Healthy mind and body begins with connections and thrives on doing less

In the past, I have never been one to use the term “busy” to describe myself. Although, I realize I am someone with a propensity for action, rumination and doing. By doing, I mean a state of activity and a desire to constantly achieve, get things done and have a sense of accomplishment.

I have an active mind that is continually thinking about innovative ideas and creating new things and while I avoid the description, I actually have a long track record of being busy. Over the last year, I have had to come to grips with my proclivity to overdo and avoid just being. By just being, I mean a mode where the mind has nothing to do and is focused on what is happening in the current moment, fully present and aware of what is happening around me.

I have a tendency to fill time and space with multi-tasking and I have an orientation towards action. Previously, I was that person in line at the grocery store, on my phone shopping on Amazon Prime or with headphones talking with someone as the checker was scanning my purchases. And, I was not present to what was going on around me nor who was around me. I was missing out on life.

Perhaps I was lucky to get a wake-up call. If I didn’t get that call, I would likely still be on my perpetual wheel of doing. I consider myself fortunate to have received the call and to have figured out that less doing, more being is a preferred state for me. It is like the contrast on the TV – less doing and more being sharpens the picture and makes it clearer.  

My first step towards less doing has been to put my phone down. I can get super busy with my phone. And, because it is portable I can do this every place I go! When I put down my phone, I saw more of what was around me, like the contrast on the TV. And, I learned I was missing so much. I noticed I was missing out on connecting with others at every turn.

As I intervened on my phone use and addiction, a simple technique I learned was to connect with strangers and savor what I now call “micro-connections.” Micro-connections for me became a conversation with the cashier in the grocery store and short chats in elevators and hallways. While short in duration, these conversations went beyond niceties and small talk of a “how are you” into what is going on around us. They served as short yet meaningful connections and I feel a sense of fulfillment and happiness every time I experience them.

While micro-connections might appear to be more busy and more doing, I don’t experience them in that way. Rather, they are fulfilling for me and as my connections with others increase, so does my overall sense of being present to what is going on around me. As I become more present, my sense of health and wellbeing increases. The cycle continues, I feel more comfortable slowing down and experiencing more connections and a sense of “oneness” between us all. 

Beyond these micro-connections and moments with strangers, meeting people who are not yet my friends, spending time with my family, and having experiences with friends and co-workers has taken on heightened importance in my life. I am more present for everyone and for every experience and in turn, others are more present for me. I cannot think of anything better than being present in the moment, of "being" and REALLY experiencing what is happening. From my perspective, it is what we all need and it makes my life and my health thrive as it has never thrived before.

May you have your own micro-connections, starting today. -Meagan