Happy New Year!

#Manageyourmind

The embarrassing?fist fight between two Indians on an International flight two days back gives us an opportunity to discuss an interesting subject. How do we behave in public places? Why are we all conflicted so much among ourselves?

Any fight is a disaster which should never happen. Fist fights erupt when we are overcome by instant emotions and we lose the capability, temporarily, to use our intellect to control our mind and our emotions. Provocations are plenty in the world which draw us towards conflicts and many times towards instant fights. A post mortem of a fist fight like the one we saw on this International fight would show the trivial nature of the reasons behind it. ??But at that moment it looks very justifiable to both the persons. Like road rage this too is an example of wasted emotions and energies.

A fight is fine in a battle field. But not in an airplane or on the road where we all are co-travellers. It is a temporary relationship. We may say the same about life too. We all are undertaking our own journeys in life and as such are co-passengers for a short period of time. ?We must cultivate the ability to accept co-passengers’ behavior with a calm mind. We have to keep in mind that each person reacts to a situation differently based on how his/her mind and intellect got curated over decades since birth. As long as we keep in mind that each person is made up differently and evolved differently we might develop a better understanding of others behaviour and accept it peacefully. Wrong expectations from others and situations lead to disappointments, frustrations and eventually to anger and fights.

Look at our air travel. There are many conflict zones!

Our desire to get ahead of others through hook or crook is reflected in many places, not just at airports! Starts at baggage screening where each person tries to push his/her bag ahead on the belt!

When the airline announces boarding we see some people jostling to go forward by breaking Q at the gate or by edging out those in front of them. If it involves a bus travel to the aircraft it is even worse. I find it very amusing because the plane will not leave without all the passengers who checked in. Why such a rush to board the flight? All those in the Q are boarding the same flight. Still we try to be ahead of others. Fights in Q is not uncommon, even in airports! Unbelievable!

Many youngsters carry their backpacks nowadays. They don’t follow the simple logic that when you enter confined places like lift, bus, aircraft, etc your backpack is causing inconvenience to others, occupying precious space and banging other people’s bodies. A simple precaution of holding the backpack in hand while in confined places would solve the problem. Instead the person with a backpack behind him/her keeps on turning and navigating his/her way through such space unmindful of the discomfort his/her backpack is causing to the others. Lack of awareness about others around you and lack of sensitivity to what you are causing to the others is rampant in our society and it gets reflected in aircraft too. Lack of simple common sense. I have seen fights breaking out on this front.

It is very common to see people using their mobile phones to watch movies or videos during the flight. It is not uncommon to see some of them not using ear phones causing disturbance to the others!

The other day some one called an airhostess his 'servant'! Wow! Just because you paid a few thousand rupees to travel on that plane the airhostess becomes your 'servant' !!!

But something that I really find amusing is at the time of disembarking. Soon after the flight lands and as the aircraft reaches its parking bay and even before the airline crew announce that passengers can disembark every one stands up and moves into the walk way. People sitting in window seats trample upon the toes of those in the middle seats and aisle seats and rush into the walk way! People who sat through the journey for more than 2 hours can not wait for a few minutes to disembark!! The walkway gets crowded! ?Some of them may actually rush out but end up waiting at the baggage belt for their bags to arrive! Wasted effort!! A simple principle to be followed for disembarking is to let the passengers in the row in front of you to disembark ahead of you. But we compete with each other there too! Every one is rushing to disembark ASAP!! An organized way of disembarking will make it faster for every one. And it will be peaceful for every one!

In all the above situations one can get upset and angry leading to fights! Everyday in life we face such situations. The world is not designed to keep meeting ?the expectations we have from it. The world has its own way of working. It is our wrong relationship with the world which creates conflicts.

We have no control on the behaviour of others, especially our co-passengers who are strangers. What we should have control on is our mind. If we control our mind using our intellect we will be in a better place. Remember that it takes at least two to have a fight. Even if one of the two exercises control on his/her mind there would be no fight!

Our mind is the culprit. Our mind is full of emotions. If we are under the control of our mind and not in control of our mind, emotions overflow and such undesirable fights happen. We have to develop ?control on our mind through the application of our discretion and intellect. This is not possible without determined practice!

Undesirable competition with each other and stress are consuming us in our daily lives. It shows at such places. Our minds are always on the edge! No peace inside us! What are we competing for? What are we running after? Pause and think!

It is time to examine our behaviour at public places and bring certain decency, decorum and sensitivity to the way we conduct ourselves. It does not mean that at private places we can be insensitive to others! It is a skill and attitude we have to develop in all walks of our life. Calls for a lot of effort at controlling our mind!

Let us hope 2023 will be free of conflicts, wars and fights among nations, religions, races, castes, groups and individuals. Peace is essential for growth – both economic and personal. Divided, conflicted and agitated nations and minds will not grow. Let peace prevail in the New Year! Best Wishes to all of you and your families!!?Happy New Year!!!