Happy Festive Season! Or Is It?

We all love the Christmas season don't we? Or do we? I know this goes against the societal projected norm of togetherness and the image of the perfect Christmas as advertised on the telly - of togetherness - of joy - of eating lots of food with lots of people smiling - of parties - giving, etc, (and, don't get me wrong I like all of the above) but we are all human and this article is a recognition of reality. Is there too much expectation or pressure on us that Christmas should be a time of cosiness, joy, merriment and mirth?

So, if you're not in the mood and it's going to dampen any Christmas joy to read this short article, please come back to this another time or don't read it at all - that's ok. My articles are written for everyone and some will not always be your cup of tea.

Christmas time can be a stressful and worrying time for many. In fact, it can be overwhelming. Questions or thoughts can arise like:

• I'm working, how am I going to give everyone the Christmas I want them to have, I just don't have the energy?
• Where am I going to find the time to get everything done?
• I want my kids (anyone) to have the best Christmas ever but I don't think I can afford to this year.
• Or the concentrated stress of spending more time alone in a relationship you don't want to be in.
• Or worrying about relatives who are ill or elderly.
• Or not wanting to be anywhere near relatives or family.
• Or as with all red letter days, missing the ones who are no longer here.
• Or feeling very alone.

This time of the year can bring up all sorts of emotions. It's ok to feel them as evidence shows that just ignoring them makes them come back stronger. Just know that if it's all getting a bit much, you can speak with a healthcare professional, you really are not alone.

So I'd thought I'd write a few tips down which are often lifecoaching goals to help reduce Christmas overwhelm:

1. When it all feels a bit much with a large amount of things to do, making a to-do list can be really helpful. It sounds obvious but just break down tasks into smaller and manageable ones. Set realistic deadlines and create a schedule to keep organised.
2. There really is an art to delegation. Can anyone else help you? If you live with others can they take on some of the jobs that need to be done? Or friends? Assigning tasks to share the load can really reduce your individual workload. People like to be needed and useful. It won't be a burden to them. Online shopping is a superb way of focusing on your key gifts and sticking to your budget.
3. It's also a time to put in place some boundaries. Say 'no'! This will help you from taking on too much. It's ok to say no to invitations or to taking on too much. People can do without you for once. They will respect you for it. It's important to prioritise yourself and not burnout this season.
4. A lot of people talk about self-care. It really is important to look after your mental and physical wellbeing at this time. Whatever helps you to relax and recharge, do it. Even if it's taking a moment or ten.
5. Different families will have different expectations or traditions. By keeping things simple for yourself and making choices that you are happy and can live with, you will reduce your stress. Focus on traditions that bring you joy and are important to you or your values. Perfection is not the goal and no-one can create a flawless holiday experience, try and relax into it and choose what's important and realistic at this time.

The true spirt of this time of the year is about spending time doing things that are meaningful to you or having connections with people who are important to you. It's not about the material stuff. It's not selfish to have the thoughts or emotions above - just real. By prioritising and spending time on what is important to you it can help to reduce the overwhelm.

Whatever type of festive season you are having, wishing you a great break and a very healthy and happy season,

Katherine

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