The hardest career decision I've ever had to make

It was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make: choosing between my corporate career and my growing family. Sure, women choose both every day, but after a lot of soul searching (literally went on a nature retreat), I realized that wasn’t for me.

My time spent on maternity leave, along with an introspective weekend at Gray Bear Lodge, gave me the space and clarity I needed to decide what was going to make me happy and fulfilled in the new year.

Instead of choosing to go back to my full-time job as a Communications Manager at FedEx Logistics, I made the difficult decision to stay home with my new addition (more on this later).

I can’t begin to express the complicated and complex feelings that went into making this choice. Everyone talks about the money and health benefits you’re walking away from, but there’s so much more to it than that.

My decision wasn’t only about a paycheck. It’s impossible to quantify how much I struggled with this decision and everything I thought I’d be giving up, but I’ll try.

Guilt over letting people down.

Not only did I just leave a job that I loved, I had to say goodbye to my team, which was made up of such incredible talent. My team members were some of the most experienced, kind and dedicated people with whom I’ve ever had the pleasure of working. I respect them immensely.?

What’s more? I didn’t get to personally share the news with the majority of the other people I worked with every day. I was cut off from my email, Teams, and VPN while on leave, which is standard procedure. But as a result, I never got to say goodbye, wish them well, or let them know how much I enjoyed their presence and partnership over the years. So, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to reach out and tell you the news myself, but I hope we can still be friends.???

Total independence.

I’ve been working and supporting myself since I was 18. In college, I held three jobs to pay for tuition, books, food, and rent. I’ve always felt fulfilled by doing a good job and producing results. I’ve never relied on anyone other than myself (and my mom throughout college as I learned the importance of making better financial decisions: beer vs. books). That independence is something I’ve been very proud of and it’s been difficult to imagine the alternative.

Confidence, self worth, momentum.

In every job I’ve had, I’ve been focused on moving onward and upward. Proving myself and earning promotions, awards, and high fives from my colleagues and superiors have always been a great source of confidence for me. Since having Baby Parks, I’m realizing my worth and the value I bring in other ways that don’t involve a title, paycheck, or anyone else’s opinions.

My identity.

Have you ever noticed that one of the first questions people seem to ask when getting to know you is, “What do you do?” Answering with, “I’m a full-time mom” just doesn’t sound as impressive as, “I’m a Communications Manager at a Fortune 50 company.” But I’ve realized over the last four months, it should. Parenting is hard. It’s harder than I could’ve ever imagined, but as they say, it’s also incredibly rewarding (obv). With all of that being said, I’d like to share something a former freelancer I admire (Jessica Pereira) recently shared that resonated with me, “I knew that having a child would change my life, but I didn’t know how much it would change me–my passions, hobbies, and values.”

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Which brings me to…

A new chapter (and new year)

Being available for precious moments, milestones, and outdoor adventures with Baby P is my #1 priority. That made me realize it was important that I do something that allows me to own my schedule and control my own calendar.

With that, I’m excited to share that I’ll be taking a more intentional and focused approach to my freelancing career in the new year.?

As many of you know, I’ve spent several years freelancing in my spare time. I’ve been a contributing writer for Memphis Health + Fitness Magazine since 2020, and I’ve built websites for nonprofits and created content and managed social media channels for small local businesses who needed a hand. Most recently, I’ve added a few national outdoor brands to my client list and now I’m open to adding a few more.?

It’s no secret, I feel most at home in the mountains watching the sunrise with a cup of coffee brewed with water I've heated over a Coleman stove.??My passion for the great outdoors, spiritual wellness, and everything Mother Nature provides is driving this renewed focus on where I want my career to take me. I want it to take me outside. So, that’s where you’ll find me (and our adventure baby).

"Between every two pines is a doorway to a new world." - John Muir

Now that I’ve bared my heart and soul on the internet, I’ll leave you with one question: Where do you see yourself in this new year??

#openforwork #freelance #outdoorindustry #outdooradventure #contentmarketing