Have a Conversation

Last week, I wrote about?reaching out to your Jewish friends ?and letting them know that you are thinking of them and that you care. Today, let’s focus on having a civil conversation with someone you may disagree with.?

I received an Instagram message from a former employee named Anderson, who happens to be Black and happens to be pro-Palestine. He wrote to me because, “My entire feed is filled with pro-Palestine voices, except for yours.” He expressed that he wanted to meet and get a better understanding of where I am coming from.

Typically when people reach out at random, I give them my?pro-bono office hours . However, as a former employee with a super interesting topic to discuss, I gave him my availability for the next couple of days. Two days later we had a Zoom. I had not talked much with him when he was an employee. He hadn’t worked directly for me and the company was already pretty large at the time, but I did remember he had done good work for us.

I found him to be extremely thoughtful, considerate, and civil in his communication with me. During the call, I laid out my perspective, which I thought best represented the pro-Israel, Jewish-American perspective. I said that the loss of any life is heartbreaking to me, but that in general Israelis want peace and Hamas wants war and death. From my perspective, I shared, it sure seemed like Hamas wants death for all of Israel and perhaps all Jews of the western world. (And perhaps the entire Western world.) ?I said how surprised I that there are so many pro-Hamas “freedom fighters” in the US. He told me he believed that many young people are looking only at headlines and at their peer groups’ feeds. We only had twenty minutes to talk but I walked away feeling inspired about the possibilities of bridging the seemingly enormous gap in beliefs that Americans have about the war.

The reality is that many pro-Israel, and pro-Palestine supporters feel very strongly and it seems often uninterested in having civil conversations with the other side. What if that changed? What if similar conversations to the one I had with Anderson could happen more frequently?? What if every single person reading this reached out to someone they know and respect who has a strong contrasting opinion, and they had a civil conversation to understand the other side. Could conversations help bridge the gap in understanding?

I am not sure. I continue to be an idealist and continue to be disappointed by the realities of people. Yet I remain hopeful. If you read this and you are brave enough to have a conversation with the other side, I invite you. If you are looking for a staunch pro-Israel supporter to have a conversation with, I am available. If you are pro-Israel and looking to have a conversation with a reasoned, pro-Palestine supporter, let me know and I can connect you.

Contrast this wonderful conversation I had with an online “conversation” yesterday.?Alexandria-Ocasio Cortez posted on Instagram , urging an immediate ceasefire. I commented “Unfollowing, and more importantly will never vote, support, or donate to you again. A cease fire now would allow Hamas to restock and attack Israel again, and again, and again.”

Twenty minutes later I had 264 notifications. I received many comments attacking me and even attacking my family. I had cruel comments on previous posts, from months ago on pictures with my family. Two people called me a murderer. I posted a civil comment and people on the other side responded viciously.

We need to have civil conversations. We cannot advance any causes without having civil conversations. Perhaps we can begin to better understand each other one chat at a time.?

_________________

If I give you one video to watch this week, please look at?Bari Weiss' recent Federalist Society speech . It’s long but worth it. She does a masterful job of reviewing the conflict and moreover, reviewing the divide that has occurred in the last two decades in the western world. Most important, she suggests how to solve the growing challenge of people being unable to discern good from evil and right from wrong. This, the same week that?Osama Bin Laden’s hate-filled “Letter to America” ?trended on Tiktok as hundreds of American young people essentially said he was a pretty good guy after all. Yes, you read that right!!!

I continue to pray for all innocent lives. I pray for the immediate return of all of the hostages, the destruction of Hamas, and a ceasefire / peace in the Middle East.

And I pray for more civil dialogue between humans.