Hard Things, Big Rocks, and Time Management

One of my guilty pleasures is that I love cooking competition shows.??A couple of weeks ago I was watching a season finale in Master Chef, where one of the contestants was repeating as a mantra to herself, “I can do hard things,” while feverishly working to beat the clock and create her masterpiece.??At first, I laughed because it seemed a little hokey to me, but I could also see how that reminder helped her in the moment.??There are probably few situations that would be more stressful.??Competing against the very best, while on national television, for a prize that could change the trajectory of your life.??For someone in that situation it must be tempting to feel like it is all about to fall apart.??The contestant must find a way not to let that worry consume their talent.??Shining into that abyss is the light of the reminder that we can do hard things.

While most of us have never performed on a national cooking show, we all face challenges where we go through the same set of worries.??For example, as a prosecutor, perhaps you have been on the eve of trial in an enormously tough case wondering how you were going to pull it off.??Or maybe you’ve been about to go into the meeting with the family of a victim to explain why you can’t charge a particular crime and you are worried that your empathy and communication will be insufficient to meet their trauma in that moment.??Or possibly you are near the beginning of your career, and you feel like you are always treading water, trying to stay afloat in a docket that never seems to be under control.??In those moments, we need to remind ourselves that we can do hard things.??And if you need some evidence, look no further than law school.??Every semester I remind my students that as tough as it is to be, that someday they will be able to look back on the experience and know that if they were able to get through law school, they can get through anything.??We know we can do hard things because we already have.

But that’s not to say that we can’t use some help along the way. And finding tools for time management is one of the biggest boosts we can use, because time is our greatest asset.??The city I work for has a wellness app for its employees where you can earn points for various activities. When you earn enough points, it reduces your monthly insurance premium.??One of the activities that you can do is to watch videos on a variety of topics.??One was suggested to me the other day called “The Big Rocks Come First.”??Variations of this metaphor are widespread on the internet.??They tell of a professor who stood before the class with a jar, and he filled it with rocks.??He asked the class if the jar was full, and they responded that it was.??Then he took a box of pebbles and poured it into the jar, shaking it so that the pebbles would fall into the open spaces between the rocks.??He again asked the class if the jar was full, and the class responded that it was.??So, this time he took a box of sand and poured it into the jar and gave it a shake and sure enough, the sand fell into the crevices.??But, if you tried the experiment in reverse order, it wouldn’t work.??The sand and pebbles would form beds that leave little room for all the rocks.??In this metaphor the big rocks represent our highest priorities.??And the argument is that if we know what our priorities are and focus on those first, we will find time in the spaces around those priorities for the smaller stuff of everyday life.??But, when we instead focus on the small stuff, we find that time is squeezed out that we would have otherwise spent on the things that really matter.

When I heard this, it reminded me of what I’ve written about before on the Pareto Principle and the notion that we should focus our work on the activities that produce the greatest results in our life.??But this rarely happens.??Instead, we get distracted with chasing after so many things that don’t matter, that as each day ends, we wonder where the time has gone.??Meanwhile, the most important parts of our life don’t get the kind of investment that they deserve.

The finalist on Master Chef got where she was by investing in a clear vision.??She knew what was important to her and put effort in those priorities, which is exactly why when we she was chanting, “I can do hard things,” that she was right.??Every moment of her life had prepared her for the challenge in which she found herself.??It is exactly at that moment that it was critical to remember that she was indeed equal to the task before her.

The same goes for us my friends.??We have tough jobs, daily pressure, and demands all around us.??But we can do hard things.??I know because we have.???This week may we find clarity on knowing what the big rocks in our life are and the wisdom to start with those when we are filling our jars.

David A. Lord

Deputy Commonwealth's Attorney

City of Alexandria