Guys - just get tested

You might think that after 40 years of working in the Chartered Accountancy profession, trying to do the right thing, giving lots back to the community through voluntary roles and trying to be a good mentor and coach, a guy would be entitled to a bit of relaxation in “The Third Phase”. During those years, I have had a healthy diet and exercised well (I average 16,000 steps a day, have stayed relatively fit and I weigh exactly the same as I did 30 years ago).

You might also think that knowing your wife will slowly deteriorate with a rare incurable brain disease for 28 years and being her main carer for the last 15 years of her life would add to that expectation.

And you might think that her dying 3 weeks before your planned retirement date, and her funeral taking place the day after your retirement day (and your 36th wedding anniversary) was enough heartache for one person to suffer.

However, it would seem that is not the case. Life doesn’t work like that.

In April, I had a routine BUPA Corporate Health Screening (thank you Bishop Fleming Chartered Accountants ). The day before Lit died, I was told that my PSA score was dangerously high (guys, if you don’t know what a PSA score is read further below and visit https://prostatecanceruk.org).

The weeks post retirement and funeral have involved more PSA tests, an MRI scan and a Trans Perineal Biopsy (44 needles taking prostate samples where you do not want one needle going let alone 44).

I had the results a week ago. I have aggressive Prostate Cancer through my whole prostate. The aggressiveness of the cancer is measured on the Gleason Scale. Maximum is 10. I score 9.

And just to be clear, I have no noticeable symptoms and I feel absolutely fine.

The next step is a Choline PET CT scan to see if the cancer has spread. After that I have to decide with my consultant what mix of hormones, radical surgery and radiotherapy I have. The next 6 to 12 months will not be a bundle of laughs. As a bloke, any medical discussion that includes the phrase “chemical castration” is not exactly uplifting (excuse the pun). I will do whatever I have to do to live as long as I can. That includes one of my best friends, who is a strength and conditioning coach, dedicating himself to getting my body in the best state it can be (given the broken and creaky bits).

In November last year, my dear Lit said to the consultant treating her aspiration pneumonia: “You need to keep me alive for this f***ing baby”. She managing to spend 6 days at home with our first grandchild Milo before she died in May.

I outlined to my consultant yesterday, inspired by Lit, my own challenge “Project Milo 21”. I intend to speak (embarrassingly well) at Milo’s 21st?Birthday Party. His job is to keep me alive to do so.

Today is the Day #1 of that journey as I started my first daily hormone treatment.

Every bloke over 50 should get their PSA tested every year (especially black guys and those with a family history who are particularly susceptible to this disease). I did so every year thanks to the fantastic Worcestershire Ambassadors programme at Sixways until Lockdown (during which my PSA was always very low) and my medical was the first check since then.?

1 in 8 men will be diagnosed with Prostate Cancer during their lifetime but it has one of the best recovery rates when caught early – so guys don’t dick around, get tested. And if you find yourself in the position I am in, lean on your mates. They have been, and are, helping me to get through the trauma of the last few years and they, with my amazing family, will get me through this. I know a bunch of blokes who have dealt with prostate cancer (or are in the process of doing so) and they have all provided support and inspiration.

I have no idea whether I should share this (lots may say not) but if one bloke reads this, gets checked and finds a problem earlier than he might have done, it will be worth it. I intend to share my story as I go.

Now to catch a flight for the first time in 3 years and spend 4 days in Portugal at a friend’s birthday party. Sorry for the split infinitives.

#prostatecancer #ProjectMilo21