At the Heart of Management: Should Love or Fear be the Guide?

The widespread adoption of strong, authoritative, and mistrusting management styles often results from a critical misunderstanding. There’s a prevalent belief that positive management is inherently weak. Numerous managers, in their attempts to be universally accommodating—being nice to everyone, listening, helping, and adapting—have faced disastrous outcomes. This fundamental misconception has paved the way for the emergence of domineering, bullying managers.

Positive management aligns with McGregor’s Theory Y, which views employees as motivated, responsible, and capable of self-direction. On the other hand, Theory X, based on fear and control, sees employees as lazy and needing constant supervision. These two philosophies are usually seen as exclusive, nice and soft on one hand, strong and mean on the other.

In reality, benevolent management doesn’t mean being soft. It involves a solid framework of rules and boundaries grounded in ethical principles. These rules must be enforced firmly to maintain order and allow trust to grow. Tolerating non-compliance can undermine a positive workplace culture. Being firm and authoritative in enforcing rules is actually crucial for creating a respectful and positive work environment.

Now, how can you enforce rules and embody ethics while being nice and trusting at the same time? That is the question. Balancing benevolence and authority requires clear communication and a good heart. Managers must constantly explain the reasons behind rules, demonstrate proper behavior, and coach employees to meet their job demands while having a good time. This is very similar to good parenting; just as you wouldn’t let a baby play with scissors, you shouldn’t allow behaviours that can harm the team.

Strong and authoritative managers get the same results very easily as they either let the baby play with scissors and learn by themselves, or they shout at the baby that will never ever play with anything again… And it works. But it also creates a fearful work environment that does not promote creativity and can lead to more sick leave, burnouts, and higher turnover. In today’s world, it is starting to be recognised as a problem.

Finally, how does one transition from a fear-based management philosophy to a positive, love-based management? It is simpler than it looks. We mentioned it before: Positive management must come from a good heart. Believe it or not, fear-based, strong and authoritative management comes from the manager’s own fears. It can be their fear of failure, of being disrespected or overruled, their basic fear of others, of the future, of lack… Fear makes them see others as a risk that needs to be mitigated, instead of a resource and a support in their task.

In the end, it all comes down to the simple choice between love and fear as the dominant force in your life. Positive management is based on the power of love, love of the job, love of people, love of life, and on trust as well, trust in people and in the future… This energy will bring peace at work, enthusiasm, and fun. It will foster creativity and productivity that will allow time for work-life balance and fulfilling professional relationships. It is a virtuous circle as much as fear-based management is a vicious circle.

By creating an environment where trust and respect are the norms, managers can achieve both individual and organizational success. The strategy is not about being lenient but about combining kindness with clear rules and firm enforcement. The fear-based control of Theory X has been polluting our work environment for ages and this balance, rooted in McGregor’s Theory Y, in love and trust, offers a viable alternative.