Healing Through Language: An Exploration of Understanding, Innerstanding, and Overstanding by Dr. Cherry: Quite Contrary #ceowhisperher

The Journey of Understanding

Imagine a client, we'll call her Ava, a project manager overwhelmed by her team's underperformance and looming deadlines. She describes her frustration and the details of her team's dynamics in a session. This is where we start with Understanding—the entry point of our coaching journey. As a coach, I listen attentively to Ava's description, grasping the surface level of her challenges. Understanding is crucial because it lays the groundwork for deeper exploration. It involves noting the explicit details that Ava shares about her work environment and her team's issues.

Delving into Innerstanding

As our sessions progress, we move deeper into Innerstanding. Here, I encourage Ava to look inward, beyond the immediate frustrations. Through guided reflection, Ava reveals that her stress isn't just about the project deadlines but is deeply tied to her fear of appearing incompetent. This fear isn't new—it's a shadow from her early career days when she struggled to establish herself. Innerstanding helps Ava connect her current stress to these deeper emotional currents. It's about tapping into the internal landscape—what feelings, motivations, or values are influencing her behavior. This introspection is pivotal because aligning one’s actions with inner beliefs can pave the way for meaningful and sustainable changes.

Elevating to Overstanding

Finally, we elevate our perspective to Overstanding. This holistic view allows Ava and me to see her situation as part of a larger picture. We analyze how the company culture, her team's diversity in working styles, and the industry pressures contribute to her stress. Overstanding involves integrating all sensory data and understanding the broader dynamics at play. It's akin to viewing the situation from a helicopter, seeing the interconnections and patterns that influence Ava’s professional life. This broader perspective is invaluable as it helps Ava anticipate potential challenges and recognize opportunities for strategic changes, perhaps even fostering a more supportive team environment or seeking organizational changes that support mental well-being.

Narrative Impact in Coaching

Using these three layers—Understanding, Innerstanding, and Overstanding—enables coaches to guide their clients through a comprehensive exploration of their experiences. Each layer builds upon the next, offering a deeper, more nuanced understanding of their challenges and behaviors.

For fellow coaches and clients alike, adopting this approach means moving beyond mere problem-solving. It involves developing a language that heals, a dialogue that transforms. It's about creating a space where clients like Ava can not only identify and tackle immediate problems but also connect with their deeper selves and the larger world around them. This journey not only clears the path for immediate solutions but also fosters long-term resilience and fulfillment.

In practice, this means coaches need to skillfully navigate between these layers, adjusting their approach based on the client's readiness to dive deeper. For clients, engaging in this process requires openness and trust, qualities that are nurtured through compassionate and patient coaching.

Ultimately, this approach does more than address professional challenges—it transforms how individuals perceive themselves and their interactions with the world. It empowers them to step out of their own way, embrace their vulnerabilities, and harness their unique strengths in navigating life's complexities.