Into the Heart of Habits

Into the Heart of Habits

Why ‘Love Mondays’? Mondays are usually anything but lovable. Studies show it’s typically our week’s low point and Guinness World Records has even dubbed it the "worst day of the week”. So I aim to provide a 4-minute caffeine hit of content to fire up the other 10,076 minutes of your week and stave off the Monday malaise. Don’t just live Mondays, Love Mondays!


Those of you who know me well, or who’ve seen me present, will know I’m obsessed with habits. It fascinates me that more than 40% of our daily activity is estimated to be habitual, and yet we have a tendency to overlook the marginal gains that are available to us by merely tweaking our repeated behaviour. Success more often than not emerges from consistent habits, not isolated, grand transformations, so if we can work out how to make small changes and set them on autopilot, we can dramatically improve our results.?

While many of us discuss habits and goals at the year's start, the current moment is just as fitting for this topic. As we approach the year's end, how are your goals coming along? Is there still room for progress?

And, given my passion for habits, I'm especially excited that I'll be hitting the road next week alongside the habit guru James Clear to host and moderate his Atomic Habits Live Tour so what better time than now to delve even deeper into the world of habits.


Small Changes, Big Wins

Psychologists have uncovered that our habits are deeply ingrained in our neural pathways. Initially, when we're learning a new behaviour, our brain's front-seat driver, the prefrontal cortex, is in charge, helping us make conscious choices. Then, with enough practice, that behaviour gets moved to the back seat, becoming a habit that just plays out automatically.?

A common pitfall I've noticed (and I'm guilty of it too!) is setting overly ambitious targets when we’re chunking goals down into habits. This strategy often backfires, hurling us into the high demands of success right from the get-go, obstructing the steady rhythm required to embed a habit deep within us. Adding to the complexity, our willpower can be quite the trickster. Just like muscles, both our determination and motivation can wear out and fatigue (cue end-of-day indulgences or skipped gym sessions). This means they don't always perform at their peak. This dynamic creates a tug of war between enduring goals and instant gratification, frequently tilting the balance in favour of the latter.

“A short practice that you do every day is better than a long practice you keep putting off to tomorrow” - Kelly McGonical, psychologist, New York Times best-selling author, and Stanford lecturer

So how can we make our goals more achievable and our habits more sustainable?

Start small and establish some MVHs: In his book ‘Atomic Habits ’, James discusses the concept of Minimum Viable Habits (MVHs). This approach centres on the notion that successful behavioural change can be achieved by breaking down new goals into the smallest possible components. Think of MVHs as a two-minute preview of the larger habit – a miniature action that ignites the spark to initiate the habit. Due to their non-threatening and non-disruptive nature, MVHs don't trigger resistance from our brain. Once on the trajectory of a new routine, these habits can be gradually adjusted or incrementally expanded at consistent intervals.?

Get your reps in!: A 2021 study published in the British Journal of Health Psychology, found that people need an average of 59 days for a new habit to become second nature. However, research has found that repetition, more than days on a calendar, plays a pivotal role in etching positive habits into our minds. It’s all about hitting that repeat button until your habit seamlessly transitions to autopilot mode.

Embrace the ‘never miss twice’ rule:? Kelly McGonigal , Stanford psychologist and author of 'The Willpower Instinct ,' highlights that a key reason willpower falters and habits fade is due to lacking a setback strategy. “In that moment when you fail, often the first instinct is to push the goal away,” says McGonigal. “It’s so uncomfortable to be in that place of self-doubt or self-criticism and guilt.” McGonical points out that self-compassion is much more motivating than self-criticism. Remember, we're all human – a single miss isn't a catastrophe, but the second miss triggers a shift in patterns. It's progress, not perfection, that truly matters.



Image: Buffer.com

In the end, the journey of forming habits is a dance of strategy, adaptation, and understanding our human nature. Through these incremental shifts, we're sculpting the path toward our best selves:

  1. Be more strategic: Rather than aiming for instant overhauls, focus on strategically weaving small changes into your routine.

  1. Be more reflective: Regularly evaluate your habits. What's working well? What needs tweaking? Adjust as necessary.

  1. Be more forgiving: If you miss a step, forgive yourself. Avoid dwelling on it and instead focus on moving forward with kindness.

  1. Be more celebratory: Embrace small victories along the way. Celebrate each achievement, regardless of its size.


Thank you for being a part of Love Mondays More. If you’d like more leadership learning and inspiration you can:

  • Join the Love Mondays Movement: Experience the power of small yet impactful daily insights delivered right to your inbox. Love Mondays is designed to provide you with bite-sized, actionable wisdom that will help you love the week you're about to lead.
  • Listen to My Free Audio Training: Access my top three transformative concepts that have the potential to reshape your life as a leader. This is your chance to gain practical tools and strategies that lead to lasting change.
  • Explore How I Can Help Transform Your Business: From immersive workshops to tailored leadership programs, my expertise revolves around cultivating an internal culture of leadership, empowering your organisation to confidently navigate today's evolving operational landscape. Our programs equip your team to proactively address emerging challenges with resilience and innovation.


Julianna Shearn

Owner, SHEARN HR LEGAL HUMAN RESOURCE + RECRUITMENT

1 年

For me Holly, it has been starting serious Ishta Yoga at Tamara Yoga in Perth, WA, the year my beautiful Mum died tragically after a horrible pancreatic cancer late diagnosis in July 2019 and my Pranayama Breathing has been the Habit to stick above all, since then!????????????????♀?????????♂?

Karin Rex

instructional designer | writer | elearning developer | virtual facilitator | geek! | [email protected]

1 年

1,351 days ago I started SMALL by deciding that, instead of trying to decide IF I was going to get on my Peloton that day, I only needed to decide WHAT TIME I was getting on the bike. The power of habit is STRONG! I have not missed a workout day in more than 3 years. A small decision that has had a huge impact on me. Lucky for me I started this before the pandemic because I don't think I would have been able to kick start such a feat during it. I'd had the Peloton for 2 years prior to starting this, but only rode sporadically because I always found a way to talk myself out of it each day. Now, it's just WHEN not IF, which I find much easier. Thanks for this Monday reminder!

Syed Sajjad Rizvi

Regional Sales Manager at Teletec Nokia/Thuriya

1 年

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Dana Johnston, MS, CMP

Bestselling Author | Award Winning Partnership Visionary | Chief Mental Health Role Model | Passionate 4-Day Week Advocate

1 年

In the last several months, I began and quickly adopted a daily lunchtime meditation routine. It transformed my afternoons by making me more calm and focused on my most important priorities. I even finish the day with increased energy and peace. The positive feelings encourage me to pause for 5 or 10 minutes even on the most frantic afternoons.

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