He Doesn't Want a Relationship, Don't Give Him Benefits ……during Lockdown …part 37

" Sex and courtship are not the same thing."

Is it really that hard for people to understand?

Do you really believe that if you have sex with someone, you disrespect them?

or that if someone finds you sexually attractive, they are disrespecting you?

Do you really believe that to respect a person, you have to be in a relationship with them?

Realize that you and this man see things from completely different perspectives. You see sex as an emotional binder that is part of a relationship......but he sees it as sex. Period.

The chemistry is real, the feelings are there, the conversation is on point, and the lust is unstoppable. It seems you have it all… all but him. 

He says he’s not ready for a relationship. He’s giving you crumbs and he’s always keeping you at arm’s length.

He hasn’t let you all in and is keeping his options open. 

On the other hand, he can’t stand the thought of you with somebody else.

He wants commitment from you, but he can’t offer the same in return. And it’s time you put a stop to it. 

Of all the threats we know during this time, the COVID-19 pandemic is most like a very rapid version of climate change—global in its scope, erratic in its unfolding, and unequal in its distribution. And like climate change, there is no easy fix. Our choices are to remake society or let it be remade, to smooth the patchworks old and new or let them fray even further.

Cut off boyfriend benefits if he’s not your boyfriend. 

If you have greater feelings for him than he has for you, you don’t want him to consider you as something casual. 

Think about it. Why would he be interested in a relationship when he’s getting everything for free?

The emotional bond you have with him may be the death of you. 

Maybe not actual death, but emotional slaughter is guaranteed.

Your heart breaks just as easily when there are labels as when there are none. 

You spend time with somebody, emotions evolve, you get attached beyond your wildest dreams.

You text regularly, you hang out often, you have your inside jokes, you know each other’s thoughts and the way you smell in the morning. 

It’s not just about sex; it’s so much more. That’s why the situation you find yourself in hurts just as breaking up would.

You find yourself wanting more and reality slap is that he might not have more to give. 

So, be the one who calls the shots. 

Tear him down from that pedestal you placed him on if he isn’t ready to treat you like a queen. 

He is your priority, your number one, the center of your universe, your king, but if he can’t treat you the same, then he’s not worthy of you. 

If he’s not ready to step up and make you completely his, he’s not worthy of your time. 

Don’t allow more months or years to pass without being truly happy. 

Happiness comes and goes from your life, but it never stays long.

You feel like he has power over it and all he’s giving you are mere moments of unbelievable joy, only to spoil them with much larger periods of uncertainty. 

Disclaimer: The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate. 

Thank you …There are days where there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for you, and then there are others where a text back, a simple “How are you?” and making plans to see you are too much effort. 

His mind and his heart are inconsistent, and they’re making a mess out of your life. 

He gives you hints that things might change. He talks about his feelings for you. He talks about the future and you make plans together. 

Then, out of the blue, he’s nowhere to be found. He’s “too busy,” he’s with his friends night after night, he has no time for you until it’s convenient for him. 

It’s disrespectful, to say the least, and it has to stop. 

What you need to remind yourself of is that you deserve better from him, from life, from yourself. 

From yourself primarily because it’s all in your hands. You have to have standards.

You can’t put up with someone’s crappy behavior and low investments. 

Love yourself as much as you would want somebody else to love you and everything will fall into place. 

You deserve things from him if he’s expecting relationship benefits. You deserve to be labeled as his girlfriend.

You deserve respect, loyalty, and effort. You deserve more than half of his heart. 

Life owes you a thing or two as well. It owes you peace in your heart and love in your life. You just need to reach for them. 

You deserve a committed relationship where all your efforts are reciprocated and you aren’t the only one making them.

You deserve to be loved back and not be the one who loves for two. 

So, if he isn’t ready to be in a relationship, cut off all the benefits and inform him you’re not ready for a non-relationship either.

Want to add word or two?

This means that if you go over there late at night and only end up being intimate before leaving, he really only wants to be friends with benefits. ... Just because he wants to get you naked doesn't mean he wants you in a relationship. He just means he wants to see you naked.

One other way of putting it is that these people basically just use each other to get lucky and nothing else. And as long as both parties know this is the case, it’s perfectly fine. The one thing that can be a bit of a struggle with these cases, however, is that sometimes it’s hard to tell if a guy wants to be friends with benefits or if they want something more. You may think they want to date you when in reality, they just want to be friends with benefits.

Your comment ….? 

This is a huge sign that he wants to keep your relationship strictly in the bedroom. If the two of you never actually go on dates or even walk around in public together at all, then he just wants to be friends with benefits.

 Normally, if a guy is trying to win you over and make you his, he’ll want to take you all over town just to show you off and have experiences with you. So the fact that this guy is just keeping everything in the bedroom is a sure sign that he just wants all of the intimate benefits of a relationship and nothing else. If you two are just taking things slow and you’re not ready to take things out in public, it can be a little confusing to tell. The best way to figure this part out is to talk about future dates.

This is really common in a relationship that is only sex-based and that’s why it’s a huge sign that he only wants to be friends with benefits.

When you’re actually in a relationship or when a guy wants to be in a relationship with you eventually, they’ll keep in touch every single day because they want to know about your life and how things are going for you

Guys who only want to be friends with benefits don’t really care and will only contact you when they want you to come over and sleep with them. It may sound a little harsh, but that’s how friends with benefits relationships are.

 If you go more than a day or two without hearing from him, then chances are he only sees your relationship as something to be kept in the bedroom and it means nothing more.