Happy Women's Day. Let's try not to get raped this year.
Ashleigh Harvey
Marketing rebel on a mission to help coaches not write shit. Let's use your voice and your copy to help more people (and make f*&k-you money).
Today, 9 August, is Women's Day in South Africa.
He should smile more
Smile, dude.
He’d be so much cuter if he smiled
He's too loud
You’re a good driver, for a guy
Come on, give us a smile
Men’s films, also known as dick flicks, are called that because they deal with men’s issues. No one has any interest in those things.
Men’s writing is a discrete area of fiction because men write about special men’s things. It’s of no interest to most people.
Should men embrace their natural grey hairs?
Remember to smile, guys. Women like positive men.
All women need a woman cave: a place where we can escape men, men's kids, men's mess, men's noise.
Should your working wife or girlfriend really be expected to help you with the holiday packing?
Men’s tennis is boring
Are you a new dad? There are so many ways your wife can be involved in your child’s life. You just need to encourage her to play a full and active part.
I’m going to interview a man about what it’s like to be a GP and a dad. What should I ask him?
Male author and male doctor are NOT offensive terms. It’s just a way to differentiate them from normal authors and doctors.
How can we commemorate men’s very worthwhile contribution to our past?
Your wife changes nappies? That is amazing!
Get your wife to babysit.
I’ve been commissioned to write an article for summer, called how to get your best summer penis ever. Where should I start?
Are you a working dad? That must be so hard.
Is it OK for dads to put themselves first sometimes?
I’m writing an article about men supporting other men. What amazing things can men accomplish when they lift each other up?
Don’t be so bossy
Don’t wear that to school, you’ll distract the girls
He's too ambitious
Let me tell you about how business works, luvvie
His contraceptive doesn’t work for me. Best he sorts it out or it's over
Men belong in the kitchen
Come and dance with me. Come on. Let’s dance. Why not? Why don’t you want to dance with me? Come on. Dance with me. Come on, man. Let’s just dance. Come. Wow. You’re such a fucking arsehole.
If guys want to wear shorts, they deserve to get raped.
He was asking for it
He's a fucking whore
Don’t be a slut, dude
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No woman wants to have sex with a virgin
How much did he have to drink that night?
Well, what was he wearing that night?
Why does he get so emotional?
He's such an attention whore
He's really bitchy
He's so dramatic
It must be that time of the month
He’d be really hot if he just made an effort
He’d be much hotter if he smiled
Is that all you’re gonna eat?
You eat a lot for a guy
You drink brandy?
You like cricket? Wow, that's impressive for a guy.
His drive is kind of intimidating
Can men have it all?
He doesn't want kids? Isn't he worried he won’t be fulfilled?
His biological clock is ticking
You’re not taking your wife’s last name?
Is he planning on working after the baby’s born?
He's going to let someone else raise his kid after he goes back to work?
Does your wife mind that you make more money than her?
Are you really fulfilled as a stay-at-home dad?
Ssssh…the women are talking
Maybe he should calm down – this is why I don’t hire men
He's too old to be doing another degree, what about starting a family?
I know he's the most experienced person in the business, who’s done the most work, but we can’t make a man a Vice President. The other women wouldn’t be comfortable with it.
He's not just a pretty face
Oh, he works in mining? Is he a secretary?
I know you’re a partner in this board meeting, but can you please take the minutes and make the tea. Men are just better at that stuff.
Men are sly. They’re snakes. Men can’t be trusted.
I've heard all of these before, but always about women. Because we don't say these things about men. If we did...well, people would just look at us funny. Like we've lost our minds. Saying these things about women, though? Totally normal.