Hello Cousins!
One of my favorite things of the past decade are the number of people who are starting their connections on social media with a salutation so simple, yet so profound, it says it all.
Dear Reader,
I didn't write a Thursday newsletter because it was a legal holiday. I don't celebrate holidays myself, but I know that many others do. I also love to hear that more leaders and influencers are recognizing the importance of not sending out work-related emails or information on people's time off.
As much as I love using social media to connect with the world, I also know that time away from the internet as a whole is a cathartic experience. When you fly solo, you tend to need it more than those who are well connected to the physical presence of others.
Respecting their time both on and offline, is a conscious effort.
Some of you are in other countries.
Some of you didn't celebrate yesterday's USA holiday at all (understandably).
Some of you don't care either way.
All of that is what you are up to. I can only contribute from my worldview.
I've been working on a major life decision. I think many of us are.
Who are we connected to?
Why are we connected?
What significance do we have to each other?
We don't have to accept anyone as an authority if we also don't like them or what they stand for. Nobody is 100% influential. Not a single person on earth, ever. Not even people who think they are the MOST important person in the universe. In their universe, maybe. To everyone else, they are a cousin, not a commitment.
Almost every HR professional or recruiter on social media openly talks about even though it's not 'allowed', how they immediately dig into an applicant's social media. They know they only look at a resume for only 4-seconds and will toss someone if there's a typo as if that person's life work has no significance at all. This is something they brag about. Would that insult you? If not, why not? Why do we just accept a thing as normal. Since when are we so careless with other human beings?
With that nonchalant attitude toward the person behind the paper, why would anyone care about a company represented by that entitlement? It denotes a complete lack of respect for people.
Some of these experts even hold titles such as People Managers or People Resources.
People in the people industry should at the very least, care about others who show interest in them.
None of us exist without others. No product. No investment. No decision. No institution or community.
There are the unwritten rules of what we're supposed to do in order to be accepted into the world, all based, I now realize, on neurotypical standards. On standards put in place by one type of person, rather than the diverse populations we all actually are.
All based on the rules written by people who have made themselves the leaders. Did you ever question that?
Why them?
Who do they think they are that they will assume that they are the ones making up the rules?
What if, just for a moment, you see yourself as the one to watch?
Their only goal is to be important. They make themselves the MOST important while calling others unimportant.
What if, just for a moment, you really critically look at the backstory of who they are in order to decide if they are deserving of the place where they are?
Did they play the platitude game better than you?
Did they do that thing that nobody talks about, but many do. You know the one. They only connect to people who will project their careers into the hierarchy pipeline, leaving a trail of other very qualified, interesting people in their dust.
Some of our biggest names in every industry are only there because of who they rubbed elbows with. Some of them are corrupt to the core. Others are as shallow a human as you will ever meet. Then, we all know that some are just one jail sentence away from getting caught at being absolutely corrupt.
You know what they say.
"Evil is bad that believes it is good" - KMM
We have to decide for ourselves who we are, why we are doing what we're doing, and most of all, what will it give us in exchange.
领英推荐
Our choice to focus on what we do for work is a majority of our waking hours.
Are we going to push through like it's labor pain?
Are we going to enjoy the journey for the journey's sake? Or, the end goal?
So much of what's going on with social media right now is all controlled by other people. All of it. Do we really want to give our power away because of that?
We can see it in the recently published works of some very influential professor/researchers. They are paid huge sums of money to report their 'research' but when you broaden your search, you realize that the agenda isn't as much about what they are reporting as it is about why they are reporting it, all while who else benefits from that reporting.
Take everything with a grain of sand. Sand in our hour glass. We all have one cousin.
I'm a big fan of original sources. Connections tell the real truth about what is what it is.
There is a journey we go through when we know the history. It's why I love the cousins idea. We are all cousins.
No matter your demographic, or belief system, or place in the hierarchy, and trust me, we are all being weighed, measured, decided upon before we ever open our mouths to speak, we can enter every room a conscious human being living an experience with other human beings.
So?
Why do I mention any of this and what does it have to do with you? Cousin?
Have you heard of Reesa Teesa. She's a cousin on TikTok who, in 50 10-minute chapters, told the story, Who The F Did I Marry. Her journey of realizing she was in a terrible marriage was so isolating, she turned to complete strangers on TikTok. The world followed her in supportive, loving ways. That was about a month now. Today, she is finishing up a trip to Paris she was given by a company (travel, hotels, flights, spas, shopping sprees) to go along with all the other supportive, loving gestures of good will to help her heal from her broken life.
@reesamteesa
I believe she picked up calling everyone cousin from The Bear (I hope you've seen it).
I don't care if you're positive all the time, I care if you're real all the time. Being real doesn't make others question your loyalty or love. Being over the top positive makes you seem like you're about to lie on the application.
We can use social media for healing purposes as well as connection.
It's not all bad. It's not all good. We spend too much time in one or the other. Opinions, that is. We spend too much time only seeing what we went looking for. There is no denying the bad, but there is no denying the good either.
Some other names from people the leaders can learn from? People I've been learning from for just about a year now.
@Keith_Lee125
@Ophilia (MamaTot)
@doctormike
@mrbeast
@UnderTheDeskNews (from my Alma Mater town, Buffalo, NY)
At some point, we have to question our own motives for being the way we are.
Every day we wake up, we can start a brand new journey.
While getting caught up in doing what we think we have to do, we forget to step back to reflect on doing what we want to do.
Here's to your new journey. I hope you find your tribe along the way. Those people who will be there for you, no matter what.
IMO< the journey began in a completely different place where it's ended up. I find that fascinating. So much more so than regretting anything along the way.
I wish more organizations would remember why they started their journey in the first place. A little self-reflection goes a long way.
I wish you well cousin.
KH