Hello to all those companies that say they care about me.

I am so sick of corporations and their social media campaigns that purport to care about me. Corporations are in the business of making money. I get that. Nothing wrong with that. But pretending that they care about me is absurd. 

A recent example: I get a call for Aetna Healthcare and they want to come to my home, take my blood pressure, and whatever else their certified nurse practitioner intends to do and ask about. I'm thinking, isn't this what my family doctor does for me? Isn't he someone who knows my medical history and can offer informed guidance to what I might do to take better care of myself? Oh, but there are services that we provide or can connect you with to improve your health and wellbeing. Services your doctor wouldn’t know about. So why the fuck aren’t you talking to my GP about this stuff and let him, someone I already trust, know about these awesome services?

I'm pretty confident that I can take care of myself and my needs without your help. I pay you money to obtain medical services at the lowest price point I can find and manage the paperwork etc. I love you no more than my wireless provider, which is to say not at all. I would listen to you if you simply said, "we have services that can help you spend less money on your healthcare and lower our costs and yours in doing so." I told the caller, "Aetna doesn't care about me as an individual. It's a big corporation in the business of making money. That's ok. But you don't really care about me. My wife cares about me. My children and siblings care about me. Close friends care about me. You care about runningan efficient, profitable business — and if your services can lower your costs — and maybe mine too — just say so. 

Interaction with corporations is transactional, not emotional or personal. Customer engagement should be honest — not a goofball pretense that your company knows anything about me other than what they need to know to provide better service in the interest of buttressing their bottom line. This need or desire is not bad or evil or pernicious — but admitting to it, understanding the people are human beings and pretending to “care” about them upends the understanding of what care means. 

I understand the need to make money. Everyone does. But wedding your need to make money to caring about me as an individual only serves to inflame my distrust of you. Be honest with me. You’ll get more traction.

?2019 John Hofmeister. All rights reserved. Yeah, I’m not Texas, but don’t mess with me.