Most of the time, we feel bad or end up overthinking because we take things personally. We need to learn that not everything is about us. We often interpret every comment or situation in a way that makes it seem personal, which leads us to overthink. It's important to remember that other people may be dealing with their issues, and their actions or words are not always a reflection of us.
REMEMBER IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU:
You put yourself under unnecessary stress by constantly worrying about what others think of you. It's neither helpful nor productive.
To strengthen this mindset, focus on these three things:
- Accept Yourself: Embrace those who do not need external validation.
- Surround Yourself with supportive people; Spend time with those who uplift you and avoid negativity.
- Control the need for approval; Remind yourself that your worth is not defined by others' opinions.
instead of guessing why someone said or did something, ask them directly. Often, we misunderstand situations because we assume the worst. Clear communication can help you avoid unnecessary stress.
Focus on these things:
- Ask for clarification; If you're unsure, ask the person to explain themselves.
- Avoid jumping to conclusions; Don't make assumptions without knowing the full story.
- Communicate openly; Share your thoughts and feelings to prevent misunderstanding.
Pause before reacting;
when you receive criticism or hurtful comments, take a moment to pause. Reflect on whether responding is worth your time and energy.
Focus on these things;
- Take a deep breath and stay calm; give yourself a few seconds to compose yourself.
- Consider the bigger picture; Think about whether this comment will matter in the future.
- Respond with purpose; Decide if a response is necessary, and if so, reply calmly and thoughtfully.
SET BOUNDARIES;
You don't have to tolerate everything. If someone's behavior bothers you, create space for yourself and calmly communicate your boundaries.
Focus on these things;
- Understand your boundaries; Know what you can tolerate and what can't, and be clear about your needs.
- Communicate clearly; Express your boundaries directly but respectfully.
- Stick to your boundaries; Don't feel guilty for protecting your well-being.
- Respect others' boundaries; Just as you set your boundaries, respect the boundaries of others.
LET THINGS GO;
Holding on to others' mistakes only harms you more. If someone has wronged you, learn to let it go wisely. Don't allow their mistake to turn into bitterness, and don't hold on to anger towards anyone.
To practice letting go, focus on these three points:
- Control your behavior and reactions; respond thoughtfully, not impulsively.
- Value your own opinion: What matters is what you think of yourself, not what others say.
- Accept what you can't change: Embrace things that are beyond your control.
STAY MINDFUL;
Focus on the present moment instead of replaying past conversations or imagining future scenarios. Overthinking makes the situation worse.
Focus on these things:
- Be aware of your thoughts: Recognize when your mind starts to wander or overthink.
- Stay in the present; Focus fully on what is happening right now, rather than dwelling on the past or future.
- Practice deep breathing: Calm your mind with a few deep breaths when feeling overwhelmed.
BECOME DANGEROUSLY CONFIDENT;
You're only affected by others' opinions when you have low self-esteem. Nothing can shake you when you believe in yourself and know your capabilities.
Focus on these things:
- Know yourself
- Breakthrough self-limiting beliefs
- Stand tall
- Empower yourself with knowledge.
QUICK PRACTICES TO KEEP CALM:
- Visualization; Imagine a protective bubble around you to deflect negativity.
- Mantras: Repeat phrases like" It's not about me" to stay strong.
- Self-reflection: ask yourself '" is this really about me, or are they projecting?"
- Pause and breathe: take a deep breath before reacting to anything upsetting. This gives you time to think clearly.
- Gratitude shift: when you feel hurt, focus on one thing you're thankful for to change your perspective instantly.
THE FOUR AGREEMENTS:
- Be impeccable with your word: speak with integrity, and say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others.
- Don't take anything personally: Nothing others do is because of you, what others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. Let go of the need for approval.
- Don't make assumptions; ask questions and what you want. Communicate clearly to avoid misunderstandings.
- Always do your best: Your best is going to change from moment to moment. Simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.
