#HealingPower of #EstateAdmin #MomsThings #MuseumOfYourLife #PreserveYourLegacy #Artifacts #BeyondEstatePlanning

Grammys?, wedding rings, vintage cars, and family silverware. I have had clients name all of these items as “specific bequests” in a Last Will and Testament (which means intentionally identifying a specific valuable to be bequeathed to a specific person when you die). Yet most people when they die will leave behind many more personal items than the top few “stand-out” valuables they bequeath. Further, even heirs with a right to inherit such items may not want them. 3 Tips for distributing your loved one’s things from my role as my mom’s Executor:

The Little Things. When my mom passed last year, she left in her estate hundreds of her and my late father’s possessions. My mom elected not to bequeath specific bequests but wanted us kids to divide up her possessions as we saw fit. My siblings and I used an excellent silent-auction type of software called FairSplit to “bid” on the many items in the estate. Eventually we each hit our capacity of artwork, furniture, and Christmas ornaments, yet there were still many viable items such as small antiques, sets of dishes, and medical equipment to be dealt with. As Executor, I could have justified simply giving away these remaining items. Yet I hoped to find “homes” for them, so to either pass on their stories, save someone else money (by not having to buy the same item brand new), or earn income for the estate. What happened next surprised me.

Connecting.? I took a chance and selectively gifted some items. I left a gift bag outside the front door of a neighbor who had loyally left us baked goods during mom's many hospitalizations. She excitedly called to say she was dancing around her kitchen wearing Mom’s fuzzy slippers and scarf. I started posting items for sale online, skeptical if there would be an audience. In fact, I ended up in more than one tearful embrace with strangers who connected with mom’s kindred spiritedness through her things. A kind man cradled in his arms her aunt's rusty 1900’s miniature Singer sewing machine as a precious “find”. An older couple sent me a photo “with many blessings” of mom’s glass paperweight in its new home on their desk after they’d driven an hour to collect it. A tired young husband gave me a smile of such gratitude when I gave him my mom’s resilient shower chair for his wife, soon to return home after a sudden hospitalization.

Collective Soul. ?The estate did earn some money from these transactions (some more than I expected, some less; all a fraction of their original value), but the most important lesson for me was how casting these items into the world lead not just to income for the estate, but to acts of sharing the joys and struggles of the human condition. Understandably, not every Executor would have had the time or interest in this process, but as a daughter tasked with preserving my parents' assets (and memories), it was incredibly rewarding to me. I could imagine mom hitting it off with each person who stepped forward to claim one of her former possessions. This final distribution of Mom's estate served not only as a continuation of her legacy but also a balm to my own grieving heart and a reminder of how connected we all are.

If your legacy is important to you, commit to one small step today to organize your estate as you envision and leave some form of road map for your Executor as to your family and personal items. Things which have no price tag may end up being what your heirs treasure most.

You Took Control in Life. Why Stop Now??

?2015-2025 ?Melissa M. Allen, Attorney-At-Law??Dreamcounsel, Inc. DREAMCOUNSEL? is a federally registered service mark. DISCLAIMER. This post reflects the opinions of Melissa M. Allen, Esq., is intended for informational and educational purposes only, and does not constitute legal advice.