Growing on My Terms

Throughout my career, I’ve been told time and again to pick a path and stick to it, to follow the traditional route, and to do what’s expected. But I’ve learned that real fulfillment comes when you choose to walk your own path, even when it goes against the grain. For me, this journey hasn’t just been about following my own goals but about growing through setbacks, embracing my strengths, and building a career on my own terms.

It's My Path

Choosing my own path hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been worth every challenge. Early in my career, I have had a few small businesses, each of which taught me lessons I could never have learned otherwise. Some of those ventures were successes, and some were failures - and it’s those failures that shaped me the most. Each time things didn’t go as planned, I came away with new insights and a renewed drive to do things differently.

Over the years, I’ve realised that building a fulfilling career means having the strength to say No to what doesn’t align with my values, and Yes to the opportunities that feel right to me. As Steve Jobs once said,

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life”.

I took that advice to heart, and it’s allowed me to grow in ways that I couldn’t have imagined if I had simply followed what others thought I should do.

Thinking Differently

One of the greatest rewards of following my own path has been the freedom to think differently. Working across different industries and roles has allowed me to grow in ways that wouldn’t have been possible if I’d taken a more conventional path. Each role has shown me new perspectives and unlocked unique ways of thinking. That willingness to go against the grain - to explore and learn across fields - has made me stronger and more adaptable.

Thinking differently is what drives innovation, both personally and professionally. It requires passion to stay motivated when the path isn’t clear and to keep pushing forward when others doubt you.

“The person who follows the crowd will usually go no further than the crowd. The person who walks alone is likely to find themselves in places no one has ever been before” (Albert Einstein).

For me, this journey isn't about finding success - it’s about uncovering what truly excites me and following that with passion and purpose.

Knowing My Strengths

Understanding my own strengths has been a game-changer in my life. Over time, I’ve learned what I’m naturally good at and how to use those skills confidently. It’s been about focusing on the areas where I add the most value and leaning into those strengths rather than trying to mold myself into someone else’s ideal. Having said this I've also realised my weaknesses too, and I'm trying to work on them.

I’ve also realised that self-awareness is key to growth. People who use their strengths daily are not only more engaged in what they do, but also tend to experience a higher quality of life. By focusing on what makes me feel strong and capable, I’ve been able to grow in ways that feel genuine and sustainable, instead of just chasing someone else’s definition of success - a failure of many, and one I'll not fall into again.

Overcoming the Pressure of Comparison

It’s easy to get caught up in comparison. We live in an age where it’s tempting to measure our worth against what others have achieved. But I’ve learned that comparing myself to others only holds me back. My journey is mine alone, and my goals are built on what I want, not what others deem as successful.

Theodore Roosevelt said,

“Comparison is the thief of joy”,

and that rings so true in my experience. It takes practice, but letting go of comparison has allowed me to appreciate my unique path and the milestones I’ve reached on my own terms.

Growth is a Journey

Growth isn’t always linear; it’s a journey driven by passion, resilience, and the courage to keep going even when things don’t go as planned. Every experience I’ve had - every win and every setback - has helped me grow stronger, more resilient, and more self-aware.

I think of the Japanese concept of kaizen, or continuous improvement. It’s a reminder to focus on small, daily steps toward my goals. Over time, these small steps add up to big growth. This journey has taught me to embrace every moment as part of my story, even the ones that don’t feel like success on the surface.

Being My Own Success

Ultimately, I’ve come to realise that success is about living in alignment with my own values and purpose, not just meeting the expectations others have set for me. For some people, success might mean achieving a certain title or status; for me, it’s about growing into the person I aspire to be and contributing meaningfully wherever I am.

“Success is knowing your purpose in life, growing to reach your maximum potential, and sowing seeds that benefit others” (John Maxwell).

My journey has been about setting my own measures of success and recognising that, for me, real achievement lies in living authentically and growing on my terms.

So what...

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that embracing individuality, trusting my strengths, and following my passions has been the most fulfilling path I could take. Every time I’ve chosen to follow my own direction, I’ve discovered something new about myself, become a little stronger, and moved a bit closer to the life I envision.

So, if you’re standing at a crossroads, wondering whether to follow the well-worn path or take a step in a direction that feels right for you - take that step. Embrace your individuality, follow your passions, and let your own strengths guide you. Because the greatest success doesn’t come from meeting others’ expectations; it comes from growing into the best version of yourself, on your own terms.

I hope my thoughts here can help at least one person who reads this - In the end, it’s your path, your growth, and your story. Own it!!!

Thanks for reading,

Ben