To be happier worry less about what people think. 8 things help.

Many people struggle with letting the “opinions” of others impact their self-confidence.?

It’s a ubiquitous human desire to feel appreciated and many people place heavy emphasis on what “other people think”.

Many of these uncomfortable feelings trace back to childhood.

Shame and perfection are often the catalysts that drive this internal impulse based on conditions that were strongly associated with affection.

Parents, teachers, and bullies can all impact how we perceive “acceptance”, and many of those memories can be linked to insecurity and feeling unworthy.

Once we understand that feeling appreciated isn’t a bad thing, we strive to achieve balance between being appreciated by the right people and dismissing the opinions of people that may have malicious intentions.

“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.”—Lao Tzu?

To be happier worry less about what people think.?Do 8 things:

Reality.

People don’t think about us as much as we believe they do.?Once we embrace that reality, it liberates our thoughts to spend less time contemplating what other people think.?We appreciate they don’t care as much as we think they do.?In addition, remind yourself everyone has insecurities.?The people we think care so much about us have their own problems.

Imagination.

People gravitate in the direction of cognitive distortions.?Negative thinking that can impact our mood. This causes us to assume the worst or jump to conclusions. Notice when we start letting our imagination wonder and question the efficacy of our thinking.?Much of what we worry about is only in our mind.?

Perfectionist.

Many people wrestle with a perfectionist mentality.?They believe if they do perfect work, they will receive the accolades they desire.?When we seek love and admiration from other people it sets us up for disappointment, not to mention perfection is an illusion. People’s “opinions” have nothing to do with us but has everything to do with them.?

Self-discovery.

Until we do the difficult work of being true to ourselves, we often follow a path created by somebody else.?Well intended parents can push us toward a career we don’t even like.?We stay in fruitless relationships believing “it’s the right thing to do”.?When we focus on developing our authentic voice, we spend less time seeking validation for things that don’t even make us happy.

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”— Dr. Seuss

Friends.

Much of the negative feelings associated with feeling accepted originate in our social environments.?How often have I said quality friends' matter.? Hanging around perimeter friends that constantly undermine our attempts to grow is exhausting.?We need to find a close group of quality friends that support our dreams and stay away from the people that jeopardize our self-confidence.

Vulnerability.

Learning to walk alone takes guts and that requires being vulnerable.?Sometimes we need to pull away from unhealthy people and have the courage to be true to ourselves before we can experience the joy of sharing healthy relationships with people that reciprocate.?Once we accept the pain of progress, we learn to embrace the discomfort of personal improvement and more satisfying relationships.

Help.

The barriers we face to reconcile with our past can be significant.?If you’ve experienced some trauma that contributes to your feelings of insecurity, maybe it's time to see a professional.?There’s no shame in asking for help, and there’s plenty of experienced professionals that can work through complicated issues with you.?

Learn to love yourself.

I can’t begin to tell you how much I enjoy my own company.?I spend hours alone and take great satisfaction in being at one with nature. It’s humbling and inspiring.?Until we learn to love ourselves, we often rely on the opinion of others to validate our self-worth.?Learn to love yourself and you won’t need to worry about what other people think.????

“No name-calling truly bites deep unless, in some dark part of us, we believe it. If we are confident enough, then it is just noise.” ― Laurell K. Hamilton

Sum it up

Do you struggle with caring too much about what people think? Share your thoughts in the comments section and please like and share this article. I love learning from you as well.

About Steve:

Steve Wohlenhaus is CEO of Weatherology, the leading company in the world at disseminating audio weather information.??Steve began his career as a major market television weather anchor in Minneapolis, where he received several Emmy Awards for science programming.?Steve is an author and host of the podcast program Anatomy of Success.?Reach out and connect with me on LinkedIn.?Learn more about my work and grab the free Weatherology mobile app by clicking any picture in this article!