Growth is Change

This article was first written when Eagles Academy sat down to plan for ERC's Student Council's Leadership Retreat in June 2018. [Part 2 of 4]

Part 1 - Growth Matters / Part 3 - Measuring Growth / Part 4 - Leading Growth

Here are three changes for growth:

The Price Of Change

Very often when we look at someone successful, our hearts fill up with a sense of longing, of wishing we were able to do what that person does. But would you do what that person did in order to do what he is doing today?

Successful people often took a long and painful journey to success. Top athletes study, train, diet, get injured, fail, try again and again until they get to the top of their game. Most people do not understand the sacrifice and hard work it took. Only the person who actually took the journey truly knows what is required. The cost of change is often the great separator between those who grow and those who do not; between those who grow into their dream and those who dream but remain where they are.

Every level of growth calls for a new level of change. ~ Gerald Brooks 

The price of change usually comes sooner than you think, is higher than you imagined and needs to be paid more often than you expected. To continue growing is to continue paying the price of growth.

One of my students used to be awkwardly tall and clumsy. He loved to play basketball but he was so bad at it he would always be the last in a schoolyard pick. He used to feel hurt and the rejection got to him. I asked him why he wanted to play basketball so bad, and suggested that playing a different game would not be a bad plan. But he shared with me that he had a passionate dream of wanting to play in the school team.

At this point, it would be worth mentioning that people generally get confused between being Goal Focussed and being Growth Focussed.

Goals on one hand are seasonal. So the focus is on a destination. It motivates and challenges people but stops when the goal is reached. The question on goal focussed people's minds is “How long will this take?”

Growth on the other hand is lifelong. So the focus is on the journey. It matures and changes people; and people continue to growing more when each goal (or milestone) is reached. The question on growth focussed people's mind is “How far can I go?”

Thinking all he had was a goal - to play in the school team - I suggested that he could work on getting his basic skills right just so he can be more valuable in a team. I told him that he need not depend on anyone but could practise on his own if he had no one to play with. He took up that advice and never strayed. He practiced on his own when there was no space in the teams. He gave his best whenever he was on a team despite being the last choice. Rejection only made him stronger.

A couple of years later as he graduated from my class, he was selected for Direct Schools Admission (DSA) for basketball. There he received the right training and eventually reached his goal to represent his school in national competitions. With his stature, he became the star of the school team. But that was not where he stopped. He continued to grow.

Little did anyone expect, he went on to be a national basketball player representing Singapore at the Youth Olympics. Something none of those who used to avoid picking him to be on their team managed to achieve. There's a difference between people who think they are born with talent, and those who practiced from young. Between those who are used getting louder cheers and those who fixed their eyes on taking their skills to a higher level.

Growth begins at the end of our comfort zone. To grow, one must embrace change and learn to be comfortable with discomfort. People who are stuck in comfort zones are characterised by doing the same things in the same way with the same people at the same time and getting the same results. Albert Einstein says that is the very definition of insanity! People who love their comfort zones are the ones who protest the loudest because their lives do not get any better.  Success depends on your growth, which will always require change.

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results. ~ Albert Einstein

The Cost Of Affirmation

As a teacher, I came to learn that when I call someone smart, I unknowingly put that person on a pedestal and then all eyes are on the "smart one". That person becomes a benchmark for "smart". For that person, life becomes organised around deserving of the pedestal. Everything becomes limited to and revolving around staying on the pedestal. He selectively lives his life by narrowing his choices to things that he is sure he is good at, and can succeed in.

So much of what we say makes an impression without us knowing. If I say “You solved that sum so quickly, I am so impressed!”, the student hears, "If I am not fast, you would not have been impressed. If I say "You got a distinction even though you did not work so hard!", the student hears "If I needed to work hard then I am not smart."

In order to cultivate a Growth Mindset in children, I suggest something contrary to what we are taught in teacher school. Instead of making an attempt to affirm students with positive words, just show interest in the process for a change. Focus and appreciate the process that a student goes through, give encouragement regardless of whether he is trying new strategies or choosing to stick to the old one. Completely avoid praising intelligence or talent, rather praise progress and effort with one caveat: never ever praise effort that was not there to begin with.

Researchers (Claro and Paunesku, 2014) have found that children with growth mindsets will do far better than those with fixed mindset, regardless of Socio-Economic Status (SES).

The Result Of Testing

Parents in Singapore have become so obsessed with the standardised test that they have become the number one cause for children becoming less intelligent over time. Consequently but not surprisingly schools and teachers have lost the plot. Standardised tests were originally an attempt to be fair but when certain demographic groups or schools consistently performed poorly, parents took things into their own hands and blamed the (education) system or even the test for being too difficult.

They demanded remedial, they engage private tutors, they sign their children up for all sorts of preparatory classes such as Gifted Education Programme (GEP) Preparatory Classes! Giftedness is supposed to be innate and not forced, yet one Mr Noor Azman says “We don’t believe in him making his own choices (as a nine-year-old), so we have to channel him a bit here and there.” The irony is that if the child was indeed gifted, he would have been fully adept at making his own choice.

Simply to appease such parents, schools and teachers became all about tests. They no longer teach to ignite a sense of wonder and curiosity, rather they teach to prepare students for the test because their pay and bonuses depend on the results. Students are made to believe that the test results reveal how smart they are and will always be when they grow up. Students are put through unnecessary nervousness all through school when it should have been enjoyable.

Whether you are are parent or a teacher or a school leader, do not get sucked into this destructive cycle. Teach children to learn how to learning and face challenges, afford them the opportunities to feel the thrill of improvement through perseverance. Results of test will come.

Be a part of something bigger, share your thoughts with me - I am collecting ideas for a book. Like + Comment + Share, please. Ta!

Reference:

Claro, S. & Paunesku, D. (2014). The mindset gap among SES groups: The case of Chile with census data. Paper presented at SREE Fall 2014 Conference.