"Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives." — Akshay Dubey
Emma G - TEDx Speaker, Musician and Youth Empowerment coach
Survivor of 10 brain surgeries, and now singing, speaking, and coaching about music and mental & emotional health. ??
Happy Thursday, friends!
As we get deeper into this new academic year here in the States, and I work with more vocal and songwriting clients, I keep noticing something: my vocal clients always tend to try and imitate their favorite singers. Similarly, I've lost count of how many of my clients [especially teens] who have said "they want to write a song similar to [insert artist here - but I often hear Sabrina Carpenter or XXXTentacion as examples]".
And I get it.
We look up to these people. We think they're geniuses or are/were living the life of our dreams, but here's the thing:
It's easy to get caught up in someone else's story that we forget about our own.
We hear a song that resonates with us, and we begin to identify with the lyrics, the pain, the triumph — but we have to remember, that's someone else's reality. While we may share experiences with others, each of us is unique in how we process adversity.
Take me, for example. I live with hydrocephalus — a condition that affects 85 people per 100,000 worldwide. Sure, it's not many people, but it's easy to lump us all together, right? Wrong. Meeting me, you'd probably never know - unless you've seen my TEDx Talk ;-).
but That’s because hydrocephalus can present itself in so many different ways. My challenges are different from the next person's, and that’s why it's so crucial for each of us to be the one holding the pen when it comes to understanding and working through our own trauma.
Of course, having a coach or guide along the way can help, but the first and most important step? Self-awareness.
For me, songwriting has been my lifeline in this process. Through music, I’ve found the clarity and strength to acknowledge my pain and begin healing. Here are three songs I’ve written that have played a major role in my own healing journey:
1. Be Brave This song is all about dismantling fear and leaning into resilience. I wrote it when I was grappling with the uncertainty of moving to Washington, D.C., and it became my anthem for facing ALL of my life's challenges and changes head-on.
2. From the Ashes This one helped me rebuild after hitting some of my lowest points - particularly when it came to figuring out how to navigate the pandemic. It’s about finding strength in what seems like failure, and knowing that sometimes we need to burn it all to the ground in order to rise up stronger.
3. Save You From Yourself This was a breakthrough song all about tough self-love. It's a reminder that no one else can "save" us. We have to take responsibility for our own healing, even when it’s difficult.
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If you’d like to read more about my personal experience with music and healing, I’ve shared a deeper dive in my recent blog post: "Can Music Heal You? How to Truly Heal, One Song at a Time".
So what's this got to do with you?
Good question. I wanted to share this because music isn't just about me - it's about ALL of us. And if you're wondering how you can use music to process trauma or adversity, here are three tips that have worked for me:
Three Takeaways to Apply to Your Own Life
1. Write your own story Instead of just listening to other people’s songs, try writing your own. It doesn’t need to be perfect. It’s about processing your thoughts and feelings in your own words. As Abraham Lincoln said: “The best way to predict the future is to create it.”
2. Use music to identify emotions Whether you're writing lyrics or just listening to songs, pay attention to how the music makes you feel. It can help you understand what emotions you're working through and give you clarity.
3. Create a healing playlist Build a playlist of songs that help you release your emotions — whether it’s crying, reflecting, or even feeling empowered. Sometimes hearing those words set to music can help unlock things inside of us. Here's my own personal playlist that I play whenever I want to embrace ALL that I'm feeling - especially when it comes to [hopefully] using those songs to help me lean into positivity.
If you’re interested in more tools for using music as a way to process adversity, I’d love for you to check out my blog post and consider joining me over on Patreon. Your support helps me to be able to continue creating and sharing content about healing through music.
Let’s keep holding the pen and writing our own stories, one song at a time.
Have an amazing day on purpose,
Emma G
P.S. Don't forget - this is where you can catch me this month - and if you can't make it, make sure to hold November 10 free for my birthday celebration at DC9!