HAPPINESS IS GIVING

“What did you get for Christmas?” is a frequently asked question. But an even better question is “What did you give in 2023?” Some gifts are expensive but in the long run not very valuable. However, there are valuable gifts anyone can afford, gifts that will bring great joy to the receiver – as well as to the giver.?

If you didn’t give these in ’23, consider them as we celebrate Christ’s birth and move into 2024. If you gave them in ’23, the cost will be minimal to increase your giving – and the payback will be magnified considerably.?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF PRAISE. I’m not talking about false, syrupy flattery. I’m talking about giving real praise to people who deserve it. This involves not only thanking someone personally, but mentioning his or her contributions in front of others. The person could be commended for displaying positive qualities or for accomplishing good jobs or deeds.?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF CONSIDERATION. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. I saw a couple of young adults who were sitting in church and making fun of a mentally and physically challenged person. I lost respect for these people and made a point after church to speak to and shake hands with the ridiculed person. Maybe I shouldn’t have thought it, but I wished the two mockers could change places with the one they mocked.?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF CONCESSION. This involves saying, “I’m sorry; you’re right and I’m wrong.” Again, like true praise, this involves honesty. If you’re wrong, admit it. If you’re right, try to work out things with the other person as smoothly as possible, and make it as easy as possible for the other person to offer some concession.?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF GRATITUDE. Don’t ever forget to say, “Thank you.” Other phrases such as “I appreciate it very much” or “I appreciate you” are valuable gifts often given much more sparingly than they should be.?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF ATTENTION. Listen when the other person is talking. If you’ve read my ”Are We Communicating Yet?” book, or if you’ve heard me speak on this topic, you may recall my emphasizing the average listening retention factor in our society is from 13-17%. What if you’re among the listeners who rise high above this percentage? Not only will you gain an edge in learning but you will also be considered a great communicator and people will deeply appreciate you.?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF INSPIRATION. Plant seeds of encouragement in the other person’s heart and mind. Everybody needs encouragement, support and affirmation. In my talks, one of the things I’ve said hundreds of times is “Make me glad I’m me when I’m around you.” If you can make people feel better when you’re around them and if you can lead them to be encouraged by your words and presence long after you’ve left, what a valuable gift you’ve given!?

* GIVE THE GIFT OF PERSONAL PRESENCE. In health and sickness, in times of great joy or trouble, there is nothing equal to your personal presence and honest expression of congratulations or sympathy. “Being there” is more important than what you say. Don’t try to wax too eloquently in times of celebration or offer too much advice during times of pain. The mere fact you’re present can make a profound difference.

Happiness is giving.

_____

? 2023 by Carl Mays, National Speakers Hall of Fame member and author of over a dozen books, including A Strategy For Winning (foreword by national champion football coach Lou Holtz). Visit carlmays.com