‘Hard Work’ Wars: Expectations, Realities, and Resentment

In this edition, we’re digging into why there’s a growing disconnect between employers and employees on what ‘hard work’ should look like, how accountability plays into it.

Who’s Working Hard, Who’s Just Hardly Working?

I was in a clients board room recently and we were waiting for a few folks to join, and the conversation turned to a staff member leaving. And that there were struggling to find candidates who “wanted to work hard”.

And before my brain could kick into gear my mouth asked ‘Can you expand on that’?.

What followed was not a full on rant, but you could feel the frustration. It went something like:

“I dont know what it is with people these days. They just dont want to work hard. They come in expecting eye-watering salaries, dont want to learn the ropes as they know better, and expect to running the joint by Christmas.

Yet the moment you ask them to come into the office, or pitch in when the teams undermanned and they just flatly refuse. And then they think I’m being unreasonable, or old fashioned.

When I was young I would never speak to a boss like that. I would be grateful for the job and not arrogantly think I had all the answers.

What are we meant to do?”

This was not the first time I had heard this type of speech. I see a growing rift between what employees think "hard work" should look like and what management expects.

So, what's causing the gap? Who’s right?

Let’s crack this one open, shall we?

Management’s Reality: "Where Is the Hustle?!"

Some managers (especially the ones who cut their teeth in tougher times) are frustrated. They see a lack of enthusiasm for returning to the office and hear a chorus of "no" when extra effort is needed. And to them? It smells a lot like entitlement.

According to the Microsoft Work Trend Index (2022), 85% of leaders are worried about productivity declines in remote work setups, which, in manager-speak, translates to: ‘Are they actually working, or is Netflix winning again?’

The pressure to deliver is constant, and it feels like dragging a deadweight workforce uphill. They want employees to pitch in, work hard and be accountable for their work. Elon Musk is famous for saying “Nobody ever changed the world on 40 hours a week”. Yet many managers feel the workforce has gotten a little too comfy, that "flexibility" somehow mutated into "flex on your laptop at the beach and maybe work."

To them, hard work is all about grit and getting it done, no matter the cost. It’s what got them to the corner office. So when they see pushback on "just a few extra hours," they’re not just frustrated—they’re insulted.

Employees’ Reality: "Burned Out and Fed Up"

For employees, this so-called "hard work" feels more like a relentless hamster wheel. They’re not lazy. Heck, a Gallup study (2023) found that 64% of workers feel they’re being asked to do more ,with less. When management demands accountability, it often feels like they mean "do more" with absolutely nothing in return.

Not surprising then Gallup also reported employee stress is at its highest levels and the number’s climbing faster than your unread emails. Employees are juggling impossible workloads, work-life lines are blurring, and "availability" is a constant expectation. They’re crying out for clarity, fair treatment, and most of all leaders who actually give a sh*t.

Accountability, to employees, is a two-way street. They’re fine being held accountable if leadership also steps up. Employees want leaders to own their part: support their well-being, offer real growth opportunities, and give clear direction.

Time out! Both groups want Accountability?

Hold up! For hard work to see the light of day, both managers and employees are saying they need to see accountability in action? Only its the other team that must blink first.

Accountability, “The who do we we blame when sh*t goes sideways.” - that old chestnut.

Yet taking accountability is noble and requires an act of courage to take personal ownership for the actions, and decisions made. And to make clear to others you hold yourself accountable. Perhaps this is why accountability is so rare.

But we have weaponised the living crap out of the word ‘Accountability’.

I mean think about it. When something good happens you seldom here folks say “who is accountable for this?” Probably because every person and their dog is saying it was them.

But the moment you accidentally delete your father-n-laws hard drive, which held a lifetime of photos that were not backed up when upgrading it…. The tone is very different “WHO, is accountable for this?”. Good thing it wasn’t me.

Accountable has become a scary #$%! of a word. Survivors know this and they, do everything in their power to avoid their name or role being connected with “accountability”

Different Flavours of Accountability

But theres a couple more layers we need to look at to truly understand accountability in the workplace.

1. Self Accountability

• Definition: This is the personal promise to show up, get it done, and not make excuses. It’s the “I’ll handle it” mindset, even when things go sideways.
• Example: You miss a deadline? No excuses, no finger-pointing—just a quick regroup, learn from it, and come back better.
• Behaviours: Setting your own targets and crushing them Checking in with yourself on what worked and what didn’t, no blame game Actively looking for ways to level up and not waiting for someone to tell you

2. Peer Accountability

• Definition: Peer accountability is about keeping each other honest and on point. Think of it as the unspoken pact that you can rely on each other to do their part. In kickarse cultures teams have autonomy and it’s always underpinned by peer accountability.
• Example: Say your team’s got a project deadline. If someone’s struggling, the rest don’t just sit back, they step up, check in, and pitch in to keep the whole thing on track.
• Behaviours: Calling out when things are slipping (without the drama) Offering help or a nudge when needed Shouting out each other's wins, big or small—because we’re all in this

3. Leadership Accountability

• Definition: This is where leaders don’t just talk a big game, they have to walk it. They own the team’s highs and lows, take responsibility when it hits the fan, and clear the way so their people can actually get stuff done.
• Example: Picture a leader who wants to nail a high profile project yet knows the team is exhausted and under resourced. Rather than use an inappropriate pep talk of ‘suck it up princesses” they check in with what support the team needs, what options they can think up together, and what tradeoffs can be made.
• Behaviours: Owning mistakes without sugarcoating or sidestepping. Removing roadblocks for the team, not adding to the clutter Setting clear expectations for everyone, including themselves Resourcing teams in line with the values.

Barriers to Accountability

We all get accountability is a good thing, as its fundamental for building trust in teams, reduces conflicts, and engaged staff actually get stuff done.

So why then do we suck at encouraging accountability in leaders and employees? Surely it cant be that hard?

I mean we have a list of go-to management phrases to draw from:

• “Remember, we’re not just a team; we’re a family… who has to hit quarterly targets!”
• “Hard work never killed anyone... but let’s test that theory this quarter!”
• “You’re not overworked, you’re developing resilience”
• “Here, we don’t call it burnout—we call it passion”
• If all else fails scream - “Do your #$% job!”

So I reached out to Rob O’Donnell my trusted co-host on the Corporate Therapy Podcast and the self described People and Culture fossil, and asked what stops folks from holding themselves or others to account.

He had a top five barriers:

• Fear of screwing up the Relationship: People sidestep holding others accountable because they're terrified it'll mess up the vibe or turn colleagues into frenemies.
• Vague Expectations: When the “what” and “why” are MIA from the get-go, it’s a guarantee that accountability's going to be a hot mess.
• Fairness is out to lunch: If you’re not playing fair across the board, then trust and any chance at real accountability are out the window.
• Default to Blame: When accountability turns to finding the fall-guy, don’t be shocked when everyone’s ducking for cover and motivation is sinking fast.
• Accountability Skills Crisis: A whopping 82% of leaders admit they’re not so great at holding people to account, while 91% of staff are basically begging for them to level up

So how do we embed Accountability?

No rocket science here, just humans learning to trust each other and get crystal clear on how they’re showing up for each other to win.

1. Set Clear & Fair Expectations

We tend to tiptoe around what’s expected, or set goals so abstract that everyone’s left thinking, “WTF?” And it’s usually top-down. Let’s flip that

• Co-create crisp outcomes - Forget the vague, abstract BS. Share the “what” and “why” behind the company’s goals as they need context to anchor back to. Invite the individual to shape what goals they hunting down, and together map out how you’ll know they’re nailing it. Key here is being crisp on what the evidence needs to show up for them to nail it.
• Align on Behaviours - When was the last time you actually talked about behaviours that work and the ones that, frankly, don’t? ?Do this as a team – create a deck of behaviours that actually fly here. In one-on-ones hone in on which behaviours you want them to work on and why. I find when you tie it back to a career or personal goal of theirs its more like to resonate. Again be crisp. Rather that say lets work on you being more outgoing, instead try “how do you feel about chairing two team sessions this quarter?”
• Make expectations memorable- ?Employee manuals where expectations are often enshrined are either fire-hosed at onboarding or wielded during performance reviews. Either way your unlucky to remember them. Instead, challenge your team to re-write, draw, film, them in a way that’s memorable.
• Check your Biases at the doorI wish I didn't have to type these words, but here we are in 2024 - “give everyone the same opportunities to grow and showcase their skills.”

2. Consistent Feedback

No one likes performance reviews, so we tend to space them out as wide as possible. Yet we all need clues on how we’re going. But Im not taking about grading folks on a bell shape curve and watching morale crater. I’m taking about two way chats in the spirit of building empathy, shared understanding and trust.

• Make regular times to catch up– don’t wait for things to go south and then miraculously feel you can rebuild trust when things are $%#!. Work together on how those sessions can fit in with each of your mad lives. Could we do this over a walking chat, a zoom session or a coffee face to face. The more formal you make this session the less likely you will both open up.
• Get curious about them, not the task - I stuffed this up as my bias is to getting stuff done and I would default “to what have you done, whats coming up, great see you next week.” I had to learn to pivot to “how are things with you”, “what have your enjoyed this month”, “what has done your head in this week” or “what’s keeping you up at night”. Topics that focused on the individual and their reality. Because once you have that empathy and understanding thats when the magic starts to happen.
• Praise progress, even if it’s small. When I first heard this advice I had an allergic reaction to the thought of giving gold stars for turning up. But the reality is most people at work hate their job, and yet they turn up each day hoping somebody notices their efforts. Show that you are interested in seeing them genuinely succeed. The best leaders I recall all gave a damn about my career and stretching my potenial. Back their futures, and they will back you.

3. A shot at learning, not assigning blame

When things inevitably go south, you want to be able to shift accountability being viewed as “a shaming ritual” to a constructive session where we learn from it:

• Step back and breathe – before you launch into orbit. Pause, breathe. Perhaps the hardest step when emotions are running high. Hold your self to account on what role did you play in this? ‘Was I clear on my expectations or did i give a sh*t brief?’
• Give them the space to talk - Start by asking “how did you feel it went” as this gives you a a few clues to work with. Are they tougher on themself that you would be. Or are they oblivious to the fallout of their actions. Or is the body language showing they are doing their damndest to blame Larry from Finance for their stuff up
• Listen to learn, not to judge - as you hear the answers, ask yourself what they had the tools and support they needed to succeed.
• Focus on next steps, not past errors – show them how to get it right next time rather than dwelling on what went wrong.
• Wrap up with “How can I best support you going forward?” as this gives the individual a chance to ask for help. Note some staff may still feel nervous in asking their boss to change or adapt. So self reflection remains key.

That’s a Wrap

This divide between management and staff about hard work and accountability isn’t going to just magically disappear. But here’s the good news: if both sides are prepared to listen, we can start to close the gap.

Leaders, its time to ask are you setting your team up to succeed? And employees, think about what accountability means to you and how you can own it to shape your career.

Thanks for sticking around. If any of this hit home, share, comment, or let me know what’s working (or not) for you.