The Hardest Truth to Face: What If I’m Wrong?

The Hardest Truth to Face: What If I’m Wrong?

?“It was really a terrible feeling to know that you are this stupid and wrong.”?

—Jitarth Jadeja, former QAnon adherent

“I felt like I had like horse blinders on. I was locked in the whole time… Take the blinders off, make sure you step back and see what’s going on before it’s too late.”?—Stephen Ayres, who pled guilty to a misdemeanor charge for entering the Capitol

What if you?believed something?with everything that you are and staked your identity on that belief… and it turned out that you were wrong? How would you feel? Could you admit your mistake??

Most people don’t shout about their blunders from the rooftops.?Standard human behavior?is to defend our ego from the shame of being seen as incompetent and foolish. Our brains work hard to protect beliefs that are core to our identities, often regardless of contrary evidence. We do this by?embracing excuses, falling in with?groups that confirm our beliefs, and avoiding people who disagree with us. Of course, avoiding people who disagree with us only fuels polarization.?

On the other hand, you could practice self-reflection, embrace humility, and?accept when you are wrong.?Admitting that you were wrong?about something huge, something you set your clock by and?hung your dreams and fears?on, is NOT standard human behavior. It is?exceptional?behavior. It takes a great deal of courage and commitment to growth.

Let’s mark the second anniversary of the January 6th riot in our nation’s capital, a violent and dangerous moment for our democracy, by finding opportunities to demonstrate this type of self-reflection. Let’s ask ourselves: what if I’m wrong? What would that mean, and how would I know??

The tools needed to succeed in this undertaking are the courage to be self-aware, the curiosity to reflect on our mistakes and misdeeds, and the compassion to embrace reflection, remorse, and evolution in others.

We are starting with us. We hope you are too.

With curiosity, compassion, and courage,

The Starts With Us Team

Updates from our movement:?

  • Happy New Year! Looking for last-minute resolution inspiration? Check out our 2023 word scramble and share yours in?the comments!
  • There is no better way to start the year than doing the?Finding the Way Out Challenge?with daily exercises to assess your own level of polarization and work to overcome toxic polarization in our communities and culture.??

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