Hardship, the Pen within your Unique Leadership Signature

"Tis dearness only, that gives everything its value". "I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection" "Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue principles until death".

I've always appreciated Thomas Paine's quote above, which centers on the value of freedom, "a celestial article" he avers, "that should be very highly rated". Highly rated, he notes, because it comes at ENORMOUS COST. Sacrifice on the field of battle. Time spent nurturing and protecting it. Standing firm in principle for her. And individual unwavering resolve to support his fellow citizens, even to the point of personal loss, shines freedom's defense, as special.

Anything, we come to love, to hold "dear", is something that doesn't come "cheaply". Thus, any "highly rated" area, rife in struggle, is place where all people may identify.

Today, rather than focusing on freedom's struggle, I would like you to consider hardship of ANY KIND, and how it shapes/defines us. How you can make it source of the value you give to others through your personal, and unique leadership voice? Your unique story drives your impact as a leader. Your Lessons learned almost always emerge from the hardships that YOU persevered THROUGH.

How will you package them for those in your circle, whom you seek to reach profoundly, with reason, purpose, integrity, guideline example, and more "dearness"? Telling your unique story highlights the lessons and the distinct principles, that arose from them.

They may be replicated, and even stick in your follower's lives. Your hardships conquered, speak to your character and AUTHENTICITY. They make you special. Indeed, they are the PEN WITHIN YOUR UNIQUE LEADERSHIP SIGNATURE.

Before I go further, in making the short points that I hope to leave you with, I want to thank "linked in". By chance, 3 contacts from my distant past (with whom my main link, is the vehicle Linked In:)....contacted me this week and inspired me on this "hardship subject".

Andy and Stacie, and especially, you, Kirk Lum, helped me to remember leadership lessons from my past, and more importantly, my belief that being a good leader, simply means telling your story and the "how's: and the "why's" of your outcomes. Leadership starts in offering ones "special sauce" in living life, the individual reflection on overcoming, and contextualizing effective values for challenges that people endure. Teams are cemented through shared success and in using common values.

Reader, your stories paint the most vivid picture and they help you to navigate the course and provide VISION for critical accomplishment required through the journey. Your tales set a culture that insures excellence can thrive.

For an operational definition, let's call "hardship" suffering of ANY KIND, in an area that you hold dear in life". Was it your personal freedom? Perhaps, the loss of your home? The job you loved, and can't imagine living without its purpose? Maybe, you experienced death of your parent, or of your child, or your brother or a sister? Did you lose your spouse or significant other in death, divorce, or breakup? Was your faith challenged? Or, was it your health, that was so critical to your lifestyle, that began to wane? Did you remedy problems with proactive change? Did a lifetime of wealth disappear in short order, and your sense of safety evaporate with it? Did life suddenly become devoid of its natural spark, and you wandered into mundane malaise, that neither satisfied nor animated your soul? What happened to your family through this COVID pandemic? How did you persevere?

Did you absolutely LOVE the person or thing that was at risk through your hardship? If you could change the outcome, would you do it? Yes? No doubt then; the person, the thing, the resources, the temporal comfort, a purposeful pursuit lost, the anchor, the grounding ---was something dear. The loss may have created a crucible moment in your life.

It's right here, at the hardship, that we should package, contextualize, and share the story with others, in right timing, to power LEADERSHIP IMPACT.

Friendship forms from shared vulnerability. Most hardship creates vulnerability and telling it, can deliver cultural glue, holding the team together through difficult times. It will make the difference in inspiring followers, to keep charging forward, and enthusiastically prevailing.

You won't necessarily have to convey your hardship story. It can be another person's powerful account. And you can know many of these through friends life circumstances, and through avid reading of others accounts. Think Victor Frankle in Man's Search for Meaning. The truth is, many famous accounts, can often provide inspiration to help others navigate the course. Harriet Tubman, Anne Frank, Erik Weihenmayer, and even Rudy Ruetigger have been powerful motivators of incredible resolve for me.

Your stories are best and others accounts will also be helpful. How can we turn our hardship stories into powerful leadership teachers? Similarly, how can we create victories, spiraling good feeling that percolates through success to inspire people through these recitals?

Consider that hardship is the universal requirement of the human condition. Things will go wrongly if you live long enough. EVERYONE relates with hardship. The fruit on the vine is "scar built values" that is shaped in "response"to hardship.

Hardship impacts both the wealthy and the poor. It confronts the young and the old, woman and man. It hits every race, creed, and citizens of all countries. In The Adversity Challenge, Stoner and Gilligan noted that "the human condition guarantees that each life will encounter natural and largely unpredictable trauma. Leadership by its very nature is ENTWINED with adversity"

Perhaps Warren Bennis and Robert Thomas work in, The Crucibles of Leadership, most clearly conveys the leadership transformation that hardship guides. They identify "triggers", and "critical life events", that can become "crucibles" through which life altering change is realized. Elements interact within hardships where purpose is cemented, shaping the leaders unique guidance touch upon his/her followers. It moves a leader far from the shallow, and into the depths in human connectedness.

Bennis describes it this way "crucibles are events that are transformative experiences through which individuals come to a NEW SENSE OF IDENTITY, especially after DEEP SELF REFLECTION, that forces leaders to question WHO THEY REALLY ARE and WHAT REALLY MATTERS to them."

The two scholars of Organizational Leadership interviewed 40 top business leaders and discovered that each of them identified a story from their lives, of an unplanned, traumatic experience, that modified their thinking. The event altered them to the point of developing distinct leadership capabilities. More than any other life experience, each of these leaders mentioned "hardship" as being the crucial element in the formation of their leadership.

The lesson is this. Know your personal crucible. Write down the converging elements that led to this hardship. Evaluate how you overcame. What principles were woven to your core through that challenge? What are the bedrock values and faith that inspired your perseverance? Write down your story. How is it relevant to the potential life experiences of the people you lead? How can you contextualize your knowledge of "making it through" and "coming out stronger on the side", as a meaningful metaphor for your followers experience? Can they relate to your crucible and the learnings within? How will that correlate to challenges that confront them now? They will relate more closely to you, especially if it is your hardship story and they feel your authentic self through the message. Alternatively, another's crucible account that powerfully moved your personal commitment to your leadership life, will also influence those closest to you.

What do we do with crucible learnings and our stories that emerge from them? And then what strategies can we use to share that leadership with others?

1. Know your crucible moments and the values that flowed from them. Share these, especially the "overcoming" within your journey. Authentic self comes through here.
2. Read Avidly, about the hardships of others. So much learning for each us, comes at the intersection of these foundational stories. Most every time, we can find a link that applies to best practice in our own lives. Share what you know from your reading. When you give what you know, you are loving others, growing others, and providing solutions.
3. Communicate and over-communicate! Not the stories alone; more-so, trumpet the values that emerged in the overcoming. It is these principles that will be foundational for those in leadership circles. Bathe others in best principles, incredible values that lead to good, and you will create sustainability in this worthiness era. You will develop more leaders.
4. Keep it fun! While the most powerful, unifying stories, often come from hardship and overcoming, similarly influential stories that galvanize energy, arise from conquering, delight, success, and significance! Victory! Share all that good stuff to inspire, breath confidence and generate optimism and enthusiasm.
5. Finally, music is as great a tool as fireside stories. It spurs us forward in hope and joy! Integrate good music wherever possible with our people, especially when we are in moments of celebration. Good times and great music, balance the powerful learning that we all receive through our wins, via our defeats, and through the lifelong lessons that emerged in how we responded to the greatest challenges.

Here is to your good leadership! What other ideas have you used to maximize leadership impact?