Growing Pains. Growing Gains.

I saw a video on LinkedIn the other day, of a couple that had been married for 28 years. One of their children took it of them {without them knowing} playing in the snow together. Just laughing and having a good time. It was a beautiful reminder that we should not stop playing.

My wife and I have been married for 20 years. And despite losing most of our families {including our daughter}, her becoming permanently disabled, losing our 7 houses causing us to start over again, you would never know it. Why? Because we’ve never stopped playing. Some would call them growing pains. I call them growing gains.

We don’t try to have all the answers. That’s the answer. We’re just happy to be in each others company. Good times, bad times we’re by each others side. Supporting, talking and truly being alive. After all that we have been through, we’ve never avoided the hard conversations. Those pains, became gains. Yes, we would love to have our loved ones back. But we’re thankful for the time that we had with them. We didn’t get stuck. Our optimistic attitude and playful spirit helped dramatically.

When you lose family and money, it can be overwhelming. But it wasn’t. Because we didn’t lose faith. Sure, our lives look much different heading into the storm, than heading out. We’ve never stopped being grateful. Neither one of us would permit it. I think giving up would be a disservice of all the good things they imparted onto us.

There will be pain in your life. But you decide to give up or get up. Luckily for me, I have a wife that matches my “the world is beautiful” viewpoint. We pray, meditate and communicate with each other. And because we do, they are not growing pains. We grow into gains. Maybe it’s naivety. Maybe it’s denial. I call it choice. And we choose to look for the blessing, not to carry the burden. And having gone through the unthinkable, I can tell you this. Nothing is impossible. It only feels that way, because we were told it couldn’t be.