such labels, myths, and sentiments have drawn attention away from the Black woman’s beauty, aptitude, and intelligence. Amazingly, although the Black woman has been the least respected, too many other women with thin lips have tried to emulate her, and in many instances, they have tried to become a replica of her. They have used collagen to enlarge their lips, as well as hip lifters and collagen to more round and broaden their hips. If the Black woman’s body wasn’t/isn’t beautiful, and she wasn’t/isn’t respected, why do so many other women who don’t look like her seem to try to emulate her? Isn’t the Black woman a woman deserving of the same attributes and opportunities as other women? Hence, the derivation of the term “imposter syndrome.” Who is actually the imposter? The Black woman has been and continues to be herself. She is more than a mother. She is a woman too…a Black woman!!!

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Black women are too often denied equitable treatment and maligned in the present and expected to deny and forget their story, their journey, and the pain of their past. In the workplace, the Black woman is expected to operate in silence. Her intellect and abilities are often seen and treated as secondary to her blackness and her femaleness. Too often, when she speaks up and speaks out in the workplace, the mute button is pressed, and she is suppressed. Her thoughts and feelings are ignored, and her valid contributions become invalidated considerations. Black women are often bullied, treated as invisible, and instead of having a seat at the table, they are often the focus of the meal on the table. The harder she works, the further behind she seems to fall. Isn’t she a woman? However, she has persevered, following Congresswoman Shirley Chisolm’s directive, “If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring a folding chair.” The Black woman is more than a mother!

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?No matter how hard she struggles, no matter how much she has done and continues to do to overcome her struggles, no matter how much she perseveres, the Black woman is often castigated and seen as a threat. While White women are seen as assertive, soft, and demure, no matter how intelligent and no matter how diplomatic Black women present themselves, they are still too often seen as less than, aggressive, hard, and brash. ?Because she shows up, she speaks up, and she speaks out, a Black woman is seen as not only being aggressive, but also unmanageable, and is labeled as, ‘needing to be controlled and handled.’ Is not the Black woman a strong woman?

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Since when did a Black woman become a wild and untamed animal that she had to be or has to be muzzled, tamed, harnessed, and controlled? Although she has been raped, sold, and pawned, the Black woman is the base and the basis of how women hold the very fiber of America together, including the family. Even when the system denied her the right to have and hold her children and her man, she continued forward with a broken heart, but never with a broken spirit. When it came to motherhood, not only did the Black woman serve as mother for and to her own children, but she also served as mother for so many babies and children who didn’t look like her, especially the babies and children of the White women on the plantation. Her breasts became the plantation milk source, while she nurtured her children and those of her ‘masssah.’ On many occasions, Black women were faced with cleaning her house as she traveled far and wide to clean houses of White women as domestic workers, often to the neglect of herself and her family. Black women remain resilient!

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?When their men were being whipped, chained, stolen, hung, castigated, and castrated, it was the Black woman who was forced to hold her family together, often without the father of her children. In the fifties, when the American establishment decided that family and welfare assistance should not and would not be afforded to Black women and Black children, it was the Black woman who sacrificed everything to hold her family together. Her man was on many occasions barred from physically living within the confines of their home, based on racial and economic prejudices and discrimination.

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The unfounded scrutiny, disrespect, and humiliation thrust upon many Black men and Black women during the fifties by the American welfare system continued the breakdown of the Black family system that started on the plantation. To her embarrassment, and often to the embarrassment of the father of her children, before monetary and food welfare assistance could or would be provided to needy Black families, the Black woman had to see her Black man once again not be a part of her family system. The White social workers would search the homes of economically needy Black families to see if there were shoes belonging to the Black father under the beds and in the closets of Black women. Current media too often portray Black women as not being desirable or the choice of Black men. Instead, White women are portrayed as more desirable and the choice of Black men. However, in the midst of the degradation and pain, still, Black women never give up!?

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When it comes to economics, there is a great and grand disparity gap in the earning power and earning potential of Black women, compared to others. No matter how much education and work experience Black women possess, they are less likely to have the same earning potential as White men and White women. Equity is many times only a catch all term for Black women. Hundreds of years later, Black women are still waiting for equitable treatment, because it hasn’t happened yet!

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The discriminatory factors used against Black women continue. Her pay is often based on racial and gender myths and stereotypes regarding her hair, her physical size and physical attributes, her intelligence, and myths regarding her ability to lead. The Aunt Jemima figure was for far too long used to typify and objectify the Black woman, denying her beauty, her intelligence, and her strength. She has been for far too long seen as a mammie and not as the mother she has been and the mother she continues to be, not just for her children, but for children for whom she did not give birth. The Black woman is more than a mother!

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In 2022, Black women earned seventy percent as much as White men, while White woman earned seventy eight percent as much as White men. Black women, no matter how much experience, and no matter how much education are often relegated to lower wage positions. However, no matter how she has been and continues to be held down and held back economically, to use Maya Angelou’s words, Black women can proudly state, “Still I Rise.”

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Black women can make a dime out of a nickel, stretching a penny to become a dollar. Although her earning potential doesn’t compare to her White female and White male counterparts, Black women are one of the greatest economic forecasters and greatest CPAs ever, without formal training. Her struggles and her trauma can’t compare to her stamina, her determination, and her faith in God. These factors have brought her through her past, helping her to maintain in the present, while preparing and catapulting her into her future. No matter how dismal the economic forecast seems, the Black woman, through faith, hope, and perseverance, will ensure that she and her family can and will survive. And being the mother she is, even if she doesn’t eat, due to financial challenges, her children will most certainly eat! Still, she is more than a mother; she is a woman!

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Because of the denial of equity for Black women within the American society, much of their life journeys have been overshadowed by them feeling forced to engage in efforts to deny themselves and become different. However, the expectations for Black women to become different have meant and continues to mean that they should no longer exist in the realm of their God-given physical appearance. Being different meant lightening their beautiful dark skin, while engaging in efforts to straighten their gloriously looking kinky hair, while denying the beauty of their broad nose, thick lips, and wide hips, to be accepted by the White society. Unfortunately, many of the efforts put forth by Black women to change their physical appearances to fit into and be accepted by the White world have jeopardized them in many ways.?

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As the Black woman has sought acceptance and respect from a White society that has denied and disrespected her, she has placed her physical, mental, emotional, psychological, and spiritual beliefs, safety, and health at risk. Her efforts to be accepted by lightening her skin and straightening her hair have not made her any more accepted or respected by a society that has rejected, disrespected, and neglected her throughout her life. However, she has been faced with physical, mental, and emotional challenges that on many occasions cannot and have not been able to be corrected. Her efforts to become ‘coke bottle thin’ by losing extreme amounts of body weight have sometimes conflicted with her body structure. Her attempts to chemically straighten her hair for acceptance by the white society and the white workplace have been shown to cause various forms of cancer. According to the CDC, Black maternal mortality is nearly three times the rate of White women. Black women are more likely to develop and die from all forms of cancer than White women.

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Black women are the epitome of the ‘survival of the fittest,’ and an integral part of the soul of America. No matter what has been thrown at her and against her, and no matter what has been thrown in front of her, she has been and continues to be a survivalist. No matter how many blocks, detours, closures, locks, deterrents, exclusions, and other forms of discrimination, such as racism and sexism they have faced and continue to face, Black women refuse to give up. They don’t give in, and they refuse to surrender. Her children are primary in her life, she stands by her man, and she is the first to forgive, while moving on, in the midst of her pain. In the words of former Congresswoman, Shirley Chisolm, on so many fronts, Black women can say that they are ‘unbought and unbossed.’

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James Brown once sang, ‘it’s a man’s world.’ In the same song, he recognized and went on further to sing, ‘but it would be nothing without a woman or a girl.’ As we celebrate Mother’s Day 2024, it is past time to recognize and respect the major contributions Black women have made and continue to make in life, for life, and specifically to and for the American life. Kamala Harris is not only the first woman, but also the first Black woman to become Vice President of the United States of America. Congresswoman Shirley Chisolm was the first Black woman to run for president of the United States of America. Harriet Tubman led countless enslaved Blacks to freedom from the south to the north, through the darkness of night through the underground railroad. Poet Maya Angelou had no fear of highlighting the Black woman as a “Phenomenal Woman.” Ida B. Wells was an investigative reporter and activist, who participated in the fight for women’s suffrage, and was one of the founding members of the NAACP. Oprah Winfrey, a Black woman, is a top talk show host, actress, producer, and billionaire a few times over. Michelle Obama is an attorney, author, and the first Black First Lady of the United States.

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Just to name a few more Back women contributors to the American dream, Madam CJ Walker was an entrepreneur, political and social activist, and the first female self-made millionaire. Ketanji Brown Jackson is the first Black female Supreme Court Justice. Dorothy Height was a civil rights activist, and she served as president of the National Council of Negro Women (NCNW) for forty years. Mae Jemison is an engineer, physician, and former NASA astronaut. Whoopi Goldberg is an actor, author, television personality, recognized as one of only nineteen EGOTs. There are many more accomplished Black women, but too many to name for this article, However, on this Mother’s Day and every day of the year, we pay homage to Black women everywhere, who have contributed, as well as those who continue to contribute, while continuing the journey to fight racism, sexism, classism, and ageism. It is time to not only stop the disrespect, but to also stop the neglect, and the lack of protection of Black women. Aren’t they women too?

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Imagine if you began to look at and see Black women through their eyes, and not through your own eyes. Get to know them for who they are, and not try to make them into who you want them to become. Imagine if you decided to no longer engage in racial, gender, economic, social, and political stereotyping, and inequities when it comes to anyone, but especially Black women. Imagine if you began to respect, accept, and protect, Black women the same way you respect, accept, and protect other women, especially White women. Imagine if you used your economic and political power to unlock the doors of your mind, if you removed the blinders from your eyes, allowing you to see the reality of others; if you unclenched your teeth, let go of disgust and anger, to meet others where they are, instead of trying to drag them and take them to where you want them to be. Imagine if you opened your fists to allow your hands to reach out and touch those who have been excluded, such as Black women, with the touch of love. Imagine if you opened your heart to begin to feel the beat and the emotions outside of yourself, reaching out to exercise care and love from the perspective of the Black woman. You might come to praise her, instead of resenting and rejecting her. Is not the Black woman a worthy woman? How long have you seen her glory, without having a clue about her story?

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Just imagine an imagination of a reality where you recognize and accept differences, no matter how different people seem, allowing yourself to be able to behold the similarities that exist. Imagine if you lived out your imagination in love, truth, respect, acceptance, equity, and equality. And just imagine unity without hostility. ?A Black woman is more than a mother; she is a woman, strong, bold, beautiful, and proud. Happy Mother’s Day!!!!?

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“If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, these women together ought to be able to turn it back and get it right side up again! And now they is asking to do it, the men better let them.” Sojourner Truth (Ain’t I A Woman? 1851)

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“She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household.” (Proverbs 31:15)

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