Help! It's Christmas!
Miles Salter considers the pressures of the annual holiday.
Christmas is a great time, right? Most of us enjoy the chance to see friends and family, to have a break, to have a few drinks. The festive season brings lots of good things with it, but it also carries one or two health warnings. We can find ourselves getting anxious or stressed at this time of year. Family ties can be great, but they can also be anxiety-inducing. (‘Four days with my husband’s parents – this is going to be tough!’).
?Christmas brings a bundle of pressures. You may feel pressure to look good, to spend money on relatives who don’t need it (‘those kids have got everything ALREADY!’), to travel three hundred miles to see a lonely Aunt, or a hundred other things. People often feel worn out in December, and Christmas has a way of crystalizing things. Divorce lawyers get a lot of extra calls in January. (‘He bought a terrible jumper! Again! He should know my size by now! He knows I can’t stand purple! Why doesn't he listen?). Here are a few things to bear in mind to help you survive the holiday season. Who knows, you might even enjoy it…
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1.???? This too shall pass. For all the fuss, December 25th is only one day in the calendar. It soon passes, so bear that in mind if it all feels a bit overwhelming.
2.???? Don’t forget your walking boots. If it’s all getting too much, get some fresh air. A walk is a great way to relax the body, and cold air has numerous benefits. An hour’s walk may help to clear the head.
3.???? Let expectations belong to others. You don’t have to be a certain way. Hold your ground, and don't be pressurised into being anything or doing anything that feels uncomfortable. If you don't want to wear a Christmas jumper (let's be honest, they are hideous), then don't. ‘Be yourself, no matter what they say’, sang Sting on ‘An Englishman in New York’ – and it is good advice.
4.???? Remember people who are less fortunate. We get so enmeshed with our concerns in the West. ‘First world problems’ take on a monstrous vitality at Christmas. (‘Dad gave the Samsung and I wanted the new Google phone! How can this be possible!’). Try to keep some perspective. There are people in the world without homes and without loved ones this Christmas. Keep this in mind.
5.???? Give to others – but don’t worry too much about how it will go down. Giving is a lovely thing to do, but keep it in perspective. In one family I know, every year somebody is disappointed with what they get. It’s funny and ridiculous at the same time. Gifts are great, but you can never be sure how somebody will react, so try to keep a sense of humour about it.
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6.???? Practice gratitude. Families always have their flash points, but try to be thankful for the time you have with somebody you love.
7.???? Sleep matters. When you are grouchy, everything feels worse. That little thing suddenly seems massive when you only got four hours’ rest. Get some sleep!
8.???? Laugh. Laughing is really good for us. Share a joke with a friend of family member – even those daft cracker jokes can be fun. Laughter strengthens our immune system, boosts our mood, and helps to heal us from stress.
9.???? Be in the moment. Be present. ‘Realise deeply that the present moment is all you really have’ – Eckhart Tolle. Try not to worry about the report or conference or change of job that is coming up in January. Enjoy what is in front of you right now – even if it is The Sound Of Music.
10.? Tell somebody how special they are. Take a moment to let somebody close to you ?know how much you love them. Our lives flash by, sometimes way too fast, and we don’t always take the time we should. Let somebody know how much you appreciate their kindness and good humour this Christmas.
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I hope this list of suggestions is helpful. Have a great Christmas, wherever you are and whoever you are with, and I hope you really enjoy it.
Miles Salter is a writer and musician based in York, UK. If you need help with a writing project, you can drop him a line at [email protected]? You can follow him at Miles Salter