Help is NOT a Four Letter Word

Welcome to a Grown Woman Power Play!

 The Power Play is a mini-lesson. Its purpose is to inspire women over 40 with quick tips and actions to support your bold, brilliant, badass career journey.

 During this lesson, I will share a quote, tie it to a Grown Woman Life principal, bring the concept to life, and close it out with some easy to action tips - your power plays.

"Accepting help is its own kind of strength."

Kiera Cass

Grown Woman Life Principle of the week: embrace humility

Perspective

This week I got a text from a friend of mine. The text requested a virtual vent session. We spent the next 45 minutes talking about life's struggles of the day. While she might have initiated the chat and we both benefited. There was listening and laughter and an hour later we both felt a lot better.

In the last 15 minutes or so of the chat, we were talking about how in these COVID-19 times, people seem much more willing to ask for help and give help. We both made a wish that this behavior change will continue post-pandemic.

 The question is, why does it take a pandemic to give us permission to ask for help? Why do we think that asking for help is an admission of weakness instead of a sign for strength? Why is it we feel the need to apologize when we find ourselves in a situation to ask for help but we are so willing to give it?

 Even the thought of asking for help can make some of us break out into hives. It's time to let that special brand of crazy go! Grown women embrace humility. They recognize the importance of not struggling in vain. Yes, you are smart enough to eventually find an answer on your own, but why waste the time? Despite what you might think, you are unlikely to be the only one struggling with the issue. And by the way, if you are hoping that the issue is just going to go away, not likely.

Grown women have the confidence to understand that their brand isn't tarnished or they aren't a failure because they ask for help. In fact, people might recognize the courage and confidence it takes to say, "I need help." People may appreciate that you are a human being just like them. The could appreciate the opportunity to support you.

Grown women realize that they aren't being an inconvenience when they ask for help, they are presenting an opportunity. They trust that people, for the most part, are good and willing to help and support. They realize there are necessary lessons to be learned on both sides.

Grown Women we need to stop treating the word help like it is a word we need to avoid as all costs. That asking for help is embarrassing.

This week's Power Play? Help is not a Four Letter Word

 Ask Yourself

• To get a bit of perspective, I want you to ask yourself a few questions.
•  Why do you continue to struggle instead of asking for help?
• What is it so difficult to ask for help?
• What happened the last time you asked for help?
• Do you begrudge it when others ask you for help?
• How did you feel the last time you received help (solicited or not solicited)?

 Take Action

• Claim your power by taking the time to do the following:
•  Write down three specific areas in which you can use some help.
• For each area where you need help, write down why you need the help.
• For each area where you need help, write down the specific help you need.
• For each area where you need help, write down why you are hesitant to ask for help.
• For each area where you need help, write down who you can ask for help.

 Once you identify who you can ask for help, think about how you can ask.

Start small, maybe ask your partner to wash the dishes tonight, ask the kids to pick up their shoes, ask your colleague to stop sending every email with that annoying exclamation point when it isn't truly urgent. The more you ask, kindly, humbly, respectfully. The easier it gets.

There are jerks in the world, don't let them discourage you. Recognize them for what they are and don't give them space and time. Above all else, don't overcomplicate it. Just ask.

Start with me, if I can help you in any way please let me know. You can help me by popping over to our groups on LinkedIn and Facebook and let me know how you asked for help this week.

To help you work through the lesson, feel free to go to our newly launched Resource Library and download the accompanying PowerPack.

 Make it an awesome and productive week. Remember to live boldly, showcase your brilliance, and be a badass.

PS - If you prefer audio, you can listen to this lesson on the Grown Woman Life podcast. Subscribe to our podcast, on your favorite podcast player so you don't miss a lesson.