Handling Difficult Situations

“Talk about it”, they say. Ha! Easier said than done, but no one actually tells you how.

At the crisis end, AIHW?research shows a sharp rise in crisis lines like Lifeline and an increase in ambulance attendances for suicidal thoughts and self-harm in both NSW and Victoria.??At the other end of the scale, stress is leading to every-day poor behaviour in virtual meetings, at counters and on the phone. Difficult behaviour can turn to the impossible and quite odd behaviour can appear completely out of context and if it is not dealt with, it affects you, your customers and the outcome.

One client shared how a particularly difficult client in negotiation over a project delivery had caused the resignation of one employee, the breakdown of another and a third who was finding it hard to speak in meetings. These are issues that spiral over time and they don’t get better by not dealing with them.

If a difficult conversation is defined as one in which the other person has a viewpoint that differs from yours and the stakes seem high, then there is no better example than that revealed on Sept 11th in The Sydney Morning Herald of the interaction between then-tourism Minister, Fran Bailey and the boss of Tourism Australia, Scott Morrison. We are talking $180 million ad campaign, a Prime Minister who remained distant, a ban from British TV and the eventual dismissal of Mr Morrison.??It took guts to manage and the Hon Fran Bailey had plenty.

How did she do it? Interviewing Ms Bailey, I find her one of the sharpest performers I have experienced, with a mind like a steel trap, a wicked sense of humour and a drive to get results. Fran thrives through the hardest of challenges, as a rare breed of women in the Federal Parliamentary circle, managing the largest constituency in Victoria and traversing one of the worst crises of our nation - Black Saturday that swept across her ward.

There is no stopping Fran! Her sharp wit always comes to the fore, disarming those around her (perhaps honed by a time together with the likes of Paul Keating). She is funny, she smiles, she laughs and can always see a different perspective. But there is nothing funny about Fran’s ambition to get results and solve problems without crisis. When building an understanding is done, Fran cuts to the chase.

This is what I call the Kung Fu technique. It means approaching a problem by first using techniques such as acknowledgment and reflection and then, when rapport is established, engaging with solutions. Having a process and techniques also helps you maintain your mental state and make better decisions.

I have coached and studied the situation for decades to great success and I have devised frameworks for various stages of difficulty, that involve a process of thought, identified suitable words and, of course, the critical non-verbal and vocal aspects of conflict.

Together Fran and I are combining our skills to help you with your difficult situations. Please join us for 4 weeks of interactive learning and discussion from 19th?October, every Tuesday morning for one hour at 9am. You won’t want to miss it.