Help Your Team Course-Correct with the GUIDE Feedback Method

This is part TWO of a four-part series of articles addressing some of the most commonly requested topics in professional leadership development: “What can I do to help my team improve?”, “How can I provide difficult feedback?”, “What can I do to influence people?”, and “How can I inspire my team?”. Ubiquity has developed a complimentary, simple to learn, easy-to-retain and effective-to-use system to address each of these questions. Over the coming weeks, we will present each of these models, which form an integrated “G4 Leadership System” that will help leaders create the efficiencies and effectiveness that they are entrusted to deliver.?

In Part 1, we covered the GROW Coaching Method. Here in Part 2, we explore the GUIDE Feedback Method. For Part 3, we will dive into the GAIN Influence Method, and finally, in Part 4 we will examine the GREAT Inspiration Method for maximizing motivation and engagement. In practice, there is no start or finish, but an ongoing oscillation between each of these four modules.

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Several years ago, the company I was working for transferred a “problem employee” to my team. I was told that he was returning to the company after having served an unpaid leave for fighting with other staff, but during his reintegration training, his anger boiled over as he threatened the Trainer and intimidated the other Trainees. On his first day back in the office, it was my job to provide him with difficult feedback and, hopefully, provide some course correction.?He arrived 38 minutes late wearing inappropriate clothing. The conversation that followed could have easily gone bad if I had not learned an effective way of dealing with it.

What I was tasked with that day is the most commonly avoided management responsibility. Managers will find a thousand other things to do to avoid challenging conversations like this. And who can blame them? It is awkward, unnatural and can become explosively emotional. It is stressful for everyone involved. Employees are put on into a very uncomfortable position, and Managers need to remain steady in the ensuing storm. No wonder so many of these leaders avoid confronting bad behaviour or look the other way.?

It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it. The problem is, most managers are ill-equipped and poorly trained to swim in this pool of difficult feedback, and yet they’ve been thrown into the deep end. If left to our own devices to figure out how to do something, most of us will look at the examples we have seen in our own lives, but as they say, being well adjusted to a sick society is no measure of health! If the only examples you’ve seen are ineffective, your efforts will also suck. For example, for years, managers used the “Feedback Sandwich” technique where the negative behaviour was “sandwiched” between two positive behaviours. But if you asked a colleague who was just exiting her boss’s office how it went, she would probably say something like “I’m not sure. I think I am doing more positive things than negative things, so I guess I am doing well”.?So much for clarity!

There is a better way, one that has served me and my direct reports, and now it reportedly works well for my clients and their teams. It is a model that we adapted and created at Ubiquity Coaches, and it borrows bits and pieces of great advice and best practices from several sources. We call it the GUIDE Feedback Method, and it complements the GROW Coaching Method that I described in my last article. When you want to help someone become even better, you use the GROW Method, but if you want to help someone course correct, you use the GUIDE Method. The acronyms make sense. So let’s lift the proverbial hood to see how the GUIDE Feedback Method is wired and why it works so well…

GUIDE Feedback Method(TM)

Within this model, G.U.I.D.E. stands for:

G = Get Clear

U = Urge Discussion

I = Intention Sharing

D = Describe Behaviours

E = Effect or Impact

In the first phase, Get Clear (G), the Manager considers how they want to approach the conversation prior to meeting their employee (or colleague, etc). Getting clear means contemplation of the known facts and how they can be perceived as an ally. Without this step, the likelihood of an impulsive reaction is high, and impulsiveness rarely turns out well. So write down the facts and ask yourself how you can position yourself as an ally.

In step two, Urge the Discussion (U) respectfully. This is a step that I learned while working for Apple ten years ago. All Apple staff are expected to provide “Friendly Feedback” to each other if they see something concerning, and they are trained to begin these conversations by saying “I have some Friendly Feedback, is this a good time to talk?”. This shows respect and avoids triggering the other person’s fight or flight response. It allows the other person some sense of control. Even if they say it is not a good time to talk, the first person can reply “Sure. This is important though, so when would a better time be?”

In the third step of the GUIDE Feedback Model, you share the Intentions (I) that you set for yourself in the first step. It might sound something like this: “I know you care about your reputation for fairness, and I want to support you in any way I can…” In essence, you are sharing your intention to be an ally, not a combatant. And typically, your intentions are followed by the word “however…”.

To recap, up until now we have stopped to Get Clear (G) on our intentions to be an ally, Urged (U) a respectful discussion, and shared our Intentions (I). Just remember that these first three steps are not optional - they are necessary for effective feedback.?

With the fourth step of this model, we finally get to the meat and potatoes. When we Describe Behaviours (D), we should try to avoid triggering an emotional response by sticking to the facts. Rather than talking about how sad or disappointed you are, simply describe the specific, factual behaviours that you are aware of. Have notes prepared so you can stay on track and pinpoint where and when the specific behaviours happened.?

Our fifth step is to share the Effect (E) or Impact that their behaviours led to, or potentially could lead to. Voices do not need to be raised and accusations are not helpful. Again, our aim is to minimize an emotional reaction and stimulate logical course corrective thinking.?

Remember that the conversation could still go off the rails. The employee (or colleague) might interrupt you with their side of the story. If this happens, simply and calmly raise your hand and let them know that this is a difficult conversation and you have some points that you want to get through first, after which you will invite them to share their side of things. When they do, you might be presented with additional facts that you were not aware of. Remain open-minded and listen closely. You may have to revisit the last two steps, which is fair.

Now you've Described the Behaviour & Effect. Now is the time to wait patiently for their reply. Stop talking, bite your tongue and listen. Give them time to process and figure out how they will respond. They will typically reply in one of three ways…

A) If they are remorseful and admit to a mistake, shift to the GROW Coaching Method that we covered in our last article. In fact, if they regret their actions, you've already covered the Goal (G) and Reality (R). All you need to do is ask them to come up with Options (O) and share their intended actions, which are their Will (W) or Way Forward.

B) If they are undecided or on the fence, move into the GAIN Influence Model, which we will describe in our next article (stay tuned).

C) If they fight the feedback and are not willing to change their behaviour, you may need to resort to a Commanding Leadership approach: articulating Expectations, Consequences, Next Steps and gain a clear Agreement.?

Engaging in Difficult Feedback remains one of the most avoided responsibilities for people-leaders, but it doesn’t need to be so intimidating. With the right intentions, tools and facilitation approach, feedback can help well-meaning employees course-correct and realign with the team’s goals and objectives. The GUIDE Feedback Method is one approach that works in most instances. It’s an easy-to-remember system, presented in a logical sequence, that dovetails well with GROW Coaching and GAIN Influence, and it will ensure that your organization is helping everyone remain as successful as possible while offering the respect that every person deserves.?

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Terry Lipovski is the Founder of Ubiquity Coaches, an international alliance of over 25 coaches globally, aiming to help people thrive. He can be reached at [email protected] or at www.ExecutiveCoaches.ca