Guilt vs. Shame: The Leadership Trap and How to Break Free (Your Thursday Three Things for October 24, 2024)

Jon Macaskill here, back with your weekly dose of wellness and leadership tips. This week, we’re tackling something heavy but super important: guilt and shame—and why it’s crucial to know the difference between the two. Trust me, understanding these emotions can have a massive impact on your health, your leadership, and your ability to move forward with purpose.

Guilt vs. Shame: What’s the Difference?

Guilt and shame are often lumped together, but they’re not the same. Here’s how they differ:

• Guilt is feeling bad about something you did. It’s specific to an action. For example, “I feel guilty because I missed an important deadline.”
• Shame is deeper. It’s not just about an action, it’s about who you are. For instance, “I’m a failure because I missed that deadline.” See the difference? Shame becomes personal, attacking your sense of self.

Why Does This Matter for Leaders?

As leaders, we all make mistakes—it’s part of the job. Guilt can be useful in small doses. It nudges you to reflect and course-correct. But shame? That’s the killer. Shame makes you feel unworthy, incapable, and paralyzed, which not only affects your well-being but also impacts how you lead your team.

Here’s how guilt and shame affect your health and leadership:

1. Guilt Drives Change; Shame Stifles It Guilt can be productive. It’s that voice

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